How do your kids address their friends' parents?

[Anonymous]

Wondering how your kids typically address their friends' parents (and how your kids' friends address you)?

My kids are 8 and 10. Their friends address me and my husband by our first names. And within our immediate kid-friend group this is the norm.

However, when my kids are meeting "new parents" initially, I will push Mr. & Mrs/Ms. unless they've previously initiated first name introductions (and my kids are still at an age when they're not really engaging with other parents that I haven't previously met).

i had a slight strange (to me) situation crop up recently where a friend of my son kept calling me Mrs. X (even after I said call me 'Y"). I emphasized this in front of the kid's mother and she said, that in their family "respect is important" (yes, she actually said that) and their children *always* address other parents by Mr./Mrs. But now it's kind of weird...because this kid was over last week with a couple of other friends of my son and the kid kept calling me Mrs. X while the other kids were calling me Y.

I guess I just leave it? It's awkward for me for the kid to be calling me Mrs. X (especially in the presence of other kids who just call me Y) but I don't want to cause problems with the other parent.

What's other people's experience on all of this. I'm used to first name usage - but maybe that's just our own social group????

[Anonymous]

This is a common thing, at least in our social circles. Would just let it be.

[Anonymous]

Have him call you mrs. y. That way he is still using mrs. and showing respect but using your first name. That’s what 99% of our kids call us. Mr. or mrs. First name.

[Anonymous]

It's the culture of his family of origin. That's one of the ways his family defines respect. I'm sure there are many ways you expect your child to act regardless of how other children behave.

Kids learn early on that rules vary by family. It's no big deal, even if a little awkward from your perspective. It's ok to feel a little awkward sometimes. In time, it'll probably feel more normal.

[Anonymous]

I think Miss First Name is a southern thing. I was always called Mrs Last Name by my children’s friends. Using a first name from a kid is presumptive— they are not my friend.
I would not be comfortable with a child calling me by my first name, but you do you.

[Anonymous]

100% call me by my first name or “Larla’s mom”, and my kids call all of their friend’s parents the same. Respect isn’t only about terms of address.

[Anonymous]

I was raised with the Mr and Ms last name convention and it feels weird to me for little kids to just use straight first names. We’ve embraced the southern Mr and Ms first name convention. My kids were really used to it because that’s what their daycare used for staff. Their aftercare program does as well.

That said, for the most part, as they get to the tween years they seem to just avoid using my name as much as possible. And I definitely get “Larla’s mom” from friends who don’t know me.

[Anonymous]

OP don’t worry about the other kid, that’s not your problem. Being called “Mrs X” after you’ve asked to be called “Larla” is a little annoying but hardly worth saying anything.

For your own kid, make your own decisions. For me it’s default to “Mr/Ms Last Name” but adjust as directed.

[Anonymous]

He can’t remember your name but remembers his friends last name so…

It happens to divorced moms who change their last name all the time .

[Anonymous]

My own children call me by my first name. Most of their 8yr old friends call me “Ms. First Name” or “kid’s name’s mom”.
A tiny few call me “Mrs. Last Initial”.

[Anonymous]

We usually ask people what they would like to be called but the default is Ms. first name because that’s how the daycare does it. But if someone like Mrs. x we definitely make sure our kids do it. I don’t care what anyone calls me but don’t like people to be offended.

I have a policy not to contradict a kids parents unless it’s absolutely necessary (like some one would get hurt) so I would definitely not argue about this. Different families different rules

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My own children call me by my first name. Most of their 8yr old friends call me “Ms. First Name” or “kid’s name’s mom”.
A tiny few call me “Mrs. Last Initial”.

Your children call by your first name? Not something like mom?

[Anonymous]

By Miss “first name”. But if a kids parents insist that you be called Mrs. Last name, don’t try to override the parent’s requirements. It makes things awkward for the kid.

[Anonymous]

I don’t allow my kids to call adults by their first name. Please don’t try to override the parents on this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t allow my kids to call adults by their first name. Please don’t try to override the parents on this.

+1000