Can DH request a circumcision while I'm recovering from childbirth?

[Anonymous]

Or any time without my consent?

We're discussing the subject and hopefully our child will be a girl. He's a nice guy but when it comes to his boy parts he gets emotional, and just for looks I'm not willing to get my son mutilated.

Thanks for your advice.

[Anonymous]

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[Anonymous]

I honestly don't know, but "we" as a couple were asked when we were in labor. The procedure wouldn't be done when you were in active labor...you'll know when they take the baby away from you. If you don't want it done, make it clear to the dr. That being said, if you are nervous that your husband would go beyond your back, then I really think you need to discuss this, perhaps with a doctor.

[Anonymous]

My guess is yes, that only one parent's signature would be enough for informed consent. I take my kids all the time for medical procedures without my husband.

In our case, we were shocked to have a dr casually walk in and announce that he was there to do the circ. Luckily, my husband and I were in agreement not to do it (and if we were to have done it, it would have been 8 days later as we are Jewish). We wondered what would have happened if I had been out of it and DH hadn't been there.

[Anonymous]

I work in a hospital. State your preference for no circumcision at your next prenatal appointment. State that you want it noted in your chart. Next, when you check into the hospital, tell your labor nurses about no circumcision. It will be noted again in your chart. Tell them to chart it for sure. They will.

There is no hospital or doctor who is going to perform elective surgery on a minor if one of the parents has already said NO and it is in the chart. They simply are not going to leave themselves open like that, liability-wise. So if you have said NO and it is charted, that is the final word.

In the case of the pp who had the MD arrive to do the circumcision, neither parent had previously stated their wishes. The MD made a big assumption by showing up, However the MD would not have gone ahead without consent. The H may have been able in this circumstance to give the consent alone, but if one parent has already said NO and it is charted, then the H would not be able to override that.

Say no early, and often , and ask them to put it in the chart.

(And try to get on the same page with your H about this! )

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Or any time without my consent?

We're discussing the subject and hopefully our child will be a girl. He's a nice guy but when it comes to his boy parts he gets emotional, and just for looks I'm not willing to get my son mutilated.

Thanks for your advice.

Your husband has undergone the procedure, does he feel mutilated?

[Anonymous]

If you feel like your husband would go behind your back in this case, then I think you have bigger issues to deal with. Work this out before you give birth.

[Anonymous]

op's brain was mutilated

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you feel like your husband would go behind your back in this case, then I think you have bigger issues to deal with. Work this out before you give birth.

Ditto.

It takes just one parent's authorization. I know because I was the one to authorize it, but we had discussed and both agreed before hand.

[Anonymous]

PP is correct. If you object in writing, they won't get in the middle of that.

[Anonymous]

Are you kidding me? I agree with PPs. You need Dr. Phil.

[Anonymous]

What do you mean while you're recovering? They don't use ether anymore, dear. You'll be awake the whole time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you feel like your husband would go behind your back in this case, then I think you have bigger issues to deal with. Work this out before you give birth.

Where is the rolling eye emoticon?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you mean while you're recovering? They don't use ether anymore, dear. You'll be awake the whole time.

I thought the same thing. And the circ is done the next day or two. It's not like the baby is an hour old and having this procedure done.

As others have said, figure this out with your husband. I had no opinion when I got pregnant. Then I researched and saw the instruments used and how it was done. That helped me decide no. DH was fine with that. My friend and DH were deadlocked. It was really stressful and a point of contention during the pregnancy. But they did make the decision together. There was no sneaking the baby off while mom took a nap. In the end, the child was circ'd. Other than nursing, she made him do all the care and diaper changing after it was done.

[Anonymous]

They ask while you're in labor. They want an answer even if you're having a girl.

Make it clear when you arrive. It will be in your chart.