Location sharing with spouse

[Anonymous]

This one is simple…..

If your spouse or s/o has an issue w/you knowing their location at all times then there is something fundamental that they are trying to hide.😶‍🌫️

[Anonymous]

For me this is a safety issue first and foremost. I absolutely want my husband to know where I am and vice versa. Same with our kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me this is a safety issue first and foremost. I absolutely want my husband to know where I am and vice versa. Same with our kids.

+1 Teen gets their driver’s license and these weirdos are just like “Best of luck to you!” Back in the day, before this technology, caring parents white-knuckled it until their new drivers came home. So thankful for location sharing. It absolutely reduces anxiety tremendously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me this is a safety issue first and foremost. I absolutely want my husband to know where I am and vice versa. Same with our kids.

+1 Teen gets their driver’s license and these weirdos are just like “Best of luck to you!” Back in the day, before this technology, caring parents white-knuckled it until their new drivers came home. So thankful for location sharing. It absolutely reduces anxiety tremendously.

Yes, how ever did people make it through life without having the option of constantly knowing where people were at every minute of the day?!? We are SO much safer now with people driving while looking at their phones so they can track DH's pit stop at the liquor store!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This one is simple…..

If your spouse or s/o has an issue w/you knowing their location at all times then there is something fundamental that they are trying to hide.😶‍🌫️

I gave nothing sinister to hide, but I don’t like sharing my location . Sometimes I just want to be alone and no, I don’t want to have a therapy-speak conversation about it. I need some privacy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me this is a safety issue first and foremost. I absolutely want my husband to know where I am and vice versa. Same with our kids.

You don't know where they are you know where their phone is

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This one is simple…..

If your spouse or s/o has an issue w/you knowing their location at all times then there is something fundamental that they are trying to hide.😶‍🌫️

I gave nothing sinister to hide, but I don’t like sharing my location . Sometimes I just want to be alone and no, I don’t want to have a therapy-speak conversation about it. I need some privacy.

Agree with this.

It’s like phones. I have no problem with my SO hopping on my phone when needed, like if he needs to pull up directions for me when I’m driving. But I would not like it if he constantly wanted to check my phone throughout the day for no real reason. If he’s concerned, he can talk to me like an adult, not monitor me like a parent.

Nothing to hide (except perhaps my excessive time on DCUM), but I don’t want to be treated like a child. And it’s actually very unhealthy to regulate your own emotions by monitoring others.

If you need location sharing to feel secure, there’s a much deeper issue going on. Feeling secure is a result of conversations and working through your own issues. Not of being hyper vigilant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me this is a safety issue first and foremost. I absolutely want my husband to know where I am and vice versa. Same with our kids.

You don't know where they are you know where their phone is

That’s the double edged sword of location tracking, yea? Really easy to leave your phone where you’re supposed to be so the spouse or parent never knows what you’re truly up to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me this is a safety issue first and foremost. I absolutely want my husband to know where I am and vice versa. Same with our kids.

You don't know where they are you know where their phone is

This. Like many people in the DC area DH keeps his phone off while he's at work. At least he always picks up when I call his landline.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can only think of suspect reasons NOT to share. A controlling spouse you are hiding from, some kind of unhealthy boundary issues in your relationship you haven't addressed, laziness, doing things you shouldn't be doing or aren't willing to share.

And at its very core, it's a safety issue.

Honestly, if you have children, especially kids who are driving age, and you don't have "find my" or life 360 with your whole family, why not?

Somehow, dozens if not hundreds of generations survived without "Life 360." God, it even sounds like some dystopian invention.

I honestly just don't understand how you can twist it so negatively.

For people with normal healthy boundaries and relationships, "find my iPhone" is not abusive. Or dystopian! They are helpful from a safety and convenience perspective.

For you to go there says more about you than it does about the software.

I disagree, I think it says more about how much of ourselves we've sacrificed to tech companies in the name of "convenience" and "safety."

Fine, but that has nothing to do with sharing your location with your spouse.

If you want to use Door Dash, you're agreeing to share your location with tech companies. Same with a million other apps. That is a completely different issue than sharing it with your family.

I don't use DoorDash because I think these delivery services are ruining the restaurant industry. I either cook or I get my ass off the sofa and go to a restaurant.

NP
I’ve never used them or a ride share.

Cool, cool. You must not travel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with the PP that constant access “just in case” is driving a lot of anxiety.

I recently spend a weekend away from home and I purposely didn’t bring my smart phone or laptop. I was away from my kids (they were with their dad) so I did worry something would happen and I wouldn’t be reachable.

But it was glorious knowing people didn’t have access to me anytime they wanted me. I didn’t realize how constantly having my phone on me “just in case” was making me feel anxious.

I don’t share my location with my current partner, and honestly, I mostly ignore texts and calls during the day now. Often when I go out I don’t even bring my phone. I feel smothered when I feel I need to be on call all the time in case someone needs something or even just wants to check on me.

