Freshman roommate... hard liquor

[Anonymous]

The issue is that is someone drinks that and becomes ill, the roommate is implicated.
Also, simply knowing it’s there and against policy and law is enough.
I’d report that.
Dorms usually have inspections this time of year.
You will get a lot of teens that will tell you to myob etc and rude advice, but this could ruin your kids college career.

[Anonymous]

Are there kids gathering in there to do shots or is the roommate fixing himself a drink before going out for the night? Or staying in and drinking alone?

[Anonymous]

My kids can't drink for medical reasons. One takes meds that interfere with alcohol, the other has a liver issue. Unless their roommate makes the room unsafe, there's no reason to switch until the approved room switch period.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid is at a T20 and my understanding is that most kids have hard alcohol stored in their rooms for weekend drinking. Many parents actually buy it for them rather than risk having them drugged at parties (we didn't do that). And college is not like boarding school where rooms are searched for alcohol(?)

As others have said, in any event, this would be your kid's issue, not yours.

Some schools are allowed to search, some are allowed to look. My child is in a "look" dorm situation. RA can come by anytime (I think), but is not allowed to open any cabinets/frig.

[Anonymous]

OP, in what state is the college? In Virginia it's guilt by association (generalizing). It's just a different feel than say, Connecticut, where their policies revere being a good samaritan. A student wouldn't hesitate to help someone in crisis. There is no fear of guilty by association. That's my take.

[Anonymous]

Is the roommate hosting parties that are creating an issue? I think it's time for you to take a step back and let your child navigate. You are too involved. This is what going away to college is about.

[Anonymous]

I would assume most college rooms have alcohol in them…I’m not sure switching rooms is a solution unless your kid gets a single

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. My kid just said they go to the library when the roomie is drinking.

OP - if this were me, I'd be checking to see that the roommate is ok. Is roommate using the stash to just drink alone in room? Or do they bring bottles from the stash out to use at group events. These are sometimes very different things.

From what you've written, it doesn't sound like your DC is complaining about being disruptive. It does (maybe) sound like the roommate is an alcoholic (in which case I'm worried about roommate who is not disruptive but drinking alone, a lot).

But maybe I'm reading it wrong.

[Anonymous]

I have never heard of a college dorm room inspection and have had 2 kids graduate from college. Inspections didn’t even exist when I was in college and I am OLD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depending on the state, the roommate will catch a charge too.

No one is calling the police on college dorm rooms having alcohol. A party out of control - yes? A bottle of Vodka in Kayla's room? - no

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have never heard of a college dorm room inspection and have had 2 kids graduate from college. Inspections didn’t even exist when I was in college and I am OLD.

My daughter is at VCU, and they do have room inspections. But the RA inspectors do not open closets, desks, or dressers. They are looking for physical safety issues - neon signs, that over heat and explode, very dirty rooms (creating a hazard), hot plates, unattended flat irons and things like that.

They are not the police trying to do an alcohol or drug raid.

[Anonymous]

My son's school has sober housing.

If drinking/alcohol makes your son uncomfortable, that might be an option. You could look into that without admonishing the other student.

"Hey. Just not my thing. I focus better knowing I don't have to encounter alcohol or people who used it. Good luck!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think this really depends on the context. Is this High Point? Some school with an Honor Code that requires reporting? A school that actually expels all students if they find alcohol? I'm not denying there are a handful of these schools; if so, protect your kid.

If you're at a normal school? Ignore unless it actually creates an issue for your kid. I cannot tell you how high the percentage of kids that have some alcohol in their dorms is at my kid's "normal" school.

This. It depends on the school. If they threw out everyone who had alcohol in their room freshman year at my kid's school, there wouldn't be anyone left.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are the kids 21?

Right? All the cool parents defending kids who won't follow the rules.

Just stop with the "cool parents." It's not "cool" but realistic that many college kids drink. And if they don't, which is FINE, they are in college and can be expected to be around things/activities/people they don't like, don't agree with, etc. That's part of what college is.

You're little snowflake will survive being around kids who drink before they are 21.

It's about hard liquor in a dorm where the legal drinking age is 21 and alcohol is against the rules? Stay cool mommy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would assume most college rooms have alcohol in them…I’m not sure switching rooms is a solution unless your kid gets a single

You are wrong. This is highly college dependent. Not all college students are rule breaking alcoholics. This is a bid deal at alot more schools than some of you seem to realize.

OP, can you name the school?