Shocking 6 yo behavior at playground

[Anonymous]

I have 10 grown nephews who are now productive members of society and rally nice guys. I remember not really wanting to have a boy because I found it so hard to judge what was normal boy aggressive language at that age versus future psychopath behavior. I distinctly remember more than one of them telling their younger sibling that they wishes they would die and I was shocked. But they learned to handle their negative emotions and are truly wonderful people. I’m not saying that it’s desirable behavior but it is within the realm of behavior for at least some children at that age, I think particularly boys because the content fed to them by society is typically so violent. If a 13 year old was still saying stuff like this, I’d be much more concerned. At 6, it’s an indicator that the child is struggling with dealing with emotions and that’s something you need to really help them with. Some of those kids turn out to be wonderful people because they really do feel things deeply—they need to learn what to do with those feelings.

[Anonymous]

I have three kids, oldest is a teen, and I’ve spend a LOT of times on playgrounds yes I would say this was unusual behavior. Not the dumbie, shut up talk but the want to die talk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“ I don’t care if she falls I want her to die” is not normal. I would not allow my kids to talk like this about each other. Also, if either of my kids called me dumb or a dumbie it would be the first and last time. This type of disrespect is terrible.

Ok, tough guy, how do you fix it with one swoop?

We would immediately leave the playground if my child ever said something like that. This isn’t OP’s kid, of course, so I would just leave the area of the playground or if it continued, go home myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, you live a sheltered existence. Clutch those pearls a little tighter.

+1. None of this is out of the ordinary for a 6 YO having a bad day. Better brace yourself OP. Your angels will have days like this too.

I have a 10yo and an 8yo and my children have never had a “bad day” like this. They have whined, bickered, failed to listen and mind, etc., but they have never been violent or verbally abusive. No, that is not normal. Even #boymoms shouldn’t excuse that kind of behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, you live a sheltered existence. Clutch those pearls a little tighter.

Eh. Mom of 2 boys (now teens) here. All 3 of that in one outing? No. His aggression and anger at his sister’s existence would have taken us home after episode 2.

Three boys here and this. The behavior stuff is one thing - expressing you want your sister to die and call me a name is big ole nope. I probably wouldn't have taken him hope b/c I tried not no allow 1 child's misbehavior to impact his siblings, but at the least he would have had his ass on a bench watching the other kids play. Nip that shit in the bud.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I have a boy and girl. My son never behaved like that. My daughter did. I was used to my sweet boy and had to adapt my parenting for my feisty girl!


Yes, it’s within the range of normal.

You call it feisty, I call it abusive (and yes 6 up’s can be both verbally and physically abusive). And no it’s not normal; your daughter has a serious problem you should address.

Ha ha! She’s 11 now and her teachers love her because she’s a model of good behavior. She used to be seated next to the problem boys in elementary because she was a calming influence.

You just have no clue, do you?

Sounds like you addressed the issue when she was younger, which is exactly what this playground parent should be doing. That doesn’t mean that your daughter’s behavior, if she said she wanted other kids to die for example, was normal or not abusive. That behavior is serious, full stop. Seems you worked it out, which is great for you and your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, you live a sheltered existence. Clutch those pearls a little tighter.

+1. None of this is out of the ordinary for a 6 YO having a bad day. Better brace yourself OP. Your angels will have days like this too.

I have a 10yo and an 8yo and my children have never had a “bad day” like this. They have whined, bickered, failed to listen and mind, etc., but they have never been violent or verbally abusive. No, that is not normal. Even #boymoms shouldn’t excuse that kind of behavior.

But how do you even know his behavior is excused?! You know nothing about that family. NOTHING! You don’t even know if that was his actual mother!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You obviously have a daughter and never been in a group of boys playing. My very sweet sensitive 5yo boy will beat the sh!t out of DH if we let him. He loves his swords and nerf guns. And Taekwondo has been great for him. Except now he knows the proper way to kick and punch his friends when they start roughhousing.

I think saying he wants her to fall is just attention seeking. DS will say stuff like that just to see us react. Yes, he should be reminded that it’s not nice to say things like that. But it’s not a sign he actually wants that to happen or is some future serial killer.

