Attending bachelorette parties as a new mom

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go to both if you want to. Baby will be fine and DH should have no problem - in fact, could be a great experience for them to bond. My baby is six months and I’ve been away on four trips already. All have been great!

If you don’t want to go, that’s fine too but by 8 months, baby is not a great excuse.

It wasn’t something that stopped you. For OP and others, an infant is a legitimate reason not to want to go on a trip.

+1

Eight months old? I wouldn't want to leave the baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can definitely do it. But I'm like you. Both would feel like too much to me. I'd skip the international trip.

Same. I went to my sister's bachelorette when my DS was 4 months I think? It was fine and of course I had to go but pumping on travel is a PITA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you rich or something? This seems so pointless to me. Sure you could make it work but why would you? Id skip both and save that money for actual fun.

Girlfriends, how do they work?

Hmm must be a rich thing then. Gotcha.

Weekend away bachelorette parties are very common in certain socioeconomic classes yes. Honestly I think it’s spread beyond more wealthy classes. Nashville is FULL of them. Charleston too. Any cities with fun night life and drinking. All of my friends did it and I find it to be wayyyy too much. It’s sooo much money to often hang out with a mixed group of folks who you aren’t close with all of them. That being said I have gone to most as it’s important to my friends and definitely would be hurtful if I never came. I can technically afford it though I would prefer to put that money elsewhere and have a more low key party

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Leave your DH out of the equation. He can handle one baby over the weekend.

Go if YOU want to go. I do not do destination bachelorette parties and didn’t do them when I was single. I set a wedding budget for being a bridesmaid, and destination parties don’t fit in them. Go, or don’t go, but don’t feel guilty for whatever choice you make.

+1. I'm single with no kids and I don't do destination bachelorette parties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Leave your DH out of the equation. He can handle one baby over the weekend.

Go if YOU want to go. I do not do destination bachelorette parties and didn’t do them when I was single. I set a wedding budget for being a bridesmaid, and destination parties don’t fit in them. Go, or don’t go, but don’t feel guilty for whatever choice you make.

+1. I'm single with no kids and I don't do destination bachelorette parties.

+2

I traveled (for work) the first time when my first kid was 8 months - it was such a great trip. But this just sounds like a PITA. Go if you want to, don't go if you don't.

[Anonymous]

It's doable. I did a few girls' weekends when I had a EBF baby at home. But the international trip sounds like a lot. With COVID these days and flights being cancelled etc., I would be really nervous to be so far away. I'd probably do the domestic trip but not the international one.

[Anonymous]

Truly, go if you want to go, and if you don’t want to go, don’t. Go to one, go to both, skip both. I went to a bachelorette party when my first kid was four months old, and a girls’ trip when he had just turned one, and they were wonderful. They were years ago and I remember them fondly. I’m sure I had some guilt but I don’t remember any of that now. I wanted to go, I made the choice, and I went. If I didn’t want to go, I wouldn’t have and I probably wouldn’t think twice about this.

Don’t overthink this. (I’m saying that gently, not with judgment).

[Anonymous]

My daughter is 12 months and I’ve traveled for work a few times. My husband does fine, but is exhausted. Even if you have an “easy baby” they are just a lot of physical work at this age. I find it very tiring to prepare for my trips and am always sneaking off to pump and dealing with milk logistics. It you feel like you’d really want to be there, go for it. But don’t feel bad about staying home to rest!

[Anonymous]

Don't martyr yourself. Go if you think you will have a good time.

[Anonymous]

I’m surprised so many people leave such young babies. I traveled with my 8 month old and my husband for a wedding, but would never have traveled without them.

[Anonymous]

I had a work trip and a wedding at 8 months and it is doable but requires a lot of planning imo. Pumping is no joke and is time consuming/awkward depending on the flights, activities, etc. You might not still be pumping at 8 months though.

[Anonymous]

I’m envious of all the moms on this thread who have babies who would be ok being left. Mine is 14 months and can’t even be put to bed by anyone else and cries for me if she sees me in the house and I don’t hold her. She would not have been ok if I’d left her at 8 months.

But if I felt she would be, I absolutely would go on a trip!!! Enjoy a break if you can!

[Anonymous]

Go o! The trips! Have fun!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m envious of all the moms on this thread who have babies who would be ok being left. Mine is 14 months and can’t even be put to bed by anyone else and cries for me if she sees me in the house and I don’t hold her. She would not have been ok if I’d left her at 8 months.

But if I felt she would be, I absolutely would go on a trip!!! Enjoy a break if you can!

Then OP shouldn’t follow your advice. That’s ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

I went on an international bachelorette when my DD was 9 months old, it was so fun and I’m so glad I went
I wouldn’t go in two trips though , that just sounds overwhelming

Also, pump while you are away, but don’t assume your milk will make it back with you.