I will NEVER forgive my sister

[Anonymous]

OP, this sucks but look at your sisters likelihood of making this out to be a lasting relationship. Given the history that you've provided us, this will soon be over too. You're going to have to troop it out until the inevitable happens. As for her daughter, remember that this isn't her fault. She is just an innocent child in all of this. She will need you and everyone else when it all falls apart. I salute you for keeping the peace for this long. Don't listen to all of the other negative people.

[Anonymous]

FruminousBandersnatch wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you sleep with a guy after a few dates, while you are on a rebound, and he doesn't keep you trailing along, five years later he is fair game for your sister.

Actually no, they started dating months after he did what he did to me - they just hid it from me. -OP

So you're saying that your sister started dating a guy 5 years ago, got pregnant at some point, had a baby and now they are getting married and this is the first time you've ever heard that it was the guy you dated?

I'd say that you and your sister aren't close, anyway.

No, they hid it from her and the sister is now pregnant.

[Anonymous]

FruminousBandersnatch wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you sleep with a guy after a few dates, while you are on a rebound, and he doesn't keep you trailing along, five years later he is fair game for your sister.

Actually no, they started dating months after he did what he did to me - they just hid it from me. -OP

So you're saying that your sister started dating a guy 5 years ago, got pregnant at some point, had a baby and now they are getting married and this is the first time you've ever heard that it was the guy you dated?

I'd say that you and your sister aren't close, anyway.

No, what I am saying is that I've known it's been going on for well over four years now and I have handled it the best way I know how. It's all coming to surface because I'm not invited to the wedding for the sake of her fiance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

FruminousBandersnatch wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you sleep with a guy after a few dates, while you are on a rebound, and he doesn't keep you trailing along, five years later he is fair game for your sister.

Actually no, they started dating months after he did what he did to me - they just hid it from me. -OP

So you're saying that your sister started dating a guy 5 years ago, got pregnant at some point, had a baby and now they are getting married and this is the first time you've ever heard that it was the guy you dated?

I'd say that you and your sister aren't close, anyway.

No, what I am saying is that I've known it's been going on for well over four years now and I have handled it the best way I know how. It's all coming to surface because I'm not invited to the wedding for the sake of her fiance.

[Anonymous]

You really need to focus hard on moving past this. That said, you sister sounds like a total skank.

Don't feel too bad about not getting invited to the wedding. I'm sure you sister will invite you to the next one.

Hugs to you.

[Anonymous]

OP,

Take the high road. It's your only option to save your sanity. Send a wedding gift and be glad you don't have to refuse the invite.

The one to be pitied and prayed for is actually your sister. She does not sound stable: multiple relationships with children, as well as not inviting you to her wedding? Very immature.

So the best you can hope for is that they stay together, and that they raise their children well!

You don't have to be besties with them - just smile and say hello when you meet them at unavoidable family gatherings. Like a PP said, focus on the children, they are innocent.

The only thing that worries me in all this is the man "staring" at you. If that is true, he seems a little deranged, which might be why you seem so inordinately upset by the situation. Do you think he is embarrassed and doesn't know how to act in your presence? Or do you think he is intimidating you in very controlling unhealthy way? In that case I would be afraid for your sister and her children.

So limit personal presence. Pay all the long-distance lip-service and send all the wishes and gifts required by the occasion, however outraged you feel internally about it. In time it will all be water under the bridge. (If he's not crazy, that is.)

[Anonymous]

Here's what you're missing: the wedding in invitation will have a direction for guests to buy gift cards. Your sister squeezing herself into a too-tight strapless white dress exposing all her skanky tattoos. The groom will have a deer-in-the-headlights look on his face and will probably be stoned the entire time. It will be a cash bar and/or a potluck. And there will be a huge fight.

Be grateful you are not invited to this.

[Anonymous]

Just sleep with him after they marry and let your sister know what happened. Tell her that she now knows how it feels to be hurt.

She will then be as pissed off at you as you are at her!

[Anonymous]

Living well is the best revenge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just sleep with him after they marry and let your sister know what happened. Tell her that she now knows how it feels to be hurt.

She will then be as pissed off at you as you are at her!

Classy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Living well is the best revenge.

But it just takes so much effort. Give OP an easier plan like showing up drunk to show off her new bf.

[Anonymous]

Reading this thread is worse than watching reality TV! I feel unclean.

[Anonymous]

I have a sister who has slept with and had inappropriately close relationships with my exes (plural). She's also on husband number three. First was common law. Second was shotgun. For her third (which she now counts as the second because technically the first was just her first baby daddy since they never had a legal ceremony.) she wore full on white with a veil. No, I am not related to Kim Kardashian. Lol.

Do you see how unglamorous and gross it all sounds when you remove your personal feelings form it?

I used to get upset with my sister. Now I pity her and pray she makes it to 40 without having to snag herself husband number four.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a sister who has slept with and had inappropriately close relationships with my exes (plural). She's also on husband number three. First was common law. Second was shotgun. For her third (which she now counts as the second because technically the first was just her first baby daddy since they never had a legal ceremony.) she wore full on white with a veil. No, I am not related to Kim Kardashian. Lol.

Do you see how unglamorous and gross it all sounds when you remove your personal feelings form it?

I used to get upset with my sister. Now I pity her and pray she makes it to 40 without having to snag herself husband number four.

Where do you live?

I do realize that life beyond the DC bubble is very different, but I actually figured people had more class beyond the beltway not less.

[Anonymous]

Troll. I've seen this before in a Dear Abby column.