Female sexual desire

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is insulting.

I don’t want to have sex with my husband when he’s fat. I have never been attracted to women, yet I get the simulated experience of sleeping with a pregnant woman if I ever want to have sex. His beer belly is the size of a 6 month pregnant woman. It’s unattractive and kills the mood.

This has nothing to do with my insecurities or how I feel about my body. It’s insulting to suggest that not wanting to have sex with an obese guy is somehow “in my head.”

"the mood" is in your head. Get on top, get it from behind, get creative. If you're imagining "beer belly" and "6 month pregnant woman" and that's not doing it for you, well, that's your head. You can condition yourself to be attracted to all kinds of things.

-a woman

This is the dumbest most insane thing on this thread. No way can I close my eyes and think of England. I’m not Melanie. I’ll literally vomit.
-a woman

Squeamish people are bad in bed.

I’m not squeamish if you’re hot. But I’m not effing you if you’re fat. Sorry not sorry.

"My orgasm depends on your body" is a low-skill, sexually-immature mentality, for all parties

Get real.

Sorry you’re unattractive.

Sorry you're small-minded and a terrible lay!

Dude, it's basic biology to want to mate with someone who is healthy. It goes against nature to want to procreate with someone who is obviously ill. That's like someone saying to you that you are bad at sex because you don't want it with your partner who currently has a chicken pox infection. It's normal (and healthy) to be turned off by an unhealthy body.

compares "obesity" (which, to someone like you, is probably a size 12) to an infectious disease...

Yup. fatphobic incel troll is back!

I’m a woman. And obesity is a disorder. It’s not a healthy or normal way of being. It’s not a moral failing. But I don’t want to have sex with my DH after he gained 30lbs. That’s a normal reaction.

30 lbs overweight isn't a disorder. And no, sexually rejecting someone you claim to love because they've gained weight isn't "a normal reaction" at all.

You're vain. Just admit it.

The f^^k it isn't. You don't even differentiate between a 12 yo girl at 140 and a 55 yo man at 230. They aren't the same and you are so disingenuos that you will atempt to normalize it.

This country is in crisis. People are fat af. The Army declined the largest percentage of recruits in .... the history of.... Army recruiting. Diabetes is rampant in the youngest generation.

Stop making it Ok to be fat. You may as well be defending drunks. Just stop.

Take your meds, Steve. You sound utterly unhinged.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is insulting.

I don’t want to have sex with my husband when he’s fat. I have never been attracted to women, yet I get the simulated experience of sleeping with a pregnant woman if I ever want to have sex. His beer belly is the size of a 6 month pregnant woman. It’s unattractive and kills the mood.

This has nothing to do with my insecurities or how I feel about my body. It’s insulting to suggest that not wanting to have sex with an obese guy is somehow “in my head.”

"the mood" is in your head. Get on top, get it from behind, get creative. If you're imagining "beer belly" and "6 month pregnant woman" and that's not doing it for you, well, that's your head. You can condition yourself to be attracted to all kinds of things.

-a woman

This is the dumbest most insane thing on this thread. No way can I close my eyes and think of England. I’m not Melanie. I’ll literally vomit.
-a woman

Squeamish people are bad in bed.

I’m not squeamish if you’re hot. But I’m not effing you if you’re fat. Sorry not sorry.

"My orgasm depends on your body" is a low-skill, sexually-immature mentality, for all parties

Get real.

Sorry you’re unattractive.

Sorry you're small-minded and a terrible lay!

Dude, it's basic biology to want to mate with someone who is healthy. It goes against nature to want to procreate with someone who is obviously ill. That's like someone saying to you that you are bad at sex because you don't want it with your partner who currently has a chicken pox infection. It's normal (and healthy) to be turned off by an unhealthy body.

compares "obesity" (which, to someone like you, is probably a size 12) to an infectious disease...

Yup. fatphobic incel troll is back!

