Will you talk to the teacher if DD is 1% point away from passing
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Anonymous
| No. She has ADHD, not an intellectual disability. She should not coast through life just because she "forgot". It's not the teacher's fault. It's the kid being irresponsible. |
Anonymous
Thanks for your ignorance. ADHD is a brain-based neurological disorder. People with ADHD have real brain differences that make it difficult for them to do certain tasks. If you believe that people in wheelchairs or with diabetes or with dyslexia should recieve accomodations and special instruction appropriate to their individual disability, then why not ADHD? None of those disabilities are "intellectual disabilities". A kid with ADHD has a disability and should receive appropriate supports - consistent reminders about missed assignments, extended deadlines, parent and teacher daily monitoring of assigents and completion. That obviously wasn't happening in this case. Kids with ADHD need more explicit instruction in organization of work, self-monitoring systems, breaking projects down into components, etc. They also need a longer period of time to develop these skills and habits than "neurotypical" kids. ADHD kids aren't stupid or lazy or irresponsible. |
Anonymous
I agree. But have to say that a child can be lazy and irresponsible, in addition to having ADHD. In teens it can be hard to delineate. Either way, you're totally right that based on what's been disclosed here, this child and family need more support. |
Anonymous
| Medication does not help much with executive functioning and adhd kids are not lazy... |
Anonymous
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I guess the question is whether you would intervene for a kid without ADHD. It sounds like your child got appropriate supports, but didn't do the work necessary to receive a passing grade. She was even given an extra opportunity and chose not to take advantage of it.
Also, your description of her "cursing out the teacher" and pitching a temper tantrum when you take her phone away suggests you've got bigger problems on your hand. You need to demonstrate that actions have consequences, and figure out who the adult in this relationship is. The other point is this - do you want her to move onto the next level of science and math, knowing that she just barely passed this year. None of this is setting her up for success. Not the intervening with the teacher. Not giving into her temper tantrums. Not passing her along when she hasn't mastered the material. |
Anonymous
I have two boys with ADHD and sometimes they are, in fact, lazy. Most of us have our moments. I think it's a fair question to raise because the supports and interventions are going to be different depending on the reason for the problem. |
Anonymous
| From the way OP is talking it doesn't sound like the apple fell too far from the tree. |
Anonymous
| I would not. I would encourage HER to talk to her teacher if she thinks it is unfair. |
Anonymous
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She needs to learn (and reinforce) cause and effect. She didn't do work that she knew about and was capable of doing, so she failed. It is what it is.
Also, take away her phone. Saying that she throws a tantrum when you take away isn't reason not to do this - it's justification to do it. You're enabling awful, bratty behavior that's only going to teach her that if she pitches enough of a fit she will get what she wants. Don't use her disability as an excuse to coddle her in this way. You can be compassionate but firm without letting her walk all over you. |
Anonymous
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sounds to me that the grade boat sailed. Your daughter had more than one opportunity to turn in certain assignments - on time, and later for full credit, and didn't. Why was there no follow up by you throughout the year checking to see if she was completing assignments?
Staying up late to do homework would imply that the assignments should be ready to be turned in the following morning. If not, you need to monitor her time a little more closely going forward. As far as the phone, personally, I'd remove it. If she's avoiding working to use it, and going to act like a 2 year old if she can't have it, then she isn't in a position to have it. |
Anonymous
Said the person without a child with special needs... |
Anonymous
As a former high school teacher, this happens so so often. I always, ALWAYS offered extra credit to kids. I taught at an inner city school and truancy was a big problem. One of the classes I taught was a requirement for graduation and I always gave students who were in danger of failing the opportunity to make up work and/or absences. It was completely up to them to do it. It sounds like your DD deserves to fail if she didn't do everything she could to make up the work, do extra credit, etc. in order to pass. |
Anonymous
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What grade is your child in, OP? Since this is Earth Science I'm guessing 9th or 10th grade, is that correct?
I could have written your post a couple of years ago. Our DD came close to failing several classes and had Cs and Ds in most others. Her test scores were so inconsistent, and especially summatives were usually ghastly. When she did her homework and turned it in on time she was okay, but Edline showed so many 0's because DD just would space out and forget to turn things in. It was bad, but things improved a lot in Jr year. Mostly this was due to her brain maturing, and also we upped her Adderall dose and got her academic coaching. So my advice is let the science grade stand but tackle the larger issue of helping your DD to succeed by putting all of the supports in place that you can. Then take a deep breath and believe that it will probably get much better. Some kids need to fail before they succeed, but most will get there in due time. |
Anonymous
Actually my child does have SN, and an IEP. Been at this game since DC was 9 months old; DC was non-verbal until 6 and is now 14. I still think allowing any student (SN or not) to write their name + guess at one question and getting half credit is ridiculous. |
Anonymous
| My DD has pretty severe ADHD attentive. When tested, even on her meds, she showed impairment. If it were my DD, I would definitely not intervene. Your daughter clearly had opportunities to bring her grade up sooner and made a choice not to. She didn't earn a passing grade. She was provided supports. The only time I would ever intervene is if my daughters accommodations had not been provided or a grade truly seemed unjust (as in an essay with subjective grading or an art project). Don't look for excuses to blame the teacher. From your description, the responsibility is your daughters. Personally, my goal is to have my DD make the connection between effort and results. If you fix this, it will happen again and again. |