Do you think parent should tell spouse if leaving the house?

[Anonymous]

If there are children involved yes, otherwise no.

[Anonymous]

Do you guys want to be updated even if you are working and your kids are at school? I don’t. To me the work and school day is different from the evening/weekend. During those times I want an update.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH and I had this discussion. He didn't seem to think it was a big deal. I have since made him see why it is.

If there aren't kids to contend with and both people are fine with it, then it isn't a big deal or a lack of courtesy. My husband and I are both perfectly fine not knowing exactly where each other is at all times. If I want to go get the mail or water the flowers or go chat with neighbor Betty or run and get milk - I do and he does the same. It isn't a disrespectful thing for us to do because we are both fine with the other person leaving the house without telling where they are going and how long they will be until they reenter the house. I would personally for me feel a bit suffocated to have to find and tell him each time I go in or out the door so he knows where I am at all times.

Kids around are a different story.

[Anonymous]

Yes, because if you both happen to get a whim to take a walk or take care of a chore and “be a grown man/woman” , then you could wind up with kids alone in the house. Show him the thread that came up here a month or so ago when the idiot husband left his freaking toddler twins home alone because he “didn’t know” his wife was doing school drop off for other kid (same as every other damn day). Parents of minor children are OBLIGATED to communicate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I had this discussion. He didn't seem to think it was a big deal. I have since made him see why it is.

If there aren't kids to contend with and both people are fine with it, then it isn't a big deal or a lack of courtesy. My husband and I are both perfectly fine not knowing exactly where each other is at all times. If I want to go get the mail or water the flowers or go chat with neighbor Betty or run and get milk - I do and he does the same. It isn't a disrespectful thing for us to do because we are both fine with the other person leaving the house without telling where they are going and how long they will be until they reenter the house. I would personally for me feel a bit suffocated to have to find and tell him each time I go in or out the door so he knows where I am at all times.

Kids around are a different story.

Why are you even weighing in on this thread. It says PARENTS right in the thread title.

[Anonymous]

If your kids require supervision, yes.

If I were busy in another part of the house with the kids and I was “on duty” with them, a text would be fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dh went to get a car inspection and didn’t tell me. I was looking for him and he said he was getting the car inspected. His response was that he is a grown man and that he doesn’t have to tell me when he is leaving the house. He said he isn’t a kid. I was taken aback by his response.

Do you tell your spouse when you are leaving?

Depends. If he is going to be gone a day then, yes, he should tell you. Getting car inspected, no. Maybe he doesn't tell you because you then have all sorts of things for him to do while he's out. Grown up people do not like being treated like children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I had this discussion. He didn't seem to think it was a big deal. I have since made him see why it is.

If there aren't kids to contend with and both people are fine with it, then it isn't a big deal or a lack of courtesy. My husband and I are both perfectly fine not knowing exactly where each other is at all times. If I want to go get the mail or water the flowers or go chat with neighbor Betty or run and get milk - I do and he does the same. It isn't a disrespectful thing for us to do because we are both fine with the other person leaving the house without telling where they are going and how long they will be until they reenter the house. I would personally for me feel a bit suffocated to have to find and tell him each time I go in or out the door so he knows where I am at all times.

Kids around are a different story.

Why are you even weighing in on this thread. It says PARENTS right in the thread title.

What makes you think PP isn't a parent?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. This is common courtesy. Your DH sounds like a petulant teenager.

If OP was saying that she left house without telling her DH and he was upset you would take up for her and say he was petulant for wanting to know where she was every second.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. This is common courtesy. Your DH sounds like a petulant teenager.

If OP was saying that she left house without telling her DH and he was upset you would take up for her and say he was petulant for wanting to know where she was every second.

Whoever is the one getting upset (in OP’s case it’s her husband) is the one who is being petulant (unless there was the issue of not giving the other parent a heads up when there were little kids who needed to be watched, it’s reasonable to be upset about that).

[Anonymous]

YTA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is common courtesy to tell your spouse when you are leaving the house. It’s important to tell your spouse when they are being left in charge of children.

Agree. DH and I both work from home and will even tell each other if we’re running out when the kids are at school. It’s just polite so the other person doesn’t go looking for you when you’re not home. And sometimes if DH is running out I may ask him to do a quick errand for me if it’s on his way. Plus we only one have 1 car so if it’s not a foot outing then we have to coordinate needing the car. I think it’s odd OP’s husband is trying to assert his independence this way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dh went to get a car inspection and didn’t tell me. I was looking for him and he said he was getting the car inspected. His response was that he is a grown man and that he doesn’t have to tell me when he is leaving the house. He said he isn’t a kid. I was taken aback by his response.

Do you tell your spouse when you are leaving?

He sounds like a self-centered child.

[Anonymous]

Lol

“May I please go get the car inspected?”

“Who else will be there? When will you be back? Make sure you tell me if you are going to use any busy roads.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol

“May I please go get the car inspected?”

“Who else will be there? When will you be back? Make sure you tell me if you are going to use any busy roads.”

This is why he doesn't ask her permission!