I’m a woman. And obesity is a disorder. It’s not a healthy or normal way of being. It’s not a moral failing. But I don’t want to have sex with my DH after he gained 30lbs. That’s a normal reaction.

30 lbs overweight isn't a disorder. And no, sexually rejecting someone you claim to love because they've gained weight isn't "a normal reaction" at all.

You're vain. Just admit it.

DP. My husband didn’t want to have sex with me when I gained 30 lbs during a mental health situation. I don’t blame him. I am only 5’2 and the extra weight made me look and feel awful. I’ve lost the weight and everything went back on track.

How long did you stop having sex for? Other than when I our children, I don’t think we have gone more than a week without having sex. It would take six months to lose 30lbs at 1-2 lbs/wk. Not to mention the time he wasn’t having sex with you before you lost the weight.
That seems kind of wild.

DP I mean, everybody gets choices, right? Have sex with someone at less-than-peak, or have no sex with someone who may feel hurt or rejected even though you claim to love them...

Y'all are kinda sick.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is insulting.

I don’t want to have sex with my husband when he’s fat. I have never been attracted to women, yet I get the simulated experience of sleeping with a pregnant woman if I ever want to have sex. His beer belly is the size of a 6 month pregnant woman. It’s unattractive and kills the mood.

This has nothing to do with my insecurities or how I feel about my body. It’s insulting to suggest that not wanting to have sex with an obese guy is somehow “in my head.”

"the mood" is in your head. Get on top, get it from behind, get creative. If you're imagining "beer belly" and "6 month pregnant woman" and that's not doing it for you, well, that's your head. You can condition yourself to be attracted to all kinds of things.

-a woman

This is the dumbest most insane thing on this thread. No way can I close my eyes and think of England. I’m not Melanie. I’ll literally vomit.
-a woman

Squeamish people are bad in bed.

I’m not squeamish if you’re hot. But I’m not effing you if you’re fat. Sorry not sorry.

"My orgasm depends on your body" is a low-skill, sexually-immature mentality, for all parties

Get real.

Sorry you’re unattractive.

Sorry you're small-minded and a terrible lay!

Dude, it's basic biology to want to mate with someone who is healthy. It goes against nature to want to procreate with someone who is obviously ill. That's like someone saying to you that you are bad at sex because you don't want it with your partner who currently has a chicken pox infection. It's normal (and healthy) to be turned off by an unhealthy body.

compares "obesity" (which, to someone like you, is probably a size 12) to an infectious disease...

Yup. fatphobic incel troll is back!

When women don't want to have sex with a fat guy - "well of course, no duh, what do you expect?"

When men don't want to have sex with a fat woman - "EW HOW DARE YOU, YOU DISGUSTING FATPHOBIC INCEL TROLL!"

Aww, his widdle feefees got hurted!

No, when "men" compare body types they don't like to diseases, smart people call that nonsense out. Sorry not sorry.

It doesn’t hurt my feelings at all to point out female hypocrisy, solipsism, and hatred of men. I enjoy it! Could do it all day. Sorry not sorry.

Well then, I'm sorry by how empty you must feel on a thread that has exactly none of those things, poor boy.

The greatest thing about being a woman is the total lack of self-awareness. Or perhaps it's being smug about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Obesity is not a disease.

Obesity is a disease. Not all diseases are infectious. Obesity is a metabolic disease and it leads to all sorts of other diseases (like diabetes) as well as impairing the immune system and thus making the obese person more susceptible to infectious diseases.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
30 lbs overweight isn't a disorder. And no, sexually rejecting someone you claim to love because they've gained weight isn't "a normal reaction" at all.

You're vain. Just admit it.

Eh well women will sexually reject their husbands, who they claim to love, for any number of far more trivial reasons than his weight gain, so there's that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think most women just tolerate men.

Ok and most men only tolerate women because men want sex from them.

Suppress your lust and you’ll realize that 95% of women are boring, irritating, a waste of your time.

