Where are the referees?

[Anonymous]

As a 15-16 year old I HAD to ref..yes it paid well ($75 per game cash back in early oughts) so we would clear $300 per day for basically a morning or afternoon. Straight cash, no 1099. 17-18 it was 1099 but was paid better. Now, no kid is going to give up half their likely only weekend day to sit through the abuse. And, with the new group of parents who have learned to outsource EVERYTHING there are none of the 4-5 parents each year who stepped up. This was happening well before COVID, but combined with the older refs leaving perhaps in part due to COVID it has just become worse.

FWIW my high school required varsity players on every team to officiate youth sports in their town; some coaches still do and the town where I grew up has zero problems getting officials because of this. That isn't done here though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can't speak for all of the former referees just this one. Didn't renew when there weren't any games to work anyways and no way to earn that back. Then with a year off for perspective I realized how much better life is without the hassle. I put in ten years, I paid my dues. Some of you other can step up now.

I love working with the kids and reffing the games but putting up with the constant abuse is just not worth it. I am a much better referee than they are a parent or coach but you don't hear me telling them how to parent or how to coach. It's ridiculous.

I think this is a lot of it - not just with soccer refs but in a lot of aspects of life.

People stopped for a year and are really re-evaluating what is fun/beneficial/meaningful/worthwhile in their lives. It's not surprising that getting yelled at by a bunch of parents to ref a kids' game for very little pay didn't make the list for a lot of people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can't speak for all of the former referees just this one. Didn't renew when there weren't any games to work anyways and no way to earn that back. Then with a year off for perspective I realized how much better life is without the hassle. I put in ten years, I paid my dues. Some of you other can step up now.

I love working with the kids and reffing the games but putting up with the constant abuse is just not worth it. I am a much better referee than they are a parent or coach but you don't hear me telling them how to parent or how to coach. It's ridiculous.

I realize that parent comments/actions crossing the line (in one way or another) have to be dealt with, but re: everything else, isn't it possible to just disregard the comments coming from the sidelines? I think the silent majority of parents at most games understand and appreciate refs. ignoring the standard, dumb stuff coming from the sidelines unless the ref. decides it crosses a line.

Absolutely it is ignored most of the time by the Centers.
But ignoring it inevitably allows it to grow into something uglier.
The Center is there to protect the safety of the players and the integrity of the game.
Are fans really there to criticize from their foldup chair with Starbucks ?

Honestly show me a youth soccer game and I’ll show you at least one parent who crosses the line

+1 Just a few games left of U11 EDP Premier Level season and every game has had at least one parent cross the line. This is U11.

https://sportslens.com/news/former-premier-league-referees-have-urged-the-football-association-to-consider-introducing-video-cameras/

Ref. organization provides to refs free, passes cost (ref fees) to clubs?

[Anonymous]

^ And the ARs get barraged by the coaches on the sidelines, outside of earshot.

My young teen refs and she came home yesterday with a splitting headache after the assist coach yelled directly behind her for most of the game. Just a lot of mental and physical toxicity, esp for kids who aren't used to this.

Ironically, she let a comment about her performance slide (supposedly touching her hair is big no-no), demonstrating more maturity and class than the coach. Sad soccer times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can't speak for all of the former referees just this one. Didn't renew when there weren't any games to work anyways and no way to earn that back. Then with a year off for perspective I realized how much better life is without the hassle. I put in ten years, I paid my dues. Some of you other can step up now.

I love working with the kids and reffing the games but putting up with the constant abuse is just not worth it. I am a much better referee than they are a parent or coach but you don't hear me telling them how to parent or how to coach. It's ridiculous.

I realize that parent comments/actions crossing the line (in one way or another) have to be dealt with, but re: everything else, isn't it possible to just disregard the comments coming from the sidelines? I think the silent majority of parents at most games understand and appreciate refs. ignoring the standard, dumb stuff coming from the sidelines unless the ref. decides it crosses a line.

Absolutely it is ignored most of the time by the Centers.
But ignoring it inevitably allows it to grow into something uglier.
The Center is there to protect the safety of the players and the integrity of the game.
Are fans really there to criticize from their foldup chair with Starbucks ?

Honestly show me a youth soccer game and I’ll show you at least one parent who crosses the line

+1 Just a few games left of U11 EDP Premier Level season and every game has had at least one parent cross the line. This is U11.

https://sportslens.com/news/former-premier-league-referees-have-urged-the-football-association-to-consider-introducing-video-cameras/

Ref. organization provides to refs free, passes cost (ref fees) to clubs?

