45 and struggling about decision to try for second child

[Anonymous]

This craziness sets unrealistic expectations for younger women.

[Anonymous]

Would you not do this "upkeep" if you didn't have kids?

Really. Check out the women walking around who are 45 yo empty nesters. Pretty put together. Now compare 45 yo with 2 teens and a ES. If you can't see the difference...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This craziness sets unrealistic expectations for younger women.

Why? Not sure I understand this comment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This craziness sets unrealistic expectations for younger women.

Why? Not sure I understand this comment.

I think the PP means that women who try to have kids in their 40s set up expectations for younger women that they can wait as long as they want to have kids. But I don't think we are all that stupid. I know what the statistics are. To each his own I say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Would you not do this "upkeep" if you didn't have kids?

Really. Check out the women walking around who are 45 yo empty nesters. Pretty put together. Now compare 45 yo with 2 teens and a ES. If you can't see the difference...

I'm not sure I understand this comment though.

[Anonymous]

I agree with an early poster that anyone at age 45 has a huge risk of having a down syndrome baby. Would it be fair to be so old and only to be around so long and then have someone else have to take care of a special needs child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with an early poster that anyone at age 45 has a huge risk of having a down syndrome baby. Would it be fair to be so old and only to be around so long and then have someone else have to take care of a special needs child?

I think a lot of people do not continue pregnancies of special needs children - regarding of parent age. I could be wrong - but from what I have heard the incidence of downs babies is down greatly. Why do you think that is?? Of course, the real question is this - and its for anyone considering pregnancy - what would you do if you conceived a child with issues. Hopefully people will think about that in advance.

[Anonymous]

I mean "regardless of parent age"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Would you not do this "upkeep" if you didn't have kids?

Really. Check out the women walking around who are 45 yo empty nesters. Pretty put together. Now compare 45 yo with 2 teens and a ES. If you can't see the difference...

I don't know any 45 yo empty nesters around here anyway. That would mean you had all your kids by the time you turned 25. Who does that around here?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Would you not do this "upkeep" if you didn't have kids?

Really. Check out the women walking around who are 45 yo empty nesters. Pretty put together. Now compare 45 yo with 2 teens and a ES. If you can't see the difference...

I don't know any 45 yo empty nesters around here anyway. That would mean you had all your kids by the time you turned 25. Who does that around here?

No one I know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Would you not do this "upkeep" if you didn't have kids?

Really. Check out the women walking around who are 45 yo empty nesters. Pretty put together. Now compare 45 yo with 2 teens and a ES. If you can't see the difference...

What's an ES?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Would you not do this "upkeep" if you didn't have kids?

Really. Check out the women walking around who are 45 yo empty nesters. Pretty put together. Now compare 45 yo with 2 teens and a ES. If you can't see the difference...

I don't know any 45 yo empty nesters around here anyway. That would mean you had all your kids by the time you turned 25. Who does that around here?

Haha, I mean the empty nester at 50 look better than the moms of teens at 45! To me, some of these moms of teenagers look very tired and worn out. Then they look better again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Would you not do this "upkeep" if you didn't have kids?

Really. Check out the women walking around who are 45 yo empty nesters. Pretty put together. Now compare 45 yo with 2 teens and a ES. If you can't see the difference...

I don't know any 45 yo empty nesters around here anyway. That would mean you had all your kids by the time you turned 25. Who does that around here?

No one I know.

I'll be 44. I'm an upper mc NW resident. There are some.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Would you not do this "upkeep" if you didn't have kids?

Really. Check out the women walking around who are 45 yo empty nesters. Pretty put together. Now compare 45 yo with 2 teens and a ES. If you can't see the difference...

I don't know any 45 yo empty nesters around here anyway. That would mean you had all your kids by the time you turned 25. Who does that around here?

No one I know.

I'll be 44. I'm an upper mc NW resident. There are some.

Me too at 44. My friends in the same boat are all educated with good jobs.

[Anonymous]

Here in Upper Caucasia, DC, if you have your second child at 45, you will NOT always be the oldest parent. Lots of families where mom has a grade school kid or two and is well into her 50s. For perspective, a mom here who had her first in her late 20s refers to herself as a "DC teen mom."