Want my new daughter in law’s family to start spending holidays with us

[Anonymous]

This is so much like my life I would think it was my MIL but she lacks a sufficient command of English. Though in her defense, in her culture it’s a reasonable expectation that her eldest son’s family prioritize her side of the tree.

[Anonymous]

Actually, if anything it would make sense for you to fly to Portland. Think about it. You only have ONE child. Your new inlaws have THREE. Creating a new tradition for 5 people is much harder than for 3.

Where do your son and DIL live? Are any of her sisters married?

[Anonymous]

LOL, nice try, OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hahaha. Good luck. Best way to start having relationships with your in laws go down hill rapidly. No you don’t get first dibs because you have only one child.

Strongly disagree. That said, OP's demands sound a bit extreme.

You can strongly disagree all you want, but you’re wrong. Shrug.

[Anonymous]

Are you paying for all their travel to Maryland every year?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My new DIL’s family lives in Portland and we would like her family (her 2 sisters and parents) to spend the holidays at our house in Maryland. We have the space and it just makes sense that they stay here. There’s some pushback from her parents about this and I feel like they need to understand I have an only child and am not okay with splitting up holidays between her family and ours. My son and DIL are fine with this plan but the parents are the ones not being agreeable. Any advice dealing with difficult conversations surrounding this?

I say you start a new lovely tradition and invite everyone to spend the holidays at a sunny resort in Puerto Rico.

You treat everyone of course.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like they do understand you are not okay with it, and they are okay with telling you tough luck and letting you fuss.

[Anonymous]

So they never get Christmas at with their son and his future children, ever again as long as you are alive? Because you only had one child so it's just tough luck for them?

Think about what you are asking. The sisters will marry and have children. Are you going to put all of them up too? Are the sisters supposed to tell their new in-laws "tough luck but my brother married an only child, so we have to go to his MIL?". Forever and ever? Come on.

[Anonymous]

Specifically which holidays are you not okay with splitting, OP? How many times a year are you placing this demand on them?

It's a good thing they are already married before you revealed your selfishness and absurdity.

[Anonymous]

“Are you traveling at all over the holidays, Larlo?”

“Yeah. My girlfriend’s sister’s husband’s mother has decided she can’t be alone at Christmas. So she’s throwing this big fit and insisting that my girlfriend’s whole family travel to DC instead.”

“We’ll, DC is supposed to be kind of a fun town these days.”

“Yeah, but they’re not really in DC. They’re in some place called… Bethesda? I think? It’s kind like going to The City and winding up in Short Hills instead.”

“Oh. You’re pretty screwed then.”

“I hope so. Planning to have a lot of sex, complete with high-volume color commentary, to make things for this crazy lady as awkward and annoying as possible.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL, nice try, OP!

+1. 100% troll. No one is this stupid.

[Anonymous]

Op, sounds like you should have had more kids or you should attend their gathering.

[Anonymous]

Oh wow nightmare, so glad I don’t have anyone like this in my family.

[Anonymous]

I think they have every right to demand that you travel to Portland for all holidays because you only have one child and they have three. It makes more sense for just you to travel than for them, your son/DIL, and DIL’s two sisters to all travel to your home. More efficient and easier on everyone if you travel there (you’re retired, right? More freedom to travel than any of the kids). If they don’t have space to put you up, you should get a hotel. It just makes the most sense.

[Anonymous]

We have the space and it just makes sense that they stay here

This makes no sense