what to do about mentally ill neighbor?

[Anonymous]

Adult Protective Services maybe.

[Anonymous]

I would call the police each time it happens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ensure he doesn't have guns.

+1

If he has guns, you would be best off moving - for your safety, and the safety of your children. If you talk to a lawyer that handles this kind of thing often, this is what they will tell you. It will help you can legally challenge whatever (additional) stunts he pulls. Most importantly, it will keep you safe from an off kilter individual. PERHAPS they will target someone else. If not, you have what you need to go forward.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would call the police each time it happens.

Police can't help unless they actually witnessed what happened, most of the time. Witnesses don't help unless they actually saw what happened. Don't ask someone to play witness when they did not - they will get into huge trouble. Video will help - that is really the best route (rather than wasting time with he said, she said).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi, this is OP and thank you for all the responses. I really appreciate it a lot. We own, as does the neighbor. I do wish that this neighbor could get help, for their sake as well as our community's. My question is how to do this, and my fear is that our efforts may not do any good while also making us a target of the neighbor's paranoia and rage. Their rants take on racial and sexual overtones that are really, really horrendous. We have not yet lodged a noise complaint with our HOA out of reluctance to react in any way to this volatile person. But of course that is a first line of action. I did call the county and there is a crisis unit that does respond to these cases. I was told that the report remains anonymous, and I hope that is the case. As I said, we don't particularly want to get involved. This neighbor is not exactly likable/lovable. But, without sounding too co-dependent here, I'm don't think anyone else will make an attempt to get this person help if we don't. And there's no way to know what their issues may escalate to, against themselves and others. Again, thank you all so much for taking the time to respond.

Hi OP.

I have worked with mental health crisis response in the past, and I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Many neighbors choose to ignore the situation, out of fear of getting involved, retaliation, whatever. Many times, this is the worst thing that could happen for your neighbor because they truly need help and are not able to get it themselves. When I did this work, what would happen would be that we would come to the house and talk with the person, observe their living situation, etc. If they are symptomatic, there are options available to help them get treatment, including options that can be exercised even if your neighbor doesn't want them to be. Please try to be patient, but also protect yourself and your family. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Lol. Don't buy a condo. Or get ear plugs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd find your local NAMI chapter and find out what kind of community options there are to have someone visit this person. It's very hard to force someone into treatment that doesn't want to, but in some locations there are local adult services who can drop by.

http://www.nami.org

I second this. The police should have a special unit for dealing with people in crisis. I can't remember the name of it. I would also continue to call the police. My sister, who is mentally ill, only got help after almost 20 years because I called the police on her and filed a police complaint. She was required by law to get help -- but that is the settlement we worked out. I know know about a non-relative whom you just want to avoid. But go thru the condo association too and document every complaint. They don't have the laws in place to dealing with serious mentally ill people and sometimes the only help is thru the police.

This. Keep your name out of it.

I find it ridiculous that people just say "move" b/c you can find bad neighbors just about anywhere.

Also, I find it disconcerting people's views on the mentally ill. If the OP lived next door to a decorated war veteran suffering from PTSD, would you respond with such disdain? Mental illness isn't a choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol. Don't buy a condo. Or get ear plugs.

So helpful

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would try kicking him out the condo, mental illness or not. It is a disturbance to all living there.

You are the heart of compassion.

[Anonymous]

This thread was started four years ago. The OP is likely long gone.

Why do people revive threads so old and then chat as if the person is still here reading?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread was started four years ago. The OP is likely long gone.

Why do people revive threads so old and then chat as if the person is still here reading?

