My girlfriend is mean to her daughter and it makes me uncomfortable

[Anonymous]

You have stated you are uncomfortable. Someone needs to stand up for this child. Why can’t you be the one?

[Anonymous]

I guess I'm going to dissent here. I can sympathize with the girlfriend, my 7 year old is like that. Incredibly difficult personality since birth; complains about everything. It can wear you down. If my kid is being bratty/snooty, I have no problem calling him out on it. My second is NOT like that so I don't think it's me or my parenting. She's probably just venting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She'll say mean things about how annoying or bratty she is to me, but also in front of the little girl. When she does things for her, she'll complain about how much they cost and that her daughter doesn't appreciate them. She's only six and seems like a really sweet kid but my girlfriend claims I don't realize how awful she is. Everything else is great. When we go out if i can get her off the topic of complaining about the girl, we have a great time.

Is this from The Troll?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess I'm going to dissent here. I can sympathize with the girlfriend, my 7 year old is like that. Incredibly difficult personality since birth; complains about everything. It can wear you down. If my kid is being bratty/snooty, I have no problem calling him out on it. My second is NOT like that so I don't think it's me or my parenting. She's probably just venting.

+1.

You’ve met the daughter a couple times. Your girlfriend sounds exhausted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should leave her. And you should tell her why.

This times a million.
Can the dad get custody? This child is at risk for abuse by the next BF who agrees with her. Heartbreaking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess I'm going to dissent here. I can sympathize with the girlfriend, my 7 year old is like that. Incredibly difficult personality since birth; complains about everything. It can wear you down. If my kid is being bratty/snooty, I have no problem calling him out on it. My second is NOT like that so I don't think it's me or my parenting. She's probably just venting.

Do you vent about your child to people who aren't your spouse? If so, you're coming across poorly to them, even if you don't realize it.

A lot of us have had kids who go through difficult, whining periods, sometimes years of it. That doesn't mean we talk about them to people like the GF is talking to the OP. Oh, and if you've characterized your child in your mind as always difficult and think she always will be difficult, she's likely to live down to your expectations, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should leave her. And you should tell her why.

This times a million.
Can the dad get custody? This child is at risk for abuse by the next BF who agrees with her. Heartbreaking.

The bold is a very good point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She sounds like an awful person.

Except for this one thing, she is really awesome. She's funny and kind and interesting. I like her a lot except for this. I try to defend her daughter when she says mean things about her, but I've only met the kid a couple of times and don't know her well so it's hard.

She is NOT KIND. That poor child will be damaged for much of her life because of this type of cruel treatment from her own mother (not to mention what she says and does to the child when no one is around). A parent's job is to love their child unconditionally. Sadly, you are not able to be of support to that very unfortunate child.
You already know what to do with this relationship.

I meant she's kind to other people. Like she helped a friend who was moving to unpack, held the door for an old couple, and she brought me soup when I was sick. Stuff like that.

She talks shit about a child she brought into this world and who she is raising. Think about that for a minute...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mother was this awful. So was my stepfather. Only a horrible man would be with a woman horrible enough to treat a small child this way. Anyone else would be disgusted and run like hell.

Do you wish your mother had stayed single? Or maybe married a nice man who was better to you than your mother?

Only pos would marry a woman like her mother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess I'm going to dissent here. I can sympathize with the girlfriend, my 7 year old is like that. Incredibly difficult personality since birth; complains about everything. It can wear you down. If my kid is being bratty/snooty, I have no problem calling him out on it. My second is NOT like that so I don't think it's me or my parenting. She's probably just venting.

It's 100% your parenting. You do not like the child who challenges you. Keep at it and you will scapegoat her into submission. She will go on to date men who treat her like shit and maybe even beat her. Your other child, who does not challenge you is your golden child. You are doing a number on him, too. Future narcissist alert on that one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have stated you are uncomfortable. Someone needs to stand up for this child. Why can’t you be the one?

+1

NP here. I actually think that the situation can be both - GF is tired, and kid can be difficult. GF needs to be the adult here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess I'm going to dissent here. I can sympathize with the girlfriend, my 7 year old is like that. Incredibly difficult personality since birth; complains about everything. It can wear you down. If my kid is being bratty/snooty, I have no problem calling him out on it. My second is NOT like that so I don't think it's me or my parenting. She's probably just venting.

It's 100% your parenting. You do not like the child who challenges you. Keep at it and you will scapegoat her into submission. She will go on to date men who treat her like shit and maybe even beat her. Your other child, who does not challenge you is your golden child. You are doing a number on him, too. Future narcissist alert on that one.

+1

Well said.

[Anonymous]

BOLD RED FLAGS MY GUY, RUN!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should leave her. And you should tell her why.

This times a million.
Can the dad get custody? This child is at risk for abuse by the next BF who agrees with her. Heartbreaking.

Why the GF stands there and watches it and allows it. Ask me how I know!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should leave her. And you should tell her why.

This times a million.
Can the dad get custody? This child is at risk for abuse by the next BF who agrees with her. Heartbreaking.

Why the GF stands there and watches it and allows it. Ask me how I know!!!!

I'm sorry for what you've gone through. Mothers are supposed to love and protect their kids, not disparage and abuse them. I'm starting to sense that op is detecting an opportunity here.