Teacher's note on homework: "What a mess. Are you proud of this?"

[Anonymous]

Sounds like WES

[Anonymous]

I would mail to not to the Head of School and ask if he/she thinks it is appropriate. Makes me start singing, Teacher leave those kids alone.

[Anonymous]

Nasty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nasty.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My problem with the teacher's comment is that it is borderline sarcastic. She/he is basically saying "you can't possibly be proud of this".

I'm also a high school teacher and would never in a million years write that on the work of a young-ish student - actually, not for any student.

I would speak quietly and calmly to the teacher about this. I think you are right that they were having a bad day. Tell the teacher you want to work with him/her to improve your kid's performance.

+1 -- I agree with this assessment and advice. I taught 5th grade and currently tutor MS students, and while it's important that students in upper ES grades and MS take pride in their work, I would not write a note like this -- it's shaming. Instead, I might have written something along the lines of "This was messy and hard to read. I know you can work more carefully." If I noted a consistent problem, I would talk with the parent about strategies for addressing it.

FWIW, I have 3 children of my own who are now in college and HS. Of the many, many teachers my children have had, I can remember only 2 who took such a sarcastic and demeaning approach. They were also the least effective teachers. The most effective were those who set high standards, but gave their students the confidence and tools to meet those standards.

[Anonymous]

I already posted. Preschool teacher here. I had another thought...the "Are you proud of this?" Is ok (and something I say it, too) BUT it has to be said in a,kind voice w/ an emphasis on "I know you can do better. Show me your BEST work. I use it as encouragement and as a motivator." Actually, the kids really respond well to this, and sometimes now they even hand me their work, and say to me " I did my best." The dynamic and social climate in my class is such that my kids KNOW that they can make endless mistakes, and it is ok. After all, that is part of learning. But the effort (and pride) needs to be there. The child needs to know the teacher cares. Almost like a partnership.

[Anonymous]

Overly sensitive. If the work was messy, it was messy. What is wrong with calling the kid on it and identifying it with pride. Heaven forbid a kid should be held accountable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Overly sensitive. If the work was messy, it was messy. What is wrong with calling the kid on it and identifying it with pride. Heaven forbid a kid should be held accountable.

What a mess! (Third sentence lacks a question mark.) Are you proud of this?

I am sorry. That was incredibly rude of me. Please forgive me.

[Anonymous]

Yeah. You guys are all So Sensitive. Why, I would be delighted as a parent if a teacher wrote on my 8 year old's homework "This really stinks. Can't you do better?" or maybe, "This is awful. Try harder, why don't you?"

Wait -- how about "What is WRONG with you, Aidan? My dog isn't even this sloppy!"

See, because it's just fine for a 'adult' educator to be a smart ass and use terse, unvarnished criticism with young children. You should have no issue with that as a parent. Duh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't BELIEVE this. Even if the page was filled with incorrect answers and smudges, this is horrible.

I taught high school, and no matter what the paper looked like, no matter the student, I would never write something like this.

Absolutely report this person.

OP here. Ok, now I'm confused by such completely different reactions. I don't think I want to report the teacher. But I do think I want to tell her that my child doesn't respond well to shaming as a teaching tactic.

NO child responds to shaming. Report the teacher. This is passive aggressive and mean-spirited. If this teacher does it to your child she/he has probably has done it in the past and will continue to do this. Report the teacher, please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't BELIEVE this. Even if the page was filled with incorrect answers and smudges, this is horrible.

I taught high school, and no matter what the paper looked like, no matter the student, I would never write something like this.

Absolutely report this person.

OP here. Ok, now I'm confused by such completely different reactions. I don't think I want to report the teacher. But I do think I want to tell her that my child doesn't respond well to shaming as a teaching tactic.

OP--you absolutely should meet with the teacher. I would use the word "shaming". That is precisely what the teacher is doing to your child. These kinds of comments can break certain children. Some kids can take it--but all the way up into MS, my kids have idolized their teachers--they would be very hurt to recieve such a criticism. They are invariably giving their best effort at any given time at school, but for my boys, sometimes the result can look quite sloppy. Some teachers can be very, very sadistic.

[Anonymous]

I am also a teacher and the comment is not appropriate. It's entirely appropriate to point out to a child that his/her work is too messy. I've done it many times. This was not the way to do it. It's not hard to write, "Your handwriting on this worksheet was very messy. It was very difficult for me to grade. Next time, please work on writing more neatly!"

Put yourself in the child's shoes. Would you want your boss to write you a note with that tone? I wouldn't. Critical feedback is necessary-- but do it respectfully.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nasty.

+1

+ 1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you are completely overreacting here. For what it is worth, I have a 3rd grader and a 6th grader in a DC private right now.

This is not "shaming" IMO it is merely pointing out the issue and asking her to think about how her work looks. That is a good thing. It is also very private: not spoken, not written on anything anyone else would see, so pretty low key and not overly aggressive. Children need to learn that the visual part of work matters, not just that it is correct.

I bet this "DC private" you speak of ^^ is technically a K-8 parochial school that is not Blessed Sacrament. Right? One of the low-tuition neighborhood Catholic schools in N.E. maybe?

No, you are absolutely incorrect. It is a top private in Washington, not a parochial school. I am actually not a fan of Catholic schools at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't BELIEVE this. Even if the page was filled with incorrect answers and smudges, this is horrible.

I taught high school, and no matter what the paper looked like, no matter the student, I would never write something like this.

Absolutely report this person.

OP here. Ok, now I'm confused by such completely different reactions. I don't think I want to report the teacher. But I do think I want to tell her that my child doesn't respond well to shaming as a teaching tactic.

NO child responds to shaming. Report the teacher. This is passive aggressive and mean-spirited. If this teacher does it to your child she/he has probably has done it in the past and will continue to do this. Report the teacher, please.

I agree too.