Our culture is deeply misogynistic

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:op here. I think I realized it before on some level, but I’m seeing how deep it goes more now than I saw it before. But these comments are actually great fodder for my point. Even feminist women are negative. I don’t feel oppressed. I’m happily married, thriving professionally, and more than comfortable. I’m just noting what I’m seeing in our culture. Like happening to aging women including me.

Op can you tell us more what you are observing?

A lot of verbal abuse and anger, by men and women alike. A lot of younger men taking credit for work that older women do. A lot of women in meetings and in life having to repeat themselves or remind people of what they said—because people discount or disregard what older women are saying. It is crazy to see it so so clearly now. Like one of those hidden visual images when we were teens— you stare long enough and the tiger pops out. You’re like wow how did I not see that tiger?! People, the tiger is there and it’s cutting off a major source of value and charm of life (that I think older women bring to society) for all of us.

Sounds like a workplace issue.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, I don’t. I was raised by an old-school Irish Catholic father. Socially I had more restrictions, but academically I was expected two excel and reach full potential. My career was very successful in my field. It still is. I am 52 and work with predominately younger individuals male and female. Middle-aged female managers are very supported, at least as much as anyone else.
Personally, I don’t look for media to be my litmus test. But then again, I don’t like most media. If you think about TV shows and movies 30+ years ago though you have to admit women are seen in a more equal role.

I’m actually more worried about DS than DDs future except for safety.

[Anonymous]

Yes, and I actually find it worse in the U.S. compared to other countries I've spent time in. For example, yes France can be misogynistic but...older women are often celebrated there as sexy, and this would be shocking to so many Americans as well as British people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Woman in her late 40s here. Men have always been a heck of a lot nicer to me than other women. Women tend to gang up on ones who don't conform to a point of view, etc. They also judge each other more harshly than men on many levels and in the workplace especially so.

So much this. And i've really tried to connect with a lot of women, but if you don't follow the 'queen bee' of a group, you're a target.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have two girls 7 and 9 and I tell them “the world does not like women” and I show them examples of this playing out.

It doesn’t like white boys either.

And black boys even less.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Woman in her late 40s here. Men have always been a heck of a lot nicer to me than other women. Women tend to gang up on ones who don't conform to a point of view, etc. They also judge each other more harshly than men on many levels and in the workplace especially so.

So much this. And i've really tried to connect with a lot of women, but if you don't follow the 'queen bee' of a group, you're a target.

Confirming OP's point. Note she said it comes from women too.

[Anonymous]

I agree with OP and PPs that the U.S. society is misogynistic. Probably due to being quite religious since most religions place women below men in everything. Also, prevalence of pseudo science and fake psychology used to justify keeping women in their places secondary to men. I am European and quite shocked at what’s happening here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m just realizing this as a female at age 54. So much hatred and disgust hurled at women. I think I didn’t see it when I was younger because I was attractive enough. I see it everywhere now that the male gaze is not on me so heavily. I don’t feel as watched and can do the watching. By misogynistic, I mean a dislike of women, women themselves included. Is this something every aging woman sees?

Seriously at 54? Are you not familiar with the Middle east, India, or certain parts of Africa?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I don’t. I was raised by an old-school Irish Catholic father. Socially I had more restrictions, but academically I was expected two excel and reach full potential. My career was very successful in my field. It still is. I am 52 and work with predominately younger individuals male and female. Middle-aged female managers are very supported, at least as much as anyone else.
Personally, I don’t look for media to be my litmus test. But then again, I don’t like most media. If you think about TV shows and movies 30+ years ago though you have to admit women are seen in a more equal role.

I’m actually more worried about DS than DDs future except for safety.

I'm 53 and have a similar story. I grew up not knowing any women who had been to college or had careers, came up through an industry where I was frequently the only woman in my particular specialization, and look around now at a professional environment where there's absolutely equal opportunity for women. There's still plenty of stuff, and I still think I probably have to work harder to be respected in some contexts. But I've had great male bosses throughout my career who gave me opportunities and never treated me as anything less than equal.

[Anonymous]

As a young woman, I think us millennial and Gen Z women have been pointing this out for years and mostly got routinely mocked by older women who called us snowflakes and such. So *shrug*- I would feel way more for older women had they done more to protect younger women and change things for us and supported us in this fight. But now I feel like you guys have to be on your own, because for years men have preyed on younger women and mostly your generation was totally silent and if anything enabled things.

Sorry, but that's just how I feel. Not a lot of tolerance for boomer or Gen X women at this point in my life. Actally IME women of an older generation (the one before yours) fought harder and were more protective of young women than your generation ever was.

