What makes a 50+ year old woman think that she looks 25? Serious question.

[Anonymous]

I believe old people say this to other old people (you look younger) because they have lost perspective on what young people look like. It’s another way of saying you look great for your age. And people know other people love to hear this. Why not say it.

When I see 20-something’s and early 30-somethings now they look like babies. Sorry ladies when we are 50+ we do not look like them. Even freaking J Lo does not look like them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think I look in my 20’s but I’ve been mistaken to be a younger person many times.

I’m 54 and people assume I’m in my 30’s.

I don’t see it personally.

How does this ever come up in your life? I’m curious. How do you have a 20 year old when you are 35? That type of thing?

In my social circles no one is guessing or commenting on anyone’s age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 48 and look 48 and even if I thought I looked younger and young guys were hitting on me I would have enough self-awareness to realize that’s at best a boring self-involved topic of conversation for others and at worst, a mortifying and possibly delusional thing to say.

The types of people that say things like this, it’s a symptom of a larger problem which is their clueless and cringe personality.

Op here, this!! This is what I think I was getting at but couldn't properly articulate. What would make you say it, even if you think it?? It's weird, vain, and worse totally inaccurate. One even pulled out her ID when she ordered her drink. The waiter did not ask for it, but politely checked it. He could look at the age spots on your hands and know you are old enough to drink, Marcy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am 48 and look 48 and even if I thought I looked younger and young guys were hitting on me I would have enough self-awareness to realize that’s at best a boring self-involved topic of conversation for others and at worst, a mortifying and possibly delusional thing to say.

The types of people that say things like this, it’s a symptom of a larger problem which is their clueless and cringe personality.

Op here, this!! This is what I think I was getting at but couldn't properly articulate. What would make you say it, even if you think it?? It's weird, vain, and worse totally inaccurate. One even pulled out her ID when she ordered her drink. The waiter did not ask for it, but politely checked it. He could look at the age spots on your hands and know you are old enough to drink, Marcy

? DP..

Presumably, you are all friends and friends talk about themselves, no?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am 48 and look 48 and even if I thought I looked younger and young guys were hitting on me I would have enough self-awareness to realize that’s at best a boring self-involved topic of conversation for others and at worst, a mortifying and possibly delusional thing to say.

The types of people that say things like this, it’s a symptom of a larger problem which is their clueless and cringe personality.

Op here, this!! This is what I think I was getting at but couldn't properly articulate. What would make you say it, even if you think it?? It's weird, vain, and worse totally inaccurate. One even pulled out her ID when she ordered her drink. The waiter did not ask for it, but politely checked it. He could look at the age spots on your hands and know you are old enough to drink, Marcy

? DP..

Presumably, you are all friends and friends talk about themselves, no?

I am not OP but no my middle age friends and I never once have sat around and talked about how young we look and how young guys hit on us. I wouldn’t even know how to respond. I’d probably give a blank smile and a wow. It’s not a real conversation starter. Great going Joan! So did you go out with the young guy? Rob didn’t mind?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am 48 and look 48 and even if I thought I looked younger and young guys were hitting on me I would have enough self-awareness to realize that’s at best a boring self-involved topic of conversation for others and at worst, a mortifying and possibly delusional thing to say.

The types of people that say things like this, it’s a symptom of a larger problem which is their clueless and cringe personality.

Op here, this!! This is what I think I was getting at but couldn't properly articulate. What would make you say it, even if you think it?? It's weird, vain, and worse totally inaccurate. One even pulled out her ID when she ordered her drink. The waiter did not ask for it, but politely checked it. He could look at the age spots on your hands and know you are old enough to drink, Marcy

? DP..

Presumably, you are all friends and friends talk about themselves, no?

I am not OP but no my middle age friends and I never once have sat around and talked about how young we look and how young guys hit on us. I wouldn’t even know how to respond. I’d probably give a blank smile and a wow. It’s not a real conversation starter. Great going Joan! So did you go out with the young guy? Rob didn’t mind?

Same. I might mention getting carded or something but I'd never do it in a braggy manner. My friends and I talk about ourselves, of course, but we talk about completely different things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you can dress however you want at any age. I hate people making comments like "after 40 you can't wear mini skirts" or some garbage like that.

So while these women are factually wrong, perhaps it comes from a need to rebel against the perception that they should all wear mumus at their age, and behave like gentle grandmothers.

Good point!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How many of these young, hot men are tagging along to your get togethers? If the answer is NONE, there's your answer.

No, the question is where they invited? Some women really enjoy "girls nights" - I personally would not want to go to a woman only dinner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think I look in my 20’s but I’ve been mistaken to be a younger person many times.

I’m 54 and people assume I’m in my 30’s.

I don’t see it personally.

How does this ever come up in your life? I’m curious. How do you have a 20 year old when you are 35? That type of thing?

In my social circles no one is guessing or commenting on anyone’s age.

From my experience, people tell others what they thing they want to hear. For example, I have a coworker who is older and not particularly pretty at all, but in her mind she is a sexy hot blond. Somehow people are always giving the compliments she craves. Other more beautiful but more grounded women rarely get any compliment because people just don't think they are after that kind of fake flattery. I'm 41 and can look pretty youthful on a good photo (minus the crow's feet), but look like an old hag when I catch my reflection by mistake. It does make me sad to think that's what people see of me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I recently had dinner with relatives, all females in their early 50s. All the women look their ages (and one looks slightly older). During the dinner, all of the women (with straight faces) kept commenting on how young they looked, how people mistake them for 20/30 somethings, how young guys hit on them constantly, etc. I was baffled by the delusion but tried hard not to show it.

Serious question, but what's behind that level of deluding? Is it fear of reality, getting older, being competitive, and is there any point in disagreeing with them when they aren't hurting anyone? Also, what is so wrong with looking good for your age?

I am the youngest in the group at 41, and while I take excellent care of myself, I look my age.

Good for them. Why is this bothering you?

[Anonymous]

Some women get a lot of attention even as they get older b/c they are happy, fun, interested in others, do a lot of fun/different things, and have confidence. They are great to be around b/c they are warm and welcoming. Everyone wants to be close to a woman like that!

[Anonymous]

I’m 54, my hair is past my bra strap, I wear whatever I like, and that includes mini skirts, stilettos, and bikini tops all together. My husband, who happens to be 37, cannot get enough of me and my mental illness. He dumped a woman 18 years my Junior to make me the happiest of women. So if that’s my mental illness then bring it on!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some women get a lot of attention even as they get older b/c they are happy, fun, interested in others, do a lot of fun/different things, and have confidence. They are great to be around b/c they are warm and welcoming. Everyone wants to be close to a woman like that!

I agree with this and also what does this have to do with anything the OP said?

[Anonymous]

No idea. Women on here say it all the time too. I think most of us look our ages and that’s NOT A BAD THING. My goal isn’t to look younger, it’s just to look as best as I can at my age but to look like my age! I’m 37 and not one person is looking at me thinking I’m 20, it’s not possible and I wouldn’t want that either. I just want to look great for 37 (or whatever age I am).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some women get a lot of attention even as they get older b/c they are happy, fun, interested in others, do a lot of fun/different things, and have confidence. They are great to be around b/c they are warm and welcoming. Everyone wants to be close to a woman like that!

I agree with this and also what does this have to do with anything the OP said?

I’m guessing they’re trying to make the connection that those women assume getting attention is because they must look younger but it isn’t, it’s just that they’re fun and magnetic and maybe have a personality that feels young at heart.