When someone doesn't reply to texts...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL. I do not respond to texts from anyone but my kids and DH. I respond to emails once in 24-48 hours. I do not respond at all to FB status etc. If I get a direct message from FB - I still respond only within 24-48 hours.

Unless, I pick up the phone when you call - you can assume that I will get your voicemail in 24 hours.

Yes, everything is pretty much instantaneous, but I am not going to be available at all times for anyone's convenience but my immediate family.

My texts to my kids is also very short. It is to the extent of - "I am waiting outside the school, soccer complex etc.". or "I am running 10 minutes late". There is no reason for me to be texting otherwise.

I have friends who send group texts with jokes etc., I usually will not respond to it. I think a response is to be expected only if you need an answer from me.

I also feel that I do not have to chime in when group announcements are sent. Unless it is a life and death situation.

This is how I live too. I'm happy to have an enjoyable email exchange, but it happens when I can get to it, not immediately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe her phone doesn't receive texts. Or maybe she doesn't have a text plan (I don't, but I respond to email). Or she's a flake.

Besides being rude about responding to texts, is she a good friend? If so, let it go. If not, let her go.

She replies to them eventually or after I send another text 9 hrs later. She is a great friend but we no longer work at the same place, so we don't see each other often. As a result, I text more since I am not seeing her everyday.

Eventually is good enough. It seems clear that these are not urgent communications. Switch to email.

[Anonymous]

I check Facebook from our iPod and don't have a smart phone. I tend to leave my phone in my purse so texting is pretty much the worst way to reach me, and I tell people that. Maybe your friend is the same but hasn't told you?

[Anonymous]

I'm terrible responding to emails. My main form of communication is text. If you text me, I'll text you back. If you email me, forget ever getting a reply. I get busy and forget.
So what I'm saying is that she may get busy and forget.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Or maybe she's posting on Facebook on her computer, not her phone.

this is me. when I am home I use my ipad and my phone is often in my purse in the other room so I usually don't get text until a few hours after I receive them or even the next day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't reply to texts because I don't want people to text me as a regular form of communication. It annoys me when people just randomly want to chat by text and expect an immediate reply 24/7. I think you should take a hint op. She is not replying because she is trying to train you not to text her. Call or email instead.

This. I do it too.

Me too. I'm just not a texter and have no desire to communicate by text unless necessary.

[Anonymous]

I had a text-stalker friend like you once:

I had fun tonight, thanks
How are you today?
Are you watching the Bachelorette?
I don't know if you got the last text I sent you but are you doing anything next Tuesday?
Did you get my text?

So freaking annoying. Needless to say, we "broke up".

[Anonymous]

My phone doesn't receive texts, so I don't even see them. If people try to send me a text I don't ever get a thing. I set it up that way on my account b/c I hate texting and hate being interrupted and accessible 24-7.

That said, the senders do not receive a message, "This recipient does not receive texts," or anything like that. So I've tried to tell everyone I know. I don't want anyone getting offended if I appear to not reply.

THAT said, some people still don't believe me and think I'm just choosing not to reply. Like: MY MIL! She supposedly sent me some text about hangers and then thought I just chose not to respond. No, I DON'T GET TEXTS, JUST LIKE I ORIGINALLY TOLD YOU, REMEMBER? DUH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My phone doesn't receive texts, so I don't even see them. If people try to send me a text I don't ever get a thing. I set it up that way on my account b/c I hate texting and hate being interrupted and accessible 24-7.

That said, the senders do not receive a message, "This recipient does not receive texts," or anything like that. So I've tried to tell everyone I know. I don't want anyone getting offended if I appear to not reply.

THAT said, some people still don't believe me and think I'm just choosing not to reply. Like: MY MIL! She supposedly sent me some text about hangers and then thought I just chose not to respond. No, I DON'T GET TEXTS, JUST LIKE I ORIGINALLY TOLD YOU, REMEMBER? DUH.

Edited to add:

My main form of communication is FB. It enables me to tell a lot of people one thing all at once. So it's very time-efficient for me. I have one friend who is not on FB, and I understand, b/c if it does not work for her, it does not work for her, but then don't get mad at me if I am not texting or emailing you. I FB. That's it.

[Anonymous]

I don't like to have "conversations" by text, either. Texts are for asking a quick question or conveying a piece of information. And I don't respond to everything (email, FB, voice mail) immediately. Just because I have a smart phone doesn't mean I'm required to interrupt my life or ignore the real live person I'm with (which I find incredibly rude) to answer it. I'm not on call.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But constantly updates their FB, do you think that they are being rude on purpose?

I have a close friend who is like this. I will text her and she won't reply at all yet all day she is on FB. If I ask how she is, she will say "sorry, I didn't reply... I have been busy". It just seems like common courtesy to me that when you see a text, you shoot a quick reply.

You sound very young. How old are you? Most people I know in their 30s and 40s don't text this way and would consider this immature and teenager-ish. Most people I know just text to say, "Be there in 5 minutes," or something like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL. I do not respond to texts from anyone but my kids and DH. I respond to emails once in 24-48 hours. I do not respond at all to FB status etc. If I get a direct message from FB - I still respond only within 24-48 hours.

Unless, I pick up the phone when you call - you can assume that I will get your voicemail in 24 hours.

Yes, everything is pretty much instantaneous, but I am not going to be available at all times for anyone's convenience but my immediate family.

My texts to my kids is also very short. It is to the extent of - "I am waiting outside the school, soccer complex etc.". or "I am running 10 minutes late". There is no reason for me to be texting otherwise.

I have friends who send group texts with jokes etc., I usually will not respond to it. I think a response is to be expected only if you need an answer from me.

I also feel that I do not have to chime in when group announcements are sent. Unless it is a life and death situation.

You sound unapproachable. I get not being on a device 24-7 but it sounds like you don't ever want to be available to anyone but your kids -- unless you accidentally happen to pick up the phone when someone calls though I'm guessing you screen calls too. It would be exhausting to be your friend.

+1

[Anonymous]

The social communication trends kind of fascinate me. Everyone has different preferences and standards. You just don't take things personally, and go with the flow. I'm an oldster who has friends with every permutation of social media preference. When our preferences don't mesh, we get out of touch for very long periods of time, but real friends stay friends.

I was just going through a box of old letters yesterday. They were brilliant, funny, touching, and full of tidbits and commentary on the times and on our phases of life. I guess we'd better find a way to archive interwebz stuff.

[Anonymous]

If she's otherwise a good friend and you do communicate, I'd ignore it and switch my mode of communication. If you find that she still isn't responding -- then you should assume she's not super interested or she isn't the kind of person who wants to chat.

Like PPs have said, she could easily be on her computer/ipad all the time but leaving her phone in her purse for hours at a time.

[Anonymous]

17 perfect responses for your situation:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/laraparker/perfect-responses-for-when-someone-doesnt-text-you-back?bffb