Or provide upon request based on known toxic league/division/club/team or for any reason really.

[Anonymous]

I do think sometimes how great it would be to video the parents and their behavior from my field vantage point.

The mirror does not reflect a lot of beauty

[Anonymous]

If you’re going to be a ref you need to have thick skin. Else don’t do it. I reffed as a kid. It was easy most of the time. When parents did get unruly there are easy things to do to cut that off. At the same time, if you’ve never played soccer you probably should not ref. You’ll lack understanding and empathy that the game is about the players and not about you or some strict rule interpretation.

[Anonymous]

Our ECNL game was cancelled this past weekend because there was no ref.

[Anonymous]

Teenage refs are influenced from parents yelling.

DD had a game yesterday and every time a parent yelled from the other team a foul was called. There were numerous of the same foul's on MY DD's team, but the parents don't usually yell and let the refs do their job. These fouls were the same as the fouls on the other team, but the only difference is the other team's parents would be more vocal. All 3 refs appeared to be under 18 yrs of age and this is an ECNL game.

Also, one AR had called offsides and the ball went out of bounds, which resulted in a corner kick, but the main ref didn't even look to the AR at all and immediately went to the corner kick. The AR put their flag down and let the play continue which resulted in a goal off the corner kick.

THE AR SHOULD HAVE BEEN COMMUNICATING TO THE REF THAT IT WAS OFFSIDES BEFORE THE CORNER KICK EVEN HAPPENED!!

I don't mind teenager's refereeing games, but if you aren't going to uphold your own call, then you should be a referee.

[Anonymous]

Teenage refs are influenced from parents yelling.

DD had a game yesterday and every time a parent yelled from the other team a foul was called. There were numerous of the same foul's on MY DD's team, but the parents don't usually yell and let the refs do their job. These fouls were the same as the fouls on the other team, but the only difference is the other team's parents would be more vocal. All 3 refs appeared to be under 18 yrs of age and this is an ECNL game.

Also, one AR had called offsides and the ball went out of bounds, which resulted in a corner kick, but the main ref didn't even look to the AR at all and immediately went to the corner kick. The AR put their flag down and let the play continue which resulted in a goal off the corner kick.

THE AR SHOULD HAVE BEEN COMMUNICATING TO THE REF THAT IT WAS OFFSIDES BEFORE THE CORNER KICK EVEN HAPPENED!!

I don't mind teenager's refereeing games, but if you aren't going to uphold your own call, then you shouldn't be a referee.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teenage refs are influenced from parents yelling.

DD had a game yesterday and every time a parent yelled from the other team a foul was called. There were numerous of the same foul's on MY DD's team, but the parents don't usually yell and let the refs do their job. These fouls were the same as the fouls on the other team, but the only difference is the other team's parents would be more vocal. All 3 refs appeared to be under 18 yrs of age and this is an ECNL game.

Also, one AR had called offsides and the ball went out of bounds, which resulted in a corner kick, but the main ref didn't even look to the AR at all and immediately went to the corner kick. The AR put their flag down and let the play continue which resulted in a goal off the corner kick.

THE AR SHOULD HAVE BEEN COMMUNICATING TO THE REF THAT IT WAS OFFSIDES BEFORE THE CORNER KICK EVEN HAPPENED!!

I don't mind teenager's refereeing games, but if you aren't going to uphold your own call, then you should be a referee.

Great example of why parents should just not yell or say anything from the sidelines unless it’s to cheer on their kid. I don’t understand why this is so hard.
Soccer is tough, refereeing isn’t perfect. Just be quiet by the stands and talk to your kids after the game about dealing with losses, bad calls, etc. Find another way to vent your frustrations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teenage refs are influenced from parents yelling.

DD had a game yesterday and every time a parent yelled from the other team a foul was called. There were numerous of the same foul's on MY DD's team, but the parents don't usually yell and let the refs do their job. These fouls were the same as the fouls on the other team, but the only difference is the other team's parents would be more vocal. All 3 refs appeared to be under 18 yrs of age and this is an ECNL game.

Also, one AR had called offsides and the ball went out of bounds, which resulted in a corner kick, but the main ref didn't even look to the AR at all and immediately went to the corner kick. The AR put their flag down and let the play continue which resulted in a goal off the corner kick.

THE AR SHOULD HAVE BEEN COMMUNICATING TO THE REF THAT IT WAS OFFSIDES BEFORE THE CORNER KICK EVEN HAPPENED!!

