Husband wants to take a week long trip when I’m 32 weeks pregnant

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No one has mentioned how he might feel if he missed the birth, which is unlikely.

Isn’t that on him? And not for his wife to decide?

[Anonymous]

He should go. OP should have a plan if he can't get back for the birth. Since family is close. Better.

[Anonymous]

What is 18 hours away? Australia? I’m guessing this is not super far away if he has to fly back. He should go.

[Anonymous]

You will still have two more months of pregnancy after this trip! Please tell him to go and enjoy himself. You can also safely travel at 32 weeks if you’d like to take a trip of your own.

[Anonymous]

Several posters are saying OP needs a plan if she goes into labor and he can’t get back. She has her parents but even if she did not, the plan would be “go to the hospital.” From the onset of labor to actually having the baby is likely to be much longer than 18 hours. He could get back unless it’s an all out emergency. If it’s an all out emergency, the complete plan is “get to a hospital.”

[Anonymous]

Yeah, it doesn’t sound like you’d have to make a plan for a younger child if you went into labor. I’d let him go.

[Anonymous]

Suggested backup plan: 911.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can a family member come stay over with you? How close are they?

Yes my parents are super close by - It’s easier for me to stay over with them.

I'm so tired of the 12 year olds posting here.

[Anonymous]

He goes, OP. The fact that "you don’t like to be alone and will feel lonely and bored in the week that he’ll be away" is immature. Get over it. You're going to be a parent soon. You're going to have to step-up and be a grown up.

[Anonymous]

It’s sounds like you have a very nice and supportive relationship so it should be an easy call - of course he should go!!! You are very unlikely to go into labor and you should want your DH to do something like this which will make him happy. Echoing the other posters that you feeling lonely or bored is something you need to work on for your sake and your future DCs sakes. It is definitely not a justification for making your DH miss out on this experience. Being so needy that you cannot be on your own is not healthy. How can you be bored?!? Take a walk. Read a book. Call a friend. Netflix? Come on. And don’t run to your parents’ home. You have your own home. You are about to become a mother time to start adulting.

[Anonymous]

Team “He Should Go”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to start off by saying that DH is amazing and has been incredibly supportive of me throughout this entire pregnancy (and before).

His friends have this week long fishing trip about 18 hours away from home planned that he has always wanted to go to and that he never had the opportunity to do so until two months from now- when I’ll be about 32 weeks pregnant with our first child. He asked me if I’m ok with it as I’ll be alone in our place but I do have family that will be within very short distance from me. He told me that he’s ok with skipping it if I didn’t want him to go but that this trip probably won’t happen again with the same group of people.

I’m conflicted in what to do in this situation. I honestly don’t like to be alone and I’ll feel lonely and bored in the week that he’ll be away and of course I’m worried that it is possible to give birth anytime even though it’s not a high risk pregnancy so far. At the same time I really want DH to go and enjoy this experience and I’ll feel so bad and guilty if I say no (which he’ll listen to me if I do).

What would you do in this situation?

Let him go!!
Are the friends driving or flying to this destination? You have family "super close" but won't really elaborate. What about friends? I'm having a hard time wrapping my brain around the part in bold. That seems like the root of your issue. You don't want to be alone and you think you'll be bored. Girl. Get a grip. Watch TV, order takeout, make plans with friends? You can't survive a week solo?

If the guys are driving to this destination, how about a compromise? DH goes for at least half the time and can fly back earlier if necessary.

[Anonymous]

This is a question for your doctor!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Several posters are saying OP needs a plan if she goes into labor and he can’t get back. She has her parents but even if she did not, the plan would be “go to the hospital.” From the onset of labor to actually having the baby is likely to be much longer than 18 hours. He could get back unless it’s an all out emergency. If it’s an all out emergency, the complete plan is “get to a hospital.”

Of course she goes to hospital. Someone who didn't have close family or was estranged could have a friend be with her as a labor partner, advocate for her, etc. or even have a doula.

If the "18 hours" is door to door or flight time makes a difference. Hawaii is 2 5.5 hour flights from IAD but it takes us much longer than 12 hours to get there. There have to be plane schedules to juggle. Australia you get home the date you leave and travel almost a day.
So the plan for husband may be don't panic, get home when you can and meet us!
Or it might be, finish your trip. We will be looking forward to seeing you.

[Anonymous]

That’s 8 weeks before your due date. I don’t think you should fly that far, no biggie if he does. It’s a good opportunity for you both to have solo private time before baby. Book a local hotel spa or have a good friend come visit for a few days. Go to the movies and get pedicure, massage, fancy lunch. This is a sweet time to chill as you likely have enough energy at 32 weeks to still enjoy things but also naps can happen whenever. Take a few days off.