Why do people think you have to spend so much on your kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honest question meant without snark - what is 2k/year saved going to do for them? Are you planning on funding the rest of their college education? They won’t get aid with parents who have a 400k HHI, right?

When you have that level of income you don’t need savings. You can just pay as you go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I bet OP is the type of parent who will refuse to fill out the FAFSA so they can even get loans.

Hope you’re happy when your kids are working $11/hour jobs for the rest of their lives. It’s brutal out there without a BA.

My parents did that and no one even believes me!

I was self pay at the full scale at a community college and couldn't even make it work between my full-time job and commuting to my far-flung apartment with a roommate (with a baby!) and holding my own car insurance policy which my parents insisted upon when I turned 16 and got a license. My car insurance alone was like $320 month. From ages 16 until 21 when it finally dropped.

What is even worse is that none of these rules applied for my sibling. The opposite, in fact.

I have been considering starting my own thread asking for advice as I'm back to square one at 40 yo after a nasty divorce. Things have not been easy and it's often felt as if the cards were stacked against me from the start.

I have no relationship with my parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids don’t want to do rec soccer. They want to dance, do gymnastics, ride horses, take piano lessons, and play volleyball. They don’t want to go to cheap summer camp - they want to go to performing arts camps and travel camps, and tennis camps, etc.

I’m glad that your children are happy. My children have different interests. More expensive interests.

Help your local poor black or Latino neighbor realizes this dream for their kids too. I'm sure you under pay somewhere to save for your kids costs.

Why would you assume we don't already help out? We don't help based on race, but based on income.

[Anonymous]

You sound exhausting OP. Good luck with everything......

[Anonymous]

Here’s hoping OP’s kids stick them in the crappiest home they can find when the time comes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question meant without snark - what is 2k/year saved going to do for them? Are you planning on funding the rest of their college education? They won’t get aid with parents who have a 400k HHI, right?

When you have that level of income you don’t need savings. You can just pay as you go.

OP said she refuses to do that.

[Anonymous]

What’s the point of earning that kind of money if you’re not going to use it to support your children? Why would you send them to community college and burden them with loans? That’s ludicrous.

[Anonymous]

SANCTIMOMMY ALERT

SANCTIMOMMY ALERT

SANCTIMOMMY ALERT

SANCTIMOMMY ALERT

SANCTIMOMMY ALERT

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have 2 kids, we live in a 3 br townhouse in an exurb that has a 1400/mo mortgage, we send them to public school and we only save $2000 per year per kid for their college while having a 400k HHI. Rec soccer, cheap city summer camps. I don’t believe that you are morally obligated to financially strain yourself just to give your kids what society thinks is the ideal life. Our kids are very happy and don’t feel like they’re deprived from what I can tell.

Some of us can spend a lot on our children without financially straining ourselves #sorrynotsorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have 2 kids, we live in a 3 br townhouse in an exurb that has a 1400/mo mortgage, we send them to public school and we only save $2000 per year per kid for their college while having a 400k HHI. Rec soccer, cheap city summer camps. I don’t believe that you are morally obligated to financially strain yourself just to give your kids what society thinks is the ideal life. Our kids are very happy and don’t feel like they’re deprived from what I can tell.

Boring life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have 2 kids, we live in a 3 br townhouse in an exurb that has a 1400/mo mortgage, we send them to public school and we only save $2000 per year per kid for their college while having a 400k HHI. Rec soccer, cheap city summer camps. I don’t believe that you are morally obligated to financially strain yourself just to give your kids what society thinks is the ideal life. Our kids are very happy and don’t feel like they’re deprived from what I can tell.

We live in a close-in neighborhood in an excellent school district. Our house has more than doubled in value since we bought, much more than we could have saved. You don’t sound financially savvy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids don’t want to do rec soccer. They want to dance, do gymnastics, ride horses, take piano lessons, and play volleyball. They don’t want to go to cheap summer camp - they want to go to performing arts camps and travel camps, and tennis camps, etc.

I’m glad that your children are happy. My children have different interests. More expensive interests.

Hopefully their more expensive interests include supporting you in retirement.

[Anonymous]

You can’t take it with you. Since I have the money, why not spend it on my kids, especially, their education & interests?

What else are you doing with your money? Generation-skipping trust?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids don’t want to do rec soccer. They want to dance, do gymnastics, ride horses, take piano lessons, and play volleyball. They don’t want to go to cheap summer camp - they want to go to performing arts camps and travel camps, and tennis camps, etc.

I’m glad that your children are happy. My children have different interests. More expensive interests.

Hopefully their more expensive interests include supporting you in retirement.

Some of us make enough to give our kids whatever they want and save for our own needs too. No need to be jealous if you can’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have 2 kids, we live in a 3 br townhouse in an exurb that has a 1400/mo mortgage, we send them to public school and we only save $2000 per year per kid for their college while having a 400k HHI. Rec soccer, cheap city summer camps. I don’t believe that you are morally obligated to financially strain yourself just to give your kids what society thinks is the ideal life. Our kids are very happy and don’t feel like they’re deprived from what I can tell.

Wow, OP, you are super duper! The best mom ever! Thanks for telling us all about you!!