I live inside my head

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But what goes on in your alternate world? Do you imagine like actual conversations with other people? Or do you just have like a running picture of you doing something else?

It's a mix of both. It's really hard to describe. I imagine my life aka work, home, social interactions as a movie that I'm watching, and that everyone in the movie is not real, they are all just made up characters. I'm kind of oblivious to people, I look through them in a way.


Reading everything I've written, perhaps I should see a therapist but I wouldn't even know what to tell them.

So is it your exact same work, home, and social interactions that happen in real life or are they differnt in the alternate world with different people? Do you mean you are oblivious to people in your alternate world or in the real world?

I find this fascinating. I remember when I was a kid I had an imaginary friend and I used to have a whole story made up about her family etc so I think it might be the same idea.

[Anonymous]

I can identify with what a lot of you are saying! I Think I do a lot of these same thigns too!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^ yep, me too, exact same thing. It has really impacted my ability to have relationships. I have searched for narcissistic personality disorder and other disorders to try and understand it. I don't know, its bizarre. I also have a successful outer life, but I've done some dark secret messed up stuff, and I have issues with responsibility/risk that all extend from a kind of lack of self preservation, if that makes sense, or a lack of self respect -- I think because I don't really feel engaged in well anything. This said, I make a relatively large salary, am a professional, have lots of friends, and good relationships with my family, but it is hard, because it all feels superficial/as only part of me is involved in any way. The only time I feel fully "present" is when I am getting to know a new person I am excited about (friend or love interest, in the past). Then I retreat to my head. Odd, I know.

This is interesting to me. I feel like I can justify doing some weird unsafe shit..as long as it doesn't directly hurt someone else that I can see. If not for my family, I can really see myself living carelessly and dangerously. I have friends, acquaintances, etc but I don't feel fully invested in anyone or anything. For example, I can break off a multi year friendship just like that and never be phased by it. I don't share my problems with or depend on anyone for emotional support so I don't feel like I need people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But what goes on in your alternate world? Do you imagine like actual conversations with other people? Or do you just have like a running picture of you doing something else?

It's a mix of both. It's really hard to describe. I imagine my life aka work, home, social interactions as a movie that I'm watching, and that everyone in the movie is not real, they are all just made up characters. I'm kind of oblivious to people, I look through them in a way.


Reading everything I've written, perhaps I should see a therapist but I wouldn't even know what to tell them.

So is it your exact same work, home, and social interactions that happen in real life or are they differnt in the alternate world with different people? Do you mean you are oblivious to people in your alternate world or in the real world?

I find this fascinating. I remember when I was a kid I had an imaginary friend and I used to have a whole story made up about her family etc so I think it might be the same idea.

I'm oblivious to people in real life. The "people" in my alternate world are the real ones as far as I'm concerned. Alternate world have different people but that changes day to day, often times there are no people or I substitute people for different characters.
I'm sure none of this makes sense.

[Anonymous]

I wonder if we're all just strong introverts? Introverts have a pretty rich internal life. Sometimes the external world can seem like a nuisance -- or just plain more boring -- to an introvert.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if we're all just strong introverts? Introverts have a pretty rich internal life. Sometimes the external world can seem like a nuisance -- or just plain more boring -- to an introvert.

I like this thought and it seems to apply.

[Anonymous]

My family and friends have learned over the years that they have to almost shout my name to even get my attention ... you can't just go "Hey XXX, what do you think about..." you have to go "XXX! (oh?) What do you think about ..."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^ yep, me too, exact same thing. It has really impacted my ability to have relationships. I have searched for narcissistic personality disorder and other disorders to try and understand it. I don't know, its bizarre. I also have a successful outer life, but I've done some dark secret messed up stuff, and I have issues with responsibility/risk that all extend from a kind of lack of self preservation, if that makes sense, or a lack of self respect -- I think because I don't really feel engaged in well anything. This said, I make a relatively large salary, am a professional, have lots of friends, and good relationships with my family, but it is hard, because it all feels superficial/as only part of me is involved in any way. The only time I feel fully "present" is when I am getting to know a new person I am excited about (friend or love interest, in the past). Then I retreat to my head. Odd, I know.

absolutely me. i feel the same way with meeting people. I definitely have a narcissistic personality and lack filter and self preservation. I'm not sure if its a lack of self-respect. I really don't think it is.

[Anonymous]

^^^ how do you know? I was told basically that if you think you might be a narcissist, you are not, because no narcissist would ever, ever think that. They are simply incapable of thinking about their relationship with the world. But, if I am, I want help!

[Anonymous]

Well, I'm sure there are different levels of narcissism, just as with most personality "types/disorders". I'm pretty sure I am. Bc in my head, I know I am really selfish, and I only do things for people because i know I really should, but I seriously don't want to. I also don't do many things for people because I just don't want to. I really am self-centered and selfish. I know this. I try not to be, but it is my default personality.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't describe it exactly the same way, OP, but I certainly "live inside my head" a lot. I have entire conversations with people, real or imagined, and I play out scenarios of what I would do, places I'd go. I often feel that my life is what I've had to do, not what I really want to do and that no one truly knows the real me.

Maybe part of it is just my mid-life crisis Walter Mitty syndrome, but I've always had a very rich internal life since I was very young. My current "external" life - not rich at all.

[Anonymous]

I understand you OP. I don't think I am crazy but I am starting to think I could use some therapy. I compartmentalize too much and can completely separate parts of myself. I feel like I am not a coherent being but rather parts all held together. I feel like an imposter in life sometimes - that who I present as, that who people know me as is not really me. I don't fully engage in life either. I live in my head because in there there is still potential to do or be anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if we're all just strong introverts? Introverts have a pretty rich internal life. Sometimes the external world can seem like a nuisance -- or just plain more boring -- to an introvert.

I like this thought and it seems to apply.

I agree with this, although I often think the a better description for my personality is Self absorbed. I'm not shy by any means nor do I have social anxiety that is often attributed to introverts. I really just don't like being bothered with people, I tend to prefer my own company to most others.

[Anonymous]

With me, I wouldn't say it's narcissism or selfishness. Once I become aware of what someone else is wanting, or coming from, I leap to, to be a nice person, etc. It's just that I am many times too enaged in -- or fascinated by -- my inner world that I'm not putting out too many feelers to the external world, so I may not pick up on things. I"m not on the spectrum, I promise you ~ though I know it sounds like this . Reading a book about introverts really made me understand myself (and other introverts) a lot better. It was this one:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2012/mar/18/quiet-introverts-susan-cain-review

[Anonymous]

I think it's sociopathy. There are lots of sociopaths out there. You don't have to be a criminal to be one.