Wow....someone has been burned.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
30 lbs overweight isn't a disorder. And no, sexually rejecting someone you claim to love because they've gained weight isn't "a normal reaction" at all.

You're vain. Just admit it.

Eh well women will sexually reject their husbands, who they claim to love, for any number of far more trivial reasons than his weight gain, so there's that.

"weight gain" is a significant reason, but being a slacker around the house, not contributing to the childcare, coming home and expecting to be served instead of pitching in, and/or being an entitled jerk are all "more trivial reasons".

Bro, your priorities are a bit off...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is insulting.

I don’t want to have sex with my husband when he’s fat. I have never been attracted to women, yet I get the simulated experience of sleeping with a pregnant woman if I ever want to have sex. His beer belly is the size of a 6 month pregnant woman. It’s unattractive and kills the mood.

This has nothing to do with my insecurities or how I feel about my body. It’s insulting to suggest that not wanting to have sex with an obese guy is somehow “in my head.”

"the mood" is in your head. Get on top, get it from behind, get creative. If you're imagining "beer belly" and "6 month pregnant woman" and that's not doing it for you, well, that's your head. You can condition yourself to be attracted to all kinds of things.

-a woman

This is the dumbest most insane thing on this thread. No way can I close my eyes and think of England. I’m not Melanie. I’ll literally vomit.
-a woman

Squeamish people are bad in bed.

I’m not squeamish if you’re hot. But I’m not effing you if you’re fat. Sorry not sorry.

"My orgasm depends on your body" is a low-skill, sexually-immature mentality, for all parties

Get real.

Sorry you’re unattractive.

Sorry you're small-minded and a terrible lay!

Dude, it's basic biology to want to mate with someone who is healthy. It goes against nature to want to procreate with someone who is obviously ill. That's like someone saying to you that you are bad at sex because you don't want it with your partner who currently has a chicken pox infection. It's normal (and healthy) to be turned off by an unhealthy body.

compares "obesity" (which, to someone like you, is probably a size 12) to an infectious disease...

Yup. fatphobic incel troll is back!

When women don't want to have sex with a fat guy - "well of course, no duh, what do you expect?"

When men don't want to have sex with a fat woman - "EW HOW DARE YOU, YOU DISGUSTING FATPHOBIC INCEL TROLL!"

Aww, his widdle feefees got hurted!

No, when "men" compare body types they don't like to diseases, smart people call that nonsense out. Sorry not sorry.

It doesn’t hurt my feelings at all to point out female hypocrisy, solipsism, and hatred of men. I enjoy it! Could do it all day. Sorry not sorry.

Well then, I'm sorry by how empty you must feel on a thread that has exactly none of those things, poor boy.

The greatest thing about being a woman is the total lack of self-awareness. Or perhaps it's being smug about it.

Nah, that's apparently the only good thing about you, though. And it ain't much. Maybe stop projecting and go to therapy about it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sexually active husband of 24 years here. I kinda saw and heard about the post marriage/kids sex dought. This is what I did that seemed to help:

1. Before we got married we both read and talked about the book His Needs/Her Needs. This made it clear from the beginning the things she needed to not build resentment. I remindeded myself regularly of the things I had to do to meet her needs and did my best to stay on top of them. She did the same for me. Resentment was still built up over libido mismatch (in both directions).

There is literally nothing you can do to prevent a woman from feeling "resentment" because it is not the product of anything you do (or do not do) it is the product of her own neurotic distress and mental disorder.

this guy hasn't gotten laid in a long time, and just can't understand why...

seriously

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Obesity is not a disease.

Obesity is a disease. Not all diseases are infectious. Obesity is a metabolic disease and it leads to all sorts of other diseases (like diabetes) as well as impairing the immune system and thus making the obese person more susceptible to infectious diseases.

This is a thread about female sexual desire, not your fatphobia. Go off in the health forum, if that's what you're into.