+1

Welcome to the real estate threads. You new here? LOL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi, this is OP and thank you for all the responses. I really appreciate it a lot. We own, as does the neighbor. I do wish that this neighbor could get help, for their sake as well as our community's. My question is how to do this, and my fear is that our efforts may not do any good while also making us a target of the neighbor's paranoia and rage. Their rants take on racial and sexual overtones that are really, really horrendous. We have not yet lodged a noise complaint with our HOA out of reluctance to react in any way to this volatile person. But of course that is a first line of action. I did call the county and there is a crisis unit that does respond to these cases. I was told that the report remains anonymous, and I hope that is the case. As I said, we don't particularly want to get involved. This neighbor is not exactly likable/lovable. But, without sounding too co-dependent here, I'm don't think anyone else will make an attempt to get this person help if we don't. And there's no way to know what their issues may escalate to, against themselves and others. Again, thank you all so much for taking the time to respond.

I hate to say this but you are pretty much right on in your assessment of the situation. The neighborhood crazy we had mostly effected her next door neighbor and every time they reported something, the neighbor ramped up the crazy. There was a consistent 3+ year history of reports to the county and police that finally resulted in a family member stepping in but those few year were bad for the neighborhood in general but really terrible for the direct neighbor.

What the PP described above was us a few years ago dealing with a total lunatic next door to us.

The worst of it lasted a year and a half, and in retrospect, we should have moved. We have been in our house 15 years, but what we went through with young children in the house almost defies description. I still have PTSD from it.

In our case, the person finally went to jail and part of her supervised probation upon release involved court-ordered medication. Thankfully, her family sold the house and disappeared. She moved across state lines. But I was stunned at how little anyone – the police, the mobile crisis unit, the court system, the hospitals – could do. Her family committed her dozens of times and 10 days later she was out again and not taking her meds.

It's not worth it. Just beat it the hell out of there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi, this is OP and thank you for all the responses. I really appreciate it a lot. We own, as does the neighbor. I do wish that this neighbor could get help, for their sake as well as our community's. My question is how to do this, and my fear is that our efforts may not do any good while also making us a target of the neighbor's paranoia and rage. Their rants take on racial and sexual overtones that are really, really horrendous. We have not yet lodged a noise complaint with our HOA out of reluctance to react in any way to this volatile person. But of course that is a first line of action. I did call the county and there is a crisis unit that does respond to these cases. I was told that the report remains anonymous, and I hope that is the case. As I said, we don't particularly want to get involved. This neighbor is not exactly likable/lovable. But, without sounding too co-dependent here, I'm don't think anyone else will make an attempt to get this person help if we don't. And there's no way to know what their issues may escalate to, against themselves and others. Again, thank you all so much for taking the time to respond.

I hate to say this but you are pretty much right on in your assessment of the situation. The neighborhood crazy we had mostly effected her next door neighbor and every time they reported something, the neighbor ramped up the crazy. There was a consistent 3+ year history of reports to the county and police that finally resulted in a family member stepping in but those few year were bad for the neighborhood in general but really terrible for the direct neighbor.

What the PP described above was us a few years ago dealing with a total lunatic next door to us.

The worst of it lasted a year and a half, and in retrospect, we should have moved. We have been in our house 15 years, but what we went through with young children in the house almost defies description. I still have PTSD from it.

In our case, the person finally went to jail and part of her supervised probation upon release involved court-ordered medication. Thankfully, her family sold the house and disappeared. She moved across state lines. But I was stunned at how little anyone – the police, the mobile crisis unit, the court system, the hospitals – could do. Her family committed her dozens of times and 10 days later she was out again and not taking her meds.

It's not worth it. Just beat it the hell out of there.

+1

[Anonymous]

Maybe talk to some of your neighbors and file a joint complaint w/the HOA.

Or Adult Protective Services.

[Anonymous]

I know this is an old thread, but it's an interesting topic.

To those saying sell/get out of there, I'm thinking in some states you would have to disclose this situation to the buyer. While it's not a specifically mandated disclosure, many states have other statutes that require disclosure of known nuisances or criminal activity on the property. I worry that if you don't disclose, you could be setting yourself up for a nasty lawsuit later. Thoughts? Obviously it's state specific.