So... chickens come home to roost. Oh well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I don’t. I was raised by an old-school Irish Catholic father. Socially I had more restrictions, but academically I was expected two excel and reach full potential. My career was very successful in my field. It still is. I am 52 and work with predominately younger individuals male and female. Middle-aged female managers are very supported, at least as much as anyone else.
Personally, I don’t look for media to be my litmus test. But then again, I don’t like most media. If you think about TV shows and movies 30+ years ago though you have to admit women are seen in a more equal role.

I’m actually more worried about DS than DDs future except for safety.

I’m 52 and my dad told me all I needed to learn was how to type. I didn’t need college because it would be “wasted on me” but my 5 brothers went to college. He told me there would be no unemployment if women would stay home.

I disagreed and am very successful. My 1st promotion he toasted to affirmative action.

One of my professors in the engineering school said it was extremely difficult to get into the engineer program, for those that earned it congratulations. Looked at me … and then some we have to let in because of quotas. I was the only woman in the room.

You were lucky to be shielded from it.

As for your DS, it will be harder for him than your h because now he actually has to play on a level playing ti we kid instead of being given everything for little effort.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I don’t. I was raised by an old-school Irish Catholic father. Socially I had more restrictions, but academically I was expected two excel and reach full potential. My career was very successful in my field. It still is. I am 52 and work with predominately younger individuals male and female. Middle-aged female managers are very supported, at least as much as anyone else.
Personally, I don’t look for media to be my litmus test. But then again, I don’t like most media. If you think about TV shows and movies 30+ years ago though you have to admit women are seen in a more equal role.

I’m actually more worried about DS than DDs future except for safety.

I'm 53 and have a similar story. I grew up not knowing any women who had been to college or had careers, came up through an industry where I was frequently the only woman in my particular specialization, and look around now at a professional environment where there's absolutely equal opportunity for women. There's still plenty of stuff, and I still think I probably have to work harder to be respected in some contexts. But I've had great male bosses throughout my career who gave me opportunities and never treated me as anything less than equal.

You never went to school? Or were all of your teachers male?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I don’t. I was raised by an old-school Irish Catholic father. Socially I had more restrictions, but academically I was expected two excel and reach full potential. My career was very successful in my field. It still is. I am 52 and work with predominately younger individuals male and female. Middle-aged female managers are very supported, at least as much as anyone else.
Personally, I don’t look for media to be my litmus test. But then again, I don’t like most media. If you think about TV shows and movies 30+ years ago though you have to admit women are seen in a more equal role.

I’m actually more worried about DS than DDs future except for safety.

I'm 53 and have a similar story. I grew up not knowing any women who had been to college or had careers, came up through an industry where I was frequently the only woman in my particular specialization, and look around now at a professional environment where there's absolutely equal opportunity for women. There's still plenty of stuff, and I still think I probably have to work harder to be respected in some contexts. But I've had great male bosses throughout my career who gave me opportunities and never treated me as anything less than equal.

+1

51-year old STEM professional/grad degree. Also, a D1 athlete in soccer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a young woman, I think us millennial and Gen Z women have been pointing this out for years and mostly got routinely mocked by older women who called us snowflakes and such. So *shrug*- I would feel way more for older women had they done more to protect younger women and change things for us and supported us in this fight. But now I feel like you guys have to be on your own, because for years men have preyed on younger women and mostly your generation was totally silent and if anything enabled things.

Sorry, but that's just how I feel. Not a lot of tolerance for boomer or Gen X women at this point in my life. Actally IME women of an older generation (the one before yours) fought harder and were more protective of young women than your generation ever was.

So... chickens come home to roost. Oh well.

The millennial and Gen Z women are sexualising themselves far more than any other generation in history. I now see younger women as objects far more now than ever before. You are asking the previous generation to fix up a problem that has been around a lot longer than that of one generation and I can assure you, that the millennials and gen Z women will do nothing as well. In fact I see future generations of women with extreme mental health issues and body image issues as they struggle to continue the strict image status that is now upon younger women. The body must be perfect, make up perfected every day, wearing designer clothes, successful in every facet of life. This is hard to pull off and the pressure to maintain this throughout life will surely end up taking its toll. That is what your generation will pass on to younger females, to continue striving to be gorgeous for the male gaze, in essence you are adding to the misogyny.

I was never overly attractive so I saw the difference much younger however the one thing that has shocked me as I have aged is the misogyny from younger women. I always knew men hated older women but I never expected to see that from women. I see that women today have far more opportunities than ever before and a lot of great women take those opportunities but a lot of young women just see their looks as being paramount, at a time when they could do anything it seems all they care about is their looks which in essence is what men have said is the most important thing about women. Younger women can't see this and as they take off their clothes thinking they are empowering themselves they are in reality giving men what they want and doing what men have told them to do. Its not empowering, I just see it as extremely sad especially for future generations.

[Anonymous]

OP exactly what are you expecting? You’ve given no examples and I don’t think your statements are uniformly true at all.