People in Inappropriate Relationships: How did it start?

[Anonymous]

I definitely had a strong mutual attraction to a coworker. We never acted on it and no longer even live in the same area (and haven’t worked together in 15 years.) But I can see how things could get out of hand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:His trainer almost 20 years younger

He did

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can see how these situations build up, but I just can’t ever see myself pulling the trigger on that first kiss.

You have no idea.

I suppose I don’t.

[Anonymous]

We are coworkers but work in different locations. We met when we were assigned to work on the same project and started chatting daily, first the conversation was strictly about work and then flirting/banter started. This continued for months and one day we met for lunch when I was visiting his location and he gave me a hug goodbye that made both of us feel something. That scared us both and for a few weeks we kept chats strictly work and didn’t even speak for a couple of weeks. We saw each other on the next business trip and the attraction was even stronger and he kissed me. That’s how it started and we have been together for a year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are coworkers but work in different locations. We met when we were assigned to work on the same project and started chatting daily, first the conversation was strictly about work and then flirting/banter started. This continued for months and one day we met for lunch when I was visiting his location and he gave me a hug goodbye that made both of us feel something. That scared us both and for a few weeks we kept chats strictly work and didn’t even speak for a couple of weeks. We saw each other on the next business trip and the attraction was even stronger and he kissed me. That’s how it started and we have been together for a year.

Those business trips are something else!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He was my therapist. For years. He knew me inside out.

wow, this is so wrong. did you report him?

in answer to OP’s question - a lot of the “inappropriate” relationships are abusive or involve a big disparity in power.

And grooming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Affairs mostly happen with working women. Its called having proximity and opportunity.

[Anonymous]

I’m an attractive woman in my mid 40s and was a model in my teens and 20s. I’ve traveled for work all over the globe for 20+ years. I’ve never experienced or seen anything fishy going on. There was one US based coworker who was rumored to have a second family in a country where we worked but it was never confirmed nor did he behave oddly on trips. I honestly think all this business trip affair talk is hugely overblown. But if it isn’t, I am grateful to have remained ignorant all this time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m an attractive woman in my mid 40s and was a model in my teens and 20s. I’ve traveled for work all over the globe for 20+ years. I’ve never experienced or seen anything fishy going on. There was one US based coworker who was rumored to have a second family in a country where we worked but it was never confirmed nor did he behave oddly on trips. I honestly think all this business trip affair talk is hugely overblown. But if it isn’t, I am grateful to have remained ignorant all this time.

I wonder what kind of variation by business type there might be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m an attractive woman in my mid 40s and was a model in my teens and 20s. I’ve traveled for work all over the globe for 20+ years. I’ve never experienced or seen anything fishy going on. There was one US based coworker who was rumored to have a second family in a country where we worked but it was never confirmed nor did he behave oddly on trips. I honestly think all this business trip affair talk is hugely overblown. But if it isn’t, I am grateful to have remained ignorant all this time.

It depends on the type of business trip and business. Tradeshows are notorious for hookups because you have so many people together and usually a lot of drinking/social events into the night.

[Anonymous]

PP here. My DH and I both work in corporate sales and we both used to do lots of the HUGE tradeshows/conferences. Lots of sketchy stuff.

[Anonymous]

Also there are some management consulting companies that send people on the road in pairs.

[Anonymous]

I was 17, he was in his mid 30s (he was single). It was fun initially but he was bogged down in angst and guilt about the age difference, which became tiresome, so I ended it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was 17, he was in his mid 30s (he was single). It was fun initially but he was bogged down in angst and guilt about the age difference, which became tiresome, so I ended it.

How did it get started? You come on to him or did he come on to you?

[Anonymous]

Not me but one of my best friends. He DM'd her on Instagram and they started talking daily.