Drop the guilt over teen being lazy?
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Anonymous
Can I ask why? This was our mother. She made us get up for no particular reason, other than she was up so everyone must be up. We were tired, why couldn’t we just sleep another hour as opposed to getting up and watching The Price Is Right, or whatever. I am a parent now and never force waking when we have no plans. What is the point? Is it a control thing? What benefit do you think you are providing? |
Anonymous
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Drop the guilt.
Not actually sure what there is to feel guilty about but let it go. |
Anonymous
| Do you also engage in negative self-talk about yourself OP, or is it just your kid that you need to denigrate? |
Anonymous
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I would not be ok with my kid gaming or surfing the dark web until 4 am. Nothing good comes of internet use in the middle of the night. If that is why they are sleeping past 1 pm, then no, not ok.
If they are going to bed at a reasonable hour (I’d say before 12:30am) and want to sleep in, sure. |
Anonymous
DP - my DH is like this too, expectation that everyone is up by 9am. Unless they have to be up to their jobs by then (and one doesn't), why? I think with him it's a control thing and because his mother was like that. |
Anonymous
| We are all night owls and our 2 kids ages 14 and 12 really don't sleep till 1130/midnight. When we have no commitments, 10a is our standard wake time. Without loading their camps this wk it's a lot of 1030a! I think my older ones really sleeps better around 1a or so and given he's getting 9-10 hrs asleep I'm all good with that. My kids are travel sports kids so def this is not yr round. I feel a bit weird that they start their day at lunch but DH and I are also such people so I try to remind myself this is only summer days when we aren't packed schedule wise as we are during rest of year! |
Anonymous
| Past 1pm? No. 10, 11 sure. |
Anonymous
PP - It's not just a control thing. But if one person in the family is getting up 7 hours later than the others, when is lunch happening? Dinner? As other posters have said, what is happening at 3am when the kid is awake and everyone else is asleep? It just isn't healthy from a family perspective. |
Anonymous
My kid sleeps late, skips breakfast and we eat lunch together, nbd |
Anonymous
Same. Or they have cereal while I have a salad. Why are you controlling food, PP? |
Anonymous
Gaming, eating, tiktoking, solving world peace |
Anonymous
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I don’t let my teen sleep past noon but that’s bc she has a job on most weekdays where she starts at 830 (sometimes 730) and I don’t want her internal clock to get too wonky. Because she will end up in a cycle of too little sleep.
Plus - if a teen wants to go swim and get some sun, and enjoy the summer, can’t really go do that if you sleep in too much. My 14 yo has never slept past 10 in her life, just how she is. am a night owl and slept in as a teen and so I don’t think getting up early somehow is more virtuous like many do. |
Anonymous
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I remember sleeping into the early afternoon when I was a teen if I had nowhere I needed to be. My parents didn’t bug me about it. I managed to become a productive adult.
I don’t bother my kids about it unless they have responsibilities. If my 15 year old misses lunch, he can handle it. |
Anonymous
| If they are reading until 2am and sleeping until noon I’d be like whatever. If they are on the internet or gaming I wouldn’t allow it. Screens off by 10pm |
Anonymous
| I make breakfast (if they want it) and dinner. For lunch everyone is on their own. |