Weird kink, IMO, but I shouldn't yuck your yum

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a husband, if you do these things, your wife will remain interested:

1. Do at least half of all child-related driving and watching, leaving your wife time for herself.
2. Do the dishes.
3. Make the beds.
4. Hire a cleaner.
5. Make plenty of money.
6. Help with meals.
7. Foreplay.

It's that easy.

I’m a woman, and I think it’s actually even easier than this. You don’t even have to do the dishes, meals, and childcare if you acknowledge that she’s doing it, and you think she’s amazing for it. And you don’t have to make a lot of money either.
Think about it, women go to visit men on conjugal visits in prison. Those guys aren’t doing anything on this list.

Here is the real list:

1). Tell her how great she is, with specifics. If she’s a kick-ass lawyer, say that. If she’s an amazing mother, say that. If she keeps your ADHD self organized and you would be lost without her, say that. If she’s fat, but you love her giant G-cups, say that.

2). Initiate sex a lot.

3). Don’t get upset or hurt when she turns you down. Accept it and move on with your day. Initiate again the next day.

4). Don’t get hurt if she asks you to do something different in bed. It’s not meant as a blow to your ego. Just do it.

This is very rapey and at what point does the woman actually initiate? It would suck to have to initiate all the time. It just shows the other party has no desire for you.

If you don’t get upset or manipulative when she turns you down, then you can assume that every time she has sex with you, she has desire for you.
Why else would she?

And if you are getting upset and pouty if she turns you down or doesn’t initiate, then you can assume that a good part of the reason she is initiating is because she wants a pleasant life, not because of any desire for you.

lol no. It is just “duty sex”. If she does not initiate she has no desire for you. Could you imagine being in a relationship like that for 5, 10 or 20 years. Yipes!
.

I guess I’m the opposite of your wife. It turns me on when my husband assertively initiates and tells me what to do.
If I’m initiating, it’s usually out of a sense that it’s been too long since we have had sex, and that it isn’t good for our marriage or our family as a whole, so I initiate.

For me, it’s much closer to “duty sex” when I initiate than when DH initiates.

I feel this way too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Obesity is not a disease.

Obesity is a disease. Not all diseases are infectious. Obesity is a metabolic disease and it leads to all sorts of other diseases (like diabetes) as well as impairing the immune system and thus making the obese person more susceptible to infectious diseases.

This is a thread about female sexual desire, not your fatphobia. Go off in the health forum, if that's what you're into.

Weird kink, IMO, but I shouldn't yuck your yum

yuk your yum that made me chuckle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is insulting.

I don’t want to have sex with my husband when he’s fat. I have never been attracted to women, yet I get the simulated experience of sleeping with a pregnant woman if I ever want to have sex. His beer belly is the size of a 6 month pregnant woman. It’s unattractive and kills the mood.

This has nothing to do with my insecurities or how I feel about my body. It’s insulting to suggest that not wanting to have sex with an obese guy is somehow “in my head.”

"the mood" is in your head. Get on top, get it from behind, get creative. If you're imagining "beer belly" and "6 month pregnant woman" and that's not doing it for you, well, that's your head. You can condition yourself to be attracted to all kinds of things.

-a woman

This is the dumbest most insane thing on this thread. No way can I close my eyes and think of England. I’m not Melanie. I’ll literally vomit.
-a woman

Squeamish people are bad in bed.

I’m not squeamish if you’re hot. But I’m not effing you if you’re fat. Sorry not sorry.

"My orgasm depends on your body" is a low-skill, sexually-immature mentality, for all parties

Get real.

Sorry you’re unattractive.

Sorry you're small-minded and a terrible lay!

Dude, it's basic biology to want to mate with someone who is healthy. It goes against nature to want to procreate with someone who is obviously ill. That's like someone saying to you that you are bad at sex because you don't want it with your partner who currently has a chicken pox infection. It's normal (and healthy) to be turned off by an unhealthy body.

compares "obesity" (which, to someone like you, is probably a size 12) to an infectious disease...

