Is this normal? Tween not liking parent’s hometown

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Eh, we don't all get the perfect summer sometimes. It's ok. Your kid will survive a few weeks of their "less than ideal" summer vacation.

But every year? Because that’s what this is.

OP, what is important to you about your tween spending every summer in Munich? Is your kid vowing to never visit Munich again after they have a choice worth it?


Sleep away camp, even one or two weeks staying over at a friend’s house and travelling on their own can make a difference. Their friends are planning to watch movies, meet at the pool, and missing out on EVERY part of that EVERY year is a bummer. We did every other year to my parent’s country as a kid.

[Anonymous]

Can he invite along a friend, at least for part of the time? The logistics would be challenging but it might really improve his outlook.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like you have one teen who likes travel and new experiences, and one tween who just wants to stay home with their friends all summer. Has nothing to do with "home town".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Uh yes, and many of us are from hometowns far less interesting than Munich Germany.

+1

And here I thought the thread would be about the parents' hometown being small, rural, and with nothing to do but watch the [insert crop] grow (or have to be there to help harvest it).

But I suppose the "hometown" doesn't really matter, except that it's not the tween's hometown.

And tweens and teens complain about most everything (yes I know some of you have raised impeccable, smart, easy, always agreeable humans - yay you).

This age really like a lot of boring summers like we had in the 70-80s. They want to sleep in, stay up late, act stupid with friends, veg out in front of the tv or at the pool. They do not want to spend time at Grandma's house, or your summer home. Even if there is a lot of things to do and see. They are contraire.

[Anonymous]

I would enroll him in a full-time German course. Then at least he'll be learning something worthwhile, and maybe it will help him have a better time.

It could be that the German kids your older child's age are better able to make friends with someone from away, either their English is better or they're more socially adept or more open to new experiences. When I was a kid our area (lake town in VT) had tons of "summer people" and in middle school we weren't very interested in them, but as we matured we saw the value in interacting with new people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm from Germany and my family goes every year. Different large city.

Do your kids speak German? Have friends or access to other kids their age? What are their interests? Ours like it and go happily every year. Munich is great, plenty to do.

What did he say he doesn't like?

They both speak German, but the younger one doesn’t have friends. The older one 2-3 friends she met through her sport. The younger one refuses to do anything like camp and sports classes. I offered sailing, tennis, riding. Answer is no. Relatives and children of friends don’t match up age-wise.

Sounds like a typical tween- needs friends but is unwilling to take the steps required to make them. Many kids are like this, including one of mine.

[Anonymous]

My 12 year old could be happy on a trip like that, just being in a new place. My 9 year old would climb the walls and be bored out of her skull without friends her age and freedom to be on her own like she has in our neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We also go to Munich every year and my tween hates it. He would prefer to stay home for the summer.

It would be perfect if you and OP could meet up and introduce your DCs to each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm from Germany and my family goes every year. Different large city.

Do your kids speak German? Have friends or access to other kids their age? What are their interests? Ours like it and go happily every year. Munich is great, plenty to do.

What did he say he doesn't like?

They both speak German, but the younger one doesn’t have friends. The older one 2-3 friends she met through her sport. The younger one refuses to do anything like camp and sports classes. I offered sailing, tennis, riding. Answer is no. Relatives and children of friends don’t match up age-wise.

It's an age thing. My parents live in London, and my teen DS spent most of the time we visited last summer in his bedroom, on the computer.

Does your younger child participate in classes and sports at home?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would enroll him in a full-time German course. Then at least he'll be learning something worthwhile, and maybe it will help him have a better time.

It could be that the German kids your older child's age are better able to make friends with someone from away, either their English is better or they're more socially adept or more open to new experiences. When I was a kid our area (lake town in VT) had tons of "summer people" and in middle school we weren't very interested in them, but as we matured we saw the value in interacting with new people.

No way

They will hate doing Summer school In Germany! Are you crazy.

And most people in German courses over there are refugees/Turks/Syrians/Islamic if you get my drift which they’ll hate even more since they are tweens and want to be with young people that they have things In common with or attracted to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My hometown is Paris, and none of us are in love with it, but we visit to see my parents. I try to make it fun by scheduling visits of sites they won't object to, but really all they want to do is restaurant-hop and sit around my parents' apartment reading all the Tintins and Asterix.

I'm offering myself for adoption.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm from Germany and my family goes every year. Different large city.

Do your kids speak German? Have friends or access to other kids their age? What are their interests? Ours like it and go happily every year. Munich is great, plenty to do.

What did he say he doesn't like?

They both speak German, but the younger one doesn’t have friends. The older one 2-3 friends she met through her sport. The younger one refuses to do anything like camp and sports classes. I offered sailing, tennis, riding. Answer is no. Relatives and children of friends don’t match up age-wise.

So that's why she doesn't like it. She doesn't have friends or cousins, it's not fun for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm from Germany and my family goes every year. Different large city.

Do your kids speak German? Have friends or access to other kids their age? What are their interests? Ours like it and go happily every year. Munich is great, plenty to do.

What did he say he doesn't like?

They both speak German, but the younger one doesn’t have friends. The older one 2-3 friends she met through her sport. The younger one refuses to do anything like camp and sports classes. I offered sailing, tennis, riding. Answer is no. Relatives and children of friends don’t match up age-wise.

Sounds like a typical tween- needs friends but is unwilling to take the steps required to make them. Many kids are like this, including one of mine.

What about a non-sports camp?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would enroll him in a full-time German course. Then at least he'll be learning something worthwhile, and maybe it will help him have a better time.

It could be that the German kids your older child's age are better able to make friends with someone from away, either their English is better or they're more socially adept or more open to new experiences. When I was a kid our area (lake town in VT) had tons of "summer people" and in middle school we weren't very interested in them, but as we matured we saw the value in interacting with new people.

No way

They will hate doing Summer school In Germany! Are you crazy.

And most people in German courses over there are refugees/Turks/Syrians/Islamic if you get my drift which they’ll hate even more since they are tweens and want to be with young people that they have things In common with or attracted to.

Of course he will hate it. Offer him the choice of summer school or stopping whining.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eh, we don't all get the perfect summer sometimes. It's ok. Your kid will survive a few weeks of their "less than ideal" summer vacation.

But every year? Because that’s what this is.

OP, what is important to you about your tween spending every summer in Munich? Is your kid vowing to never visit Munich again after they have a choice worth it?


Sleep away camp, even one or two weeks staying over at a friend’s house and travelling on their own can make a difference. Their friends are planning to watch movies, meet at the pool, and missing out on EVERY part of that EVERY year is a bummer. We did every other year to my parent’s country as a kid.

Meh. I went to my parents' hometown every summer, all summer, except for the last year or so of high school when I did about half. I loved it. Your kid needs to make friends in this new place.