I want all three, but can only afford to hire one of these professionals

[Anonymous]

None, but I'd pick a house cleaner. Most therapists are worthless.

[Anonymous]

Fascinating talk on cleaning and mental health. My takeaway is that directly supporting a clean, organized household through shortcuts and outsourcing is better than therapy for many. https://youtu.be/M1O_MjMRkPg?si=DFzqjkC1SWmuH0LV

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A therapist. A clean house and a thin waistline will not make you happy. Go to therapy, find actually happiness, then worry about the other two.

Really?!?

Call me shallow, but a clean house absolutely makes me happy. Add in a thin waistline and I’m walking on air!

Same. I'm not sure being thin makes me happy, but being chubby made me incredibly unhappy. Nothing can bring me to tears faster than a dress/pants that are too tight.

Clean house is amazing!!

I'm the person who started this little mini-thread. Let me expand on my initial thought. Yes, if you're a well-functioning, generally content person and the house cleaner comes and then your house is clean, that can make you feel happy. I don't disagree with that. In fact, I have a house cleaner and I love when she comes! Money very well spent!

But - when you're talking about someone who is unhappy across the board, with everything, and is calling out two somewhat shallow, visually-based potential sources of happiness (basically, does my body look good? Does my house look good? - potentially social media driven, not very deep), while simultaneously saying she doesn't have the self motivation to fix anything herself, this tells me that something much bigger is going on. This isn't a person having a bad week who could use a pick-me-up. This is someone profoundly unhappy, who likely has some unexamined issues in her life that are just not working for her, and are dragging her whole life down.

So I think in this particular case, the causation is likely going the other way - she's unhappy, she's struggling, she's not functioning well, and so her house is a mess and she's out of shape. The way to fix that is not to clean the house and get in shape, it's to deal with the underlying issues. Someone with anxiety to the point that cleaning sounds too hard cause she might do it wrong, is not going to feel better with a clean house. Someone who is too depressed to connect well with other people is not going to feel better with a clean house. Someone who has a bad marriage isn't going to feel better with a clean house. Etc, etc, etc.

The root cause of her unhappiness is very unlikely to be a messy house or being out of shape. Treat the root cause, not the symptoms.

[Anonymous]

I have to say, getting a housecleaner did more for my happiness than I ever anticipated, and it’s somehow about half the price of my therapist.

[Anonymous]

Just get your ass up every day and walk for an hour. And hire a cleaner. Then you won’t need a therapist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another vote for house cleaner. In my experience, therapists have been minimally helpful and it’s another thing on my to-do list, another thing to pencil into a busy calendar. The only one of your options that gives you time, instead of taking it, and gets something off your plate is the house cleaner. And that’s worth it, for sure.

+1. A dirty, messy house is a daily downer.

[Anonymous]

My list in order would be:
-housecleaner
-therapist
-trainer

[Anonymous]

Housecleaner, because think about it: What do you like to do in your house?

If you're sitting down with a good book, aren't you seeing the smudgy table and feeling like you *should* get up and clean it?
If you're exhausted and turning in early, don't you see the pile of laundry in the corner of the bedroom and feel guilty you didn't deal with it already?
If you're cooking a nice meal to share with friends or family, doesn't it frustrate you to find cruddy spots everywhere you turn?

Everything you love is better when it's clean. Not only will you have more time for the things that feed your soul, you'll get more enjoyment out of them if chores aren't crowding your psyche.

[Anonymous]

Start with a cleaner. It will take time and effort to find a therapist. When you find the therapist, see if you can manage therapist + monthly cleaning. The therapist will help you prioritize.

Right now you are just overwhelmed and can’t get started. Hopefully the boost from a cleaner will give you enough energy to find a therapist.

[Anonymous]

I’m a therapist and my vote is for a house cleaner. Life changing.

[Anonymous]

Yikes - - 😱 - - this one is a real toughie but I would have to go w/regular housecleaning.

If my external surroundings were neat ➕ tidy, then I would like to think it would motivate me to tackle my other issues.
I.e., get healthier, exercise, maintain my mental health, etc.

[Anonymous]

It is very interesting to see all the different/many answers on this post.

Great topic OP!

[Anonymous]

Housecleaner, no question.

Motivation to workout comes from within and from forming a habit. Keep up a routine enough and it'll just be part of your day.

I think therapy is a joke in most instances.

[Anonymous]

Personal trainer. Worth it.

[Anonymous]

Regular house cleaner. Get outside and start walking. If you can, meet up with friends to do it. Movement is medicine.