Yup. fatphobic incel troll is back!

I’m a woman. And obesity is a disorder. It’s not a healthy or normal way of being. It’s not a moral failing. But I don’t want to have sex with my DH after he gained 30lbs. That’s a normal reaction.

30 lbs overweight isn't a disorder. And no, sexually rejecting someone you claim to love because they've gained weight isn't "a normal reaction" at all.

You're vain. Just admit it.

The f^^k it isn't. You don't even differentiate between a 12 yo girl at 140 and a 55 yo man at 230. They aren't the same and you are so disingenuos that you will atempt to normalize it.

This country is in crisis. People are fat af. The Army declined the largest percentage of recruits in .... the history of.... Army recruiting. Diabetes is rampant in the youngest generation.

Stop making it Ok to be fat. You may as well be defending drunks. Just stop.

LOL you can always pick out the MAGA and while we are on that subject this administration literally has a drunk "overseeing" the department of defense. Sorry please continue with your little rant about obesity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Obesity is not a disease.

Obesity is a disease. Not all diseases are infectious. Obesity is a metabolic disease and it leads to all sorts of other diseases (like diabetes) as well as impairing the immune system and thus making the obese person more susceptible to infectious diseases.

This is a thread about female sexual desire, not your fatphobia. Go off in the health forum, if that's what you're into.

It's not a phobia because I'm not afraid of your flabby wrinkled body. I'm just disgusted by it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a husband, if you do these things, your wife will remain interested:

1. Do at least half of all child-related driving and watching, leaving your wife time for herself.
2. Do the dishes.
3. Make the beds.
4. Hire a cleaner.
5. Make plenty of money.
6. Help with meals.
7. Foreplay.

It's that easy.

I’m a woman, and I think it’s actually even easier than this. You don’t even have to do the dishes, meals, and childcare if you acknowledge that she’s doing it, and you think she’s amazing for it. And you don’t have to make a lot of money either.
Think about it, women go to visit men on conjugal visits in prison. Those guys aren’t doing anything on this list.

Here is the real list:

1). Tell her how great she is, with specifics. If she’s a kick-ass lawyer, say that. If she’s an amazing mother, say that. If she keeps your ADHD self organized and you would be lost without her, say that. If she’s fat, but you love her giant G-cups, say that.

2). Initiate sex a lot.

3). Don’t get upset or hurt when she turns you down. Accept it and move on with your day. Initiate again the next day.

4). Don’t get hurt if she asks you to do something different in bed. It’s not meant as a blow to your ego. Just do it.

This is very rapey and at what point does the woman actually initiate? It would suck to have to initiate all the time. It just shows the other party has no desire for you.

If you don’t get upset or manipulative when she turns you down, then you can assume that every time she has sex with you, she has desire for you.
Why else would she?

And if you are getting upset and pouty if she turns you down or doesn’t initiate, then you can assume that a good part of the reason she is initiating is because she wants a pleasant life, not because of any desire for you.

lol no. It is just “duty sex”. If she does not initiate she has no desire for you. Could you imagine being in a relationship like that for 5, 10 or 20 years. Yipes!
.

I guess I’m the opposite of your wife. It turns me on when my husband assertively initiates and tells me what to do.
If I’m initiating, it’s usually out of a sense that it’s been too long since we have had sex, and that it isn’t good for our marriage or our family as a whole, so I initiate.

For me, it’s much closer to “duty sex” when I initiate than when DH initiates.

Why would you ever initiate sex? How would you feel if your DH said the same thing to you?

I initiate sex because it’s been too long, and I feel like our relationship is better, our household is happier, and it’s ultimately better for our children to be raised in a household where their parents are happy and sexually active with each other.
I want them to think that it’s normal for married people to have sex and to pursue relationships where that happens.

If my husband told me that he sometimes initiates for that reason, that would be okay with me. Why wouldn’t it be?

You are one of the few rational women on this board.