Feeling terrible for not bringing a gift to a no gifts party when others did

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think you should feel bad at all.

Agree. No one but you cares. The parents to do not, I promise

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The invitation requested no gifts please and I did just that. DS showed up without an actual gift. Other guests arrived with gifts. Maybe 2 people that I noticed actually did not bring a gift.

In the future, if it says no gifts, do I need to bring a gift?

My kids have had no gift parties since they were 6. Don’t feel bad. They really and truly don’t want gifts, even though many people won’t believe it. We have had about 16-17 no gift parties, and I don’t remember who gave gifts and who didn’t. I do remember some nice cards though, which we kept.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We usually take a card and maybe put some stickers, erasers, or a keychain in the envelope.

Please do NOT do this. Gifts mean no gifts. Do you really think parents need more clutter and junk like stickers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a similar experience, and I bring gifts to a no gifts party. The parents will deal.

Let them donate it or throw it in the trash.

I just don't understand this sentiment -- in this case, you are giving a gift because it makes you feel superior. So your gift giving is not even about the birthday child, it's about you and your superiority complex. How is that good? It's selfish and wasteful. If I knew someone like you, I'd give this right back to your kid at their birthday.

I don't care. You can give it back if you wish. It's selfish to keep requesting no gifts when it creates awkwardness where there shouldn't be.
People always bring gifts and it makes some of these who don't feel terrible.

If you were not selfish and self centered, you'd accept whenever you get and donate it. You'd stop requesting no gifts when you are well aware that this is not the cultural norm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We usually take a card and maybe put some stickers, erasers, or a keychain in the envelope.

Please do NOT do this. Gifts mean no gifts. Do you really think parents need more clutter and junk like stickers?

Most kids don't need pizza and candy and juice that most people offer at parties. It does not stop people from offering them. Put the junk in the trash and be graceful. That's what I do with most party favors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just do a card. No gifts means parents don’t want gifts. I think the people who bring them are rude.

+1. I believe in respecting other people's wishes.

A card is a gift...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just do a card. No gifts means parents don’t want gifts. I think the people who bring them are rude.

+1. I believe in respecting other people's wishes.

A card is a gift...

Not by itself. It is a greeting.

[Anonymous]

Carry an Amazon gift card in your purse, and put it in the birthday greeting card if you need to. This is not a big problem.

Don't most parents carry several blank greeting cards, checkbook and pen in their car glove compartment especially if they have young children for just these kinds of situations?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Carry an Amazon gift card in your purse, and put it in the birthday greeting card if you need to. This is not a big problem.

Don't most parents carry several blank greeting cards, checkbook and pen in their car glove compartment especially if they have young children for just these kinds of situations?

No. I keep bandaids, sunscreen and tissues. Definitely not a blank checkbook.

[Anonymous]

The people saying to bring a gift bc it can be donated….NO! I told you not to bring a gift, you don’t get to then assign me a chore. If you can’t follow directions, don’t come.

[Anonymous]

I went to a party and the parent said to bring something for the food bank. I thought this was a good idea. No one brought a gift for the kid, but it's weird to show up empty handed (although I do if it's requested).

[Anonymous]

^ I mean my kid went to a birthday party

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The people saying to bring a gift bc it can be donated….NO! I told you not to bring a gift, you don’t get to then assign me a chore. If you can’t follow directions, don’t come.

I don't buy it. You're just mad because your kid is going to get excited about the gifts and you're going to have to be some kind of Grinch and deal with it. Learn to be a gracious host. Not everyone is going to bother reading the find print.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a similar experience, and I bring gifts to a no gifts party. The parents will deal.

Let them donate it or throw it in the trash.

I just don't understand this sentiment -- in this case, you are giving a gift because it makes you feel superior. So your gift giving is not even about the birthday child, it's about you and your superiority complex. How is that good? It's selfish and wasteful. If I knew someone like you, I'd give this right back to your kid at their birthday.

I don't care. You can give it back if you wish. It's selfish to keep requesting no gifts when it creates awkwardness where there shouldn't be.
People always bring gifts and it makes some of these who don't feel terrible.

If you were not selfish and self centered, you'd accept whenever you get and donate it. You'd stop requesting no gifts when you are well aware that this is not the cultural norm.

wut

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We usually take a card and maybe put some stickers, erasers, or a keychain in the envelope.

Yes, a card with some stickers is a great alternative. That way you're not empty handed, but still abiding by the no gifts rule. If not stickers, try something else that will get used up and not take up space in the host's house.