How do your kids address their friends' parents?

[Anonymous]

FirstName Uncle, FirstName Auntie - if they are Indians like us.

Uncle FirstName, Auntie FirstName - to our Chinese American friends.

Mrs/Ms LastName, Mr LastName - Rest everyone.

Mrs FirstName, Mr FirstName - When they were younger.
Also
Friend FirstName's Mom, Friend FirstName's Dad - when younger

[Anonymous]

We're all first name here. If a parent said that line about respect to me I would respond "the most respectful thing is to call someone what they want to be called. And I'd like to be called Sara."

[Anonymous]

My kids are teenagers. They call adults Mr/Mrs/Ms LastName.

[Anonymous]

I do think the other parent was rude, and in my case, I don't know how they would have any idea what my last name is. But, I wouldn't put the child in an awkward position by pushing it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread makes me feel really old because I have never heard kids call anyone’s parents simply by their first name. When our kids were small most kids used Mr/Mrs Firstname. But once they hit about 3rd grade, everyone called parents Mr/Mrs Lastname.

How old are you and where do you live?

I'm 48 and live in the DMV. DH and I grew up in completely different cultures but no adult was called by only their first name ever in either culture. It was completely shocking to me the first time I heard an elementary schooler call our 60 year old neighbor by her first name. But we have definitely changed. We have teenagers and our rule is to start with the most formal form of address: Mr/Ms/Dr/Coach Last Name. However, if the person asks you to call them something else, call them something else. IF they don't address it, continue as is.

For the people they have known since they were very little it's more likely to be Mr/Ms First Name.

It was real mental shift for me to let my kids call adults by their first names if requested, and sometimes it still feels wrong. But ultimately we decided that our value is that our children address people as they wish to be addressed, not as we wish them to be addressed.

OP - I agree with others. Don't override the parents. I'm not sure I get why you see an issue you need to correct.

Not the pp, but I grew up in rural New England in the 70s. First names were most common even for elderly people.

[Anonymous]

My kid is 10. All her friends call me “ Larla’s mom” … I do t want them using my first name and Mrs Last Name makes me feel old…..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread makes me feel really old because I have never heard kids call anyone’s parents simply by their first name. When our kids were small most kids used Mr/Mrs Firstname. But once they hit about 3rd grade, everyone called parents Mr/Mrs Lastname.

How old are you and where do you live?

I'm 48 and live in the DMV. DH and I grew up in completely different cultures but no adult was called by only their first name ever in either culture. It was completely shocking to me the first time I heard an elementary schooler call our 60 year old neighbor by her first name. But we have definitely changed. We have teenagers and our rule is to start with the most formal form of address: Mr/Ms/Dr/Coach Last Name. However, if the person asks you to call them something else, call them something else. IF they don't address it, continue as is.

For the people they have known since they were very little it's more likely to be Mr/Ms First Name.

It was real mental shift for me to let my kids call adults by their first names if requested, and sometimes it still feels wrong. But ultimately we decided that our value is that our children address people as they wish to be addressed, not as we wish them to be addressed.

OP - I agree with others. Don't override the parents. I'm not sure I get why you see an issue you need to correct.

Not the pp, but I grew up in rural New England in the 70s. First names were most common even for elderly people.

I’m the one who posted that it made me feel old. I am early 50’s so clearly I am old. But I grew up in NOVA and never used only first names. My DH is a few years older and he grew up in New England. They called everyone Mr/Mrs Lastname too. My MIL would have had a fit if they ever called an adult by their first name only.

[Anonymous]

Ms firstname mr firstname. I like the idea of last names but I think it can get a little confusing when kids have different last names than parents and there are multiple last names in the house. Parents mostly introduce themselves by their first name so at that point you just be guessing.

[Anonymous]

I prefer to just be called by my first name and most of our friends are the same way so my kids call them by their first names. But there are parents who prefer for their kids to say Ms. FirstName or Mrs. LastName and that's fine too. Growing up, we never, ever used last names to refer to adults--it was always Ms. or Mr. FirstName. I still refer to my parents' friends this way. I prefer that to Mrs. LastName but again, if that's what the parents want, that's fine.

I still haven't quite figured out the best way to have my kids address adults whose kids don't use first names so it's usually Kid's Mom or Dad. I just hate the formality of Ms/Mr/Mrs but I get that not everyone feels that way.

And I really don't like Aunt and Uncle for people who are not my actual siblings. My kids don't call any of my friends aunt/uncle even if their kids use that title for me. They use it for my cousins sometimes but that was not a precedent set by me (as I was not the first in the family to have kids). I strongly feel that aunt/uncle should be reserved for their actual aunts and uncles but again, to each their own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What would noted child raising expert Dr. Benjamin Spock say about this?
True story: as a child, in the early 1940s, I lived next door to Dr. Spock and his family. Their children called them both by their first names. "Bengie" for him as I recall.

Are you new here? If not, how come you have held on to this for so long. You should start every response in a parenting thread with, “Having grown up next door to Dr. Spock, I think . . .”

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately, most of them call me Larla’s mom, which I will correct them on. I correct to Ms Firstname for neighbors. School friends is offer Ms Firstname or Mrs Lastname as an option. I’ve been trying to coach my kids to do the same, but I’m sure they just address everyone as Larlo’s mom. If you repeatedly tell my kids to drop the honorific, I am not going to be happy. You do not need to be getting all buddy buddy with my second grader.

[Anonymous]

First name.

[Anonymous]

DCs friends call me Larlo's Mom. I look at is a formal title. Like Queen Regent

[Anonymous]

Miss/Mrs/Mr + first name

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:100% call me by my first name or “Larla’s mom”, and my kids call all of their friend’s parents the same. Respect isn’t only about terms of address.

We encourage "Ms./Mr. FirstName" for our peer-aged friends, and "Mr./Mrs. LastName" for people like older neighbors, ES teachers, etc. Probably 100% of my kid's friends (1st grade) still just call me "Larlo's Mom."