In-laws and their kids eat all our food

[Anonymous]

Has opnever said how long these people will stay? Are they overnight guests?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I invite multi-day houseguests to help themselves in the kitchen, but if I invited a family over for an afternoon cookout I’d think they were very rude if they started raiding the fridge and pantry.

Especially if they cleared out all the single serve stuff we use for kid’s lunches and snacks at games. Those single serve chocolate milk, yogurts, applesauce , quinoa cups etc are pricey but packaged in an easy way for lunches. I can see rude teens clearing those out as the serving sizes aren’t large. There is no reason why ribs, fried chicken, burgers, hotdogs, fruit salad and other sides is not enough for everyone.

I have an aunt and uncle, who we no longer invite to our house, that do this as adults. They eat tons at dinner. The uncle loads his plate with three times what everyone else takes of anything high value. They both expect lots of leftovers and bring their own Tupperware. They help themself to whatever is in the fridge. Aunt once said oooh goodie, there’s Brie and shoved the entire round in her bag. They are not poor, in fact they are comfortably UMC and have tons of savings because they are so scammy frugal.

My aunt and uncle are like this too! Plus their two failure to launch sons. They will get out a ziploc bag and start shoveling food in to take home before the party is even over. I made a prime rib with a pound of meat for each person and they ate it all along with all the sides and sniffed through the fridge for more. My aunt laughs and says "you know how hungry boys are" though said boys are on their 30s. Best of all, when we go to their house the food is barebones portions and no alcohol is served though they're happy to drink mine. We have to run to the convenience store to fill out the meal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here! I am enjoying this, even for those who are slamming me. Believe me, we have more than enough food: six racks of ribs, 6 pounds of 80/20 burger meat, packs of Nathan's hot dogs, fruit salad ( well we will have it) , potato salad, beer, wine, soda, juice, Fried chicken, watermelon, the works. I am telling you though, these kids are bottomless pits and what generally happens is that they start eating like cups of applesauce or yogurts, or fruits, chips, etc that we don't even put out and are meant for school lunches. We also have one kid who is an athlete in training and likes to have certain things around- rice cakes, quinoa in cups, peanut butter, chocolate milk etc, and all of that gets annihilated too. I just think it is kind of rude to watch your kids sack someone else's pantry family or not .

I agree it's rude. My teenage athletes go places all the time where food is served and they learn to eat what is provided (which is typically is a fine amount) and if they are still hungry later they get a snack at home. Do people who disagree that it's rude allow their teens to buy 3 meals at restaurants? I doubt it - they eat what they are served. It's not like these kids are being starved. As long as you have a reasonable amount of food, and it sounds like you do, then they shouldn't have any reason to raid your cupboards.

The difference is people are at a restaurant for 1-2 hrs. OP has not said how long this event lasts, could be most of the day.

That misses the point. OP has given a list of food they are providing and it is a ton of food; a perfectly acceptable amount. Hosts shouldn't have to have endless bowls of stuff just to appease people who want to eat and eat and eat. With that amount of food, even athlete teens should be good - the kids should be able to eat a normal amount and wait to get home for a snack. You simply don't go start raiding someone's cupboards who is hosting you for an afternoon, even relatives.

Let’s be honest too. The kids aren’t raiding the pantry because they are hungry or athletes. They are raiding the pantry because they like snack food. So rude!

How do you know OPs kids didn't invite the cousins to help themselves?

+1 I wonder if all the kids are hanging out indoors playing video games. Then it’s just easier for them to go grab snacks from the pantry instead of going outside for food. If that’s the case, OP should have a tray of picnic food and snacks they can take from indoors and make sure they know when the food will be ready outdoors. Also have outdoor games and activities for the kids