If it’s truly because of groceries or wanting to see when they’ll be home…why? Does it really matter if they’re home at 5:30 vs 5:45? Can you survive without the groceries? I just don’t think sacrificing brainpower from the constant notifications is worth it for a gallon of milk.

I think you may need to talk to someone about healthy phone usage. Yesterday I had a crazy day at work so at 6:30 I put my phone on sleep for the rest of the night. When I woke up this morning I had texts that had been sent that I could read and respond to now. My kids and husband were all home by that point so everyone who needed to know where I was could find me without my phone. Anyone else needing to get in touch with me in the event of an emergency could have called twice and broken through.

I actually get very few notifications on my phone because I don't like being interrupted. I keep my phone on DND most of the day, with exceptions for the contacts I would like to hear from. I don't get notifications for email, social media, weather, sports, or any of the other millions of things people seem to have making their phones ding all the time.

However, if I realize I forgot to tell my husband we need milk, I can easily check to see if he's still at the store. Then if he has already left I'm not texting him while he's driving or calling him while he's loading groceries into the car. No stress for him. Very little stress for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This one is simple…..

If your spouse or s/o has an issue w/you knowing their location at all times then there is something fundamental that they are trying to hide.😶‍🌫️

I gave nothing sinister to hide, but I don’t like sharing my location . Sometimes I just want to be alone and no, I don’t want to have a therapy-speak conversation about it. I need some privacy.

So at these times you leave your phone elsewhere, right? Because if so, then anyone searching for your location wouldn't know where you were anyway. And if not, then you're not actually alone. At the very least, I bet Mark Zuckerberg knows exactly where you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This one is simple…..

If your spouse or s/o has an issue w/you knowing their location at all times then there is something fundamental that they are trying to hide.😶‍🌫️

I gave nothing sinister to hide, but I don’t like sharing my location . Sometimes I just want to be alone and no, I don’t want to have a therapy-speak conversation about it. I need some privacy.

Agree with this.

It’s like phones. I have no problem with my SO hopping on my phone when needed, like if he needs to pull up directions for me when I’m driving. But I would not like it if he constantly wanted to check my phone throughout the day for no real reason. If he’s concerned, he can talk to me like an adult, not monitor me like a parent.

Nothing to hide (except perhaps my excessive time on DCUM), but I don’t want to be treated like a child. And it’s actually very unhealthy to regulate your own emotions by monitoring others.

If you need location sharing to feel secure, there’s a much deeper issue going on. Feeling secure is a result of conversations and working through your own issues. Not of being hyper vigilant.

It's almost like you can't actually understand that some people use the location for the exact same reason you use your husband's phone. I have my husband's password but never go through his phone. I also have his location but look at it once maybe every couple of months. It doesn't make me feel any more secure knowing where he is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This one is simple…..

If your spouse or s/o has an issue w/you knowing their location at all times then there is something fundamental that they are trying to hide.😶‍🌫️

I gave nothing sinister to hide, but I don’t like sharing my location . Sometimes I just want to be alone and no, I don’t want to have a therapy-speak conversation about it. I need some privacy.

So at these times you leave your phone elsewhere, right? Because if so, then anyone searching for your location wouldn't know where you were anyway. And if not, then you're not actually alone. At the very least, I bet Mark Zuckerberg knows exactly where you are.

Meaning I don’t want to explain to anyone why I’m driving aimlessly for 30 minutes. I doubt Zuckerberg is asking me for any explanations. But you knew that already and knew what I meant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This one is simple…..

If your spouse or s/o has an issue w/you knowing their location at all times then there is something fundamental that they are trying to hide.😶‍🌫️

I gave nothing sinister to hide, but I don’t like sharing my location . Sometimes I just want to be alone and no, I don’t want to have a therapy-speak conversation about it. I need some privacy.

Agree with this.

It’s like phones. I have no problem with my SO hopping on my phone when needed, like if he needs to pull up directions for me when I’m driving. But I would not like it if he constantly wanted to check my phone throughout the day for no real reason. If he’s concerned, he can talk to me like an adult, not monitor me like a parent.

Nothing to hide (except perhaps my excessive time on DCUM), but I don’t want to be treated like a child. And it’s actually very unhealthy to regulate your own emotions by monitoring others.

If you need location sharing to feel secure, there’s a much deeper issue going on. Feeling secure is a result of conversations and working through your own issues. Not of being hyper vigilant.

It's almost like you can't actually understand that some people use the location for the exact same reason you use your husband's phone. I have my husband's password but never go through his phone. I also have his location but look at it once maybe every couple of months. It doesn't make me feel any more secure knowing where he is.

It’s almost like you can’t actually understand I was responding to someone who said “if your spouse has an issue with you knowing their location at all times then there is something they are trying to hide” and then agreed with someone that I want some privacy.

Anyone who wants to know where their spouse is 24/7 or else they believe the spouse is up to something nefarious has major issues. This is very different than someone who can take or leave location tracking.