Boyfriend teases me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Give us examples. This is not to say that you should be in a relationships where you feel your self-esteem is undermined, but you also need to learn to have unshakable confidence in your own views of yourself. I think his teasing bothers you because he touches on things you are insecure about.

No. OP doesn't need to justify how she feels.

What is wrong with some of you people?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I appreciate everyone’s feedback. To give more details…..the teasing is almost every time I see him. Most recently last night, he called and I said hi when answering. He said who just answered the phone. I said, me of course what are you talking about. Then he said wow, your voice sounded so deep. It’s just these constant little comments that I don’t like. There is always a complaint. Another example
Is we went out to eat and he said, let me hurry up and dive into my food before you try to eat some. I’ve never in my life tried to eat his food. Outside of this, I really like him. He shows interest through lots of quality time (my first love language). We have several hobbies in common so outside of the teasing it’s easy to spend time together. Also the sex is great.

OP, I am one of the posters who asked for examples. To me this is not teasing, it's like he has no filter at all and no self-awareness. Does he do this with his friends? Even if he is willing to change, it will take time and effort for him to change his social skills. Does he want to do it? Do you want to put up with it?

[Anonymous]

Op, you do not have to choose this boyfriend.

You are entitled to a preference, and in this case, that means choosing someone else.

[Anonymous]

OP, he sounds like a tool. Whether it’s funny or not, you don’t like it and that’s what’s important. If he can’t seem to control himself and respect your wishes, end it.

[Anonymous]

He’s not for you. This is one of those weird things - in the short term, it’s “what’s the big deal?”, but things like this will just completely wear you down in the long term.

[Anonymous]

OP you're not compatible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I appreciate everyone’s feedback. To give more details…..the teasing is almost every time I see him. Most recently last night, he called and I said hi when answering. He said who just answered the phone. I said, me of course what are you talking about. Then he said wow, your voice sounded so deep. It’s just these constant little comments that I don’t like. There is always a complaint. Another example
Is we went out to eat and he said, let me hurry up and dive into my food before you try to eat some. I’ve never in my life tried to eat his food. Outside of this, I really like him. He shows interest through lots of quality time (my first love language). We have several hobbies in common so outside of the teasing it’s easy to spend time together. Also the sex is great.

OP, I am one of the posters who asked for examples. To me this is not teasing, it's like he has no filter at all and no self-awareness. Does he do this with his friends? Even if he is willing to change, it will take time and effort for him to change his social skills. Does he want to do it? Do you want to put up with it?

I dated someone who said stuff like OP’s BF. It was so annoying and kind of boring because it wasn’t a conversation, it was just one sided weird jokes that I didn’t have a response to. I didn’t feel like I was being teased, I just felt like his jokes were really lame. Good qualities were that he was very intelligent, kind, caring, and handsome, but his “jokes” were just lame and annoying. I really think it was a lack of social skills and i decided we just weren’t compatible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I appreciate everyone’s feedback. To give more details…..the teasing is almost every time I see him. Most recently last night, he called and I said hi when answering. He said who just answered the phone. I said, me of course what are you talking about. Then he said wow, your voice sounded so deep. It’s just these constant little comments that I don’t like. There is always a complaint. Another example
Is we went out to eat and he said, let me hurry up and dive into my food before you try to eat some. I’ve never in my life tried to eat his food. Outside of this, I really like him. He shows interest through lots of quality time (my first love language). We have several hobbies in common so outside of the teasing it’s easy to spend time together. Also the sex is great.

OP, I am one of the posters who asked for examples. To me this is not teasing, it's like he has no filter at all and no self-awareness. Does he do this with his friends? Even if he is willing to change, it will take time and effort for him to change his social skills. Does he want to do it? Do you want to put up with it?

+1. This doesn’t sound like teasing, it’s just … weird.

[Anonymous]

His teasing does sound annoying but more weird and socially awkward than mean. Since you have so much in common and like him a lot, I’d consider trying a bit longer to get him to tone down the lame jokes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dump him. He is just trying to make you feel inferior. Sounds like he is insecure and is putting you down to make himself feel better. Terrible husband material. Move on.

This exactly. But she’ll stay. Crazy, crazy, crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I appreciate everyone’s feedback. To give more details…..the teasing is almost every time I see him. Most recently last night, he called and I said hi when answering. He said who just answered the phone. I said, me of course what are you talking about. Then he said wow, your voice sounded so deep. It’s just these constant little comments that I don’t like. There is always a complaint. Another example
Is we went out to eat and he said, let me hurry up and dive into my food before you try to eat some. I’ve never in my life tried to eat his food. Outside of this, I really like him. He shows interest through lots of quality time (my first love language). We have several hobbies in common so outside of the teasing it’s easy to spend time together. Also the sex is great.

OP, I am one of the posters who asked for examples. To me this is not teasing, it's like he has no filter at all and no self-awareness. Does he do this with his friends? Even if he is willing to change, it will take time and effort for him to change his social skills. Does he want to do it? Do you want to put up with it?

+1. This doesn’t sound like teasing, it’s just … weird.

Reminds me of a guy I knew who had mils Aspergers. Just no awareness of what was coming out of their mouth. This doesn't sound terrible, but also not like something you should have to put up with.

[Anonymous]

You need to find a way to be direct every time he says something that bugs you. They build up and if you are so bothered by it that you come onto DCUM... This is important to you that he stop. So he should stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My boyfriend makes fun of me daily. In general he is very sarcastic and funny, but I don’t like being teased all the time. It bothers me particularly because he is not good at giving words of affirmation. Through his actions I know that he cares for me and I enjoy his company, but the teasing sucks. I’ve voiced this and he said he understands. However the teasing seems to just be ingrained in him. Anyone just sick this type of thing up successfully?

My family does this to me and has always done it. But now I am tired of it, and it is too late for them to stop. I think you should break up as he hasn't changed after you asked him to stop.

[Anonymous]

That doesn't sound like teasing, but it doesn't matter if you are not into it. You can break up with someone for any reason at all, you know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You've asked him to and he won't. This relationship should be terminated.

To those asking "what kind of teasing?" ... just stop. It doesn't matter. He's doing something she's asked him to stop doing.

If OP's BF took a cup of water and dumped it on her every day, and she asked him to stop, but he didn't, would we be asking "Was it boiling hot water, or was it ice water?" TBH, DCUM probably would. For those of you who think it matters what kind of teasing she's getting, it doesn't. She's asked him to stop. So it's like she's getting a cup of ice water dumped on her every day. No, it doesn't leave physical scars. But she shouldn't be subjected to this. She asked that he stop. But instead he goes back to the sink to get another glass of water to dump on her.

It's easy to be kind. He's not being kind.

Wow. You need to lighten way up, PP. Female here.