Feel like I'm failing as a new mom

[Anonymous]

Every single new mom feels the way you do..even the ones with super chill sleepy babies (they worry they are sleeping too much!). Do whatever gets you through the day...and it will slowly get better even a bit fun before you know it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get some help if you can and call your OB and tell them how you're feeling and that you want to be screened for PPD/A.

I don’t have PPD/A. I’m just overwhelmed and exhausted.

Being overwhelmed and exhausted with one newborn who sleeps 14 hours in a 24 hour period means you probably have PPD/PPA! There is no shame in it. I had it for my first and not for my second and the difference was night and day.

My child is two weeks. He sleeps more than 14 hours. He’s a preemie who requires lot of extra care with keeping him awake for feeding, feeding every 1.5 hours, and I’m also pumping every 2-3 hours around the clock. It’s overwhelming when DH here. It will be even more overwhelming once he’s back at work.

Well, welcome to having a kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, not a preemie.

+1 lol what in the world

[Anonymous]

Sounds a lot like a tongue tie baby. They are tired because it’s so hard to eat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also, your baby is very resilient. Even if he lost a lot of weight early on, he will be fine.

This is simply not true. Losing too much weight because he ain’t eating enough can cause long term neurological and developmental defects and even starvation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So, not a preemie.

+1 lol what in the world

A 37 week old is considered a preemie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds a lot like a tongue tie baby. They are tired because it’s so hard to eat.

Not every baby with feeding issues has a tongue tie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So, not a preemie.

+1 lol what in the world

A 37 week old is considered a preemie.

Babies born before 37 weeks, not 37 weeks+

[Anonymous]

OP, my son was a preemie. We had to wake him up to feed him every three hours for at least a month. That first month I was pumping too, but it ended up not being worth it so I stopped and I'm so glad I did, it allowed me to get more rest. It was a brutal time until about two months in, when he started to sleep for five hours straight. I was so happy!

One thing to prioritize is a longer block of sleep. My H and I switched off so that both of us got at least a 5 hour stretch of sleep every day. I fed the baby before I went to sleep around 9pm. Then my H took the 11p/12a feed. The next feed would be around 2-3am...he would bring the baby to me then go to sleep himself until 7-8a. He was much better with lower amounts of sleep than I was. I also would shower during one of the baby's naps even if I wanted to sleep...I always felt better after that.

Newborns are no joke, ones who need some extra help even more so. You will get through this!

[Anonymous]

I am envious of the parents of newborns who sleep their 14 hours without being held. Mine wouldn’t fall or stay asleep without being held or, usually, swayed/bounced. Safe sleep equals no sleep for the parent with those babies.

At one point I was hallucinating from sleep deprivation, and that was with a partner who did as close to 50/50 as a father can.

Let us not speak of the newborn stage of my second, who turned out to be twins and were similar. Luckily the out-of-state grandparents came to stay and we paid for a night nurse a few days a week instead of buying a car.

[Anonymous]

What kind of extra care is he requiring?

[Anonymous]

I felt like this too. My DH actually didn’t get ANY time off. He went back to work the day after we came home from hospital. While I didn’t have a premier, my baby had colic, which is a special kind of terrible- and didn’t sleep longer than 90 min at a time for the first 5 weeks! She would breastfeed every 1.5-2 hrs, then scream until she feel asleep, wake up, nurse, cry, sleep and repeat. It was terrible.

Just remember all you need to really do is feed and cuddle your baby. That’s it. Everything else can wait until your husband gets home from work. You don’t even have to pump if it too difficult. Formula is just fine too

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So, not a preemie.

+1 lol what in the world

A 37 week old is considered a preemie.

Babies born before 37 weeks, not 37 weeks+

Op here. He came a day shy of 37 weeks. The doctors have been referring to him as a preemie. He was born at 6lbs 2oz 14% in the first week. It’s been a slow weight gain this past week. He had to stay in the hospital for 5 days and was readmitted the next day for 3 days. He is still really small and under 6lbs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am envious of the parents of newborns who sleep their 14 hours without being held. Mine wouldn’t fall or stay asleep without being held or, usually, swayed/bounced. Safe sleep equals no sleep for the parent with those babies.

At one point I was hallucinating from sleep deprivation, and that was with a partner who did as close to 50/50 as a father can.

Let us not speak of the newborn stage of my second, who turned out to be twins and were similar. Luckily the out-of-state grandparents came to stay and we paid for a night nurse a few days a week instead of buying a car.

We are thankful he does sleep in the Snoo and the halo bassinet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What kind of extra care is he requiring?

We have to feed every 1.5 hours. He will only take a small amount and his feedings take well over an hour sometimes because he’s so sleepy. He’s getting better but we are still having a lot of issues with him getting the right amount in every feed. That’s exhausting. It’s pretty much wake up at 6am, feed for 30+ minutes, and then do it all again in about 30 minutes. We sometimes stretch the feedings to 2 hours but that’s still a long process and we only get a 30-60 minutes break in between feedings. We aren’t getting any sleep.