I don't mind teenager's refereeing games, but if you aren't going to uphold your own call, then you shouldn't be a referee.

If a corner kick goal was made, that’s the team’s fault for letting it in. Not a bad call. That’s soccer, suck it up and let kids learn how to play through bad calls or tough situations and take control of what they can control.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can't speak for all of the former referees just this one. Didn't renew when there weren't any games to work anyways and no way to earn that back. Then with a year off for perspective I realized how much better life is without the hassle. I put in ten years, I paid my dues. Some of you other can step up now.

I love working with the kids and reffing the games but putting up with the constant abuse is just not worth it. I am a much better referee than they are a parent or coach but you don't hear me telling them how to parent or how to coach. It's ridiculous.

I realize that parent comments/actions crossing the line (in one way or another) have to be dealt with, but re: everything else, isn't it possible to just disregard the comments coming from the sidelines? I think the silent majority of parents at most games understand and appreciate refs. ignoring the standard, dumb stuff coming from the sidelines unless the ref. decides it crosses a line.

True but I imagine it wears on the referee eventually. I’m a parent and it’s incredibly unpleasant to sit entire matches hearing other parents berate/coach their kids and the ref. It dampens the mood with all the tension they create. There’s been a couple of games when we ran off as soon as the match was over because we didn’t want to deal with or see what angry parents would do to the ref or what they would say to their kids.

I agree. The average regular parents on my kids' teams are too much for me. You couldn't pay me enough to ref.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teenage refs are influenced from parents yelling.

DD had a game yesterday and every time a parent yelled from the other team a foul was called. There were numerous of the same foul's on MY DD's team, but the parents don't usually yell and let the refs do their job. These fouls were the same as the fouls on the other team, but the only difference is the other team's parents would be more vocal. All 3 refs appeared to be under 18 yrs of age and this is an ECNL game.

Also, one AR had called offsides and the ball went out of bounds, which resulted in a corner kick, but the main ref didn't even look to the AR at all and immediately went to the corner kick. The AR put their flag down and let the play continue which resulted in a goal off the corner kick.

THE AR SHOULD HAVE BEEN COMMUNICATING TO THE REF THAT IT WAS OFFSIDES BEFORE THE CORNER KICK EVEN HAPPENED!!

I don't mind teenager's refereeing games, but if you aren't going to uphold your own call, then you shouldn't be a referee.

Again the criticism illustrates the problem: as a referee I hear this as the parent believes the AR got a call right and the Center missed it and the result was a goal off a corner. Assuming the parent is correct (which is a big assumption) so what? Mistakes are made, that is frustrating but part of the game. Even when the mistakes are caught as this weekend when i saw my AR stand with flag up after a goal indicating offsides instead of running to center, we conferred and ruled it offsides and no goal, guess what? Yep a barrage of abuse started at us because we attempted to do our best on a split second judgment call.

And now parents are posting in all caps that they don’t want the referees who reffed their game back. On a thread about ref shortage.

Oh well

[Anonymous]

You think because you overpay by thousands to have your kid play in some overrated branded league you should be provided premier league referees instead of a bunch of kids learning??? Last time I worked ECNL paid about the same as NCSL, they don't use the extra fee money to hire better refs they keep it. Yes, young referees often have a lot to learn. That's why they are working your kid's games instead of an important game. Because your kid's games are insignificant and don't matter. If your kid's game mattered you wouldn't have a teenager reffing it. You seriously need to get over yourself.

Anonymous wrote:Teenage refs are influenced from parents yelling.

DD had a game yesterday and every time a parent yelled from the other team a foul was called. There were numerous of the same foul's on MY DD's team, but the parents don't usually yell and let the refs do their job. These fouls were the same as the fouls on the other team, but the only difference is the other team's parents would be more vocal. All 3 refs appeared to be under 18 yrs of age and this is an ECNL game.

Also, one AR had called offsides and the ball went out of bounds, which resulted in a corner kick, but the main ref didn't even look to the AR at all and immediately went to the corner kick. The AR put their flag down and let the play continue which resulted in a goal off the corner kick.

THE AR SHOULD HAVE BEEN COMMUNICATING TO THE REF THAT IT WAS OFFSIDES BEFORE THE CORNER KICK EVEN HAPPENED!!

I don't mind teenager's refereeing games, but if you aren't going to uphold your own call, then you shouldn't be a referee.