This is OP, I actually do have a 10 yo son and two nephews and I live in the world where 50% of children are boys and I’ve never seen a kid be so nasty repeatedly towards another child (not just a once off frustrated comment but like snickering and evil). I guess my standards for boys are higher than you all. I was just more concerned about violent, targeted behavior of a younger sibling and the fact this kid would likely be in my kids school and be violent and abusive. People brushing off behavior as boys will be boys is why schools are in the situations they are in now with violence and shootings.

OP, if you’ve never seen behavior like this, why are you asking if it’s normal?

[Anonymous]

What you described at the playground is not normal six-year-old behavior. It is completely out of the norm and anybody pretending they’re OK with it or it’s normal are nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, you live a sheltered existence. Clutch those pearls a little tighter.

+1. None of this is out of the ordinary for a 6 YO having a bad day. Better brace yourself OP. Your angels will have days like this too.

I have a 10yo and an 8yo and my children have never had a “bad day” like this. They have whined, bickered, failed to listen and mind, etc., but they have never been violent or verbally abusive. No, that is not normal. Even #boymoms shouldn’t excuse that kind of behavior.

But how do you even know his behavior is excused?! You know nothing about that family. NOTHING! You don’t even know if that was his actual mother!

Calm down--I was talking to the multiple posters who are dismissing this type of alarming behavior as typical and "having a bad day." Uh, no. A typical kid "having a bad day" isn't talking about not caring if a sibling dies.

[Anonymous]

Children’s nerf guns are made for children. Children use them to shoot soft foam nerf darts at each other. Extremely normal.

You did not know that OP?

[Anonymous]

Saying “I wish she would die,” OTOH, is something that would not fly with my kids. We would have had a talk about that one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Saying “I wish she would die,” OTOH, is something that would not fly with my kids. We would have had a talk about that one.

I am not sure I would have addressed it in public, though. Sometimes I save those serious talks for when I can focus on the kid with no interruptions or audience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Please tell me this is not normal behavior for a 5/6 yo. I took my dd, 5, to the neighborhood playground this afternoon and there was another mom there from our neighborhood with her two kids, girl about 4 and boy about 6. The 6 yo boys language and behavior was so disturbing. At one point his sister was climbing the jungle gym and the mom told her to be careful and the little boy goes ‘I don’t care if she falls, I want her to die!’ Then at another point, the boy tossed his little sisters baby doll stroller onto the ground and the mom took him aside to scold him I presume, and he yells out ‘Shut up you’re a dumbie!’ The last straw was when he pulled out a nerf gun, pointed it as his sister and shot her with the nerf.

All through this, the mother mostly stood oblivious (except for attempted stroller incident scolding). In this day and age, how do you let your kid act that way. I’m just hoping he won’t be in my kids school.

It's normal for a rising sociopath/psycopath. Obviously, this is unacceptable and the mother has failed on evey level as a parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You obviously have a daughter and never been in a group of boys playing. My very sweet sensitive 5yo boy will beat the sh!t out of DH if we let him. He loves his swords and nerf guns. And Taekwondo has been great for him. Except now he knows the proper way to kick and punch his friends when they start roughhousing.

I think saying he wants her to fall is just attention seeking. DS will say stuff like that just to see us react. Yes, he should be reminded that it’s not nice to say things like that. But it’s not a sign he actually wants that to happen or is some future serial killer.

This is OP, I actually do have a 10 yo son and two nephews and I live in the world where 50% of children are boys and I’ve never seen a kid be so nasty repeatedly towards another child (not just a once off frustrated comment but like snickering and evil). I guess my standards for boys are higher than you all. I was just more concerned about violent, targeted behavior of a younger sibling and the fact this kid would likely be in my kids school and be violent and abusive. People brushing off behavior as boys will be boys is why schools are in the situations they are in now with violence and shootings.

Ok OP. Your perfect children and nephews are perfect. They’re perfect because your “standards for boys are higher” than everyone else’s. Since they’re all set and doing great, work on your smug self. You seem to have lots of extra time to worry about things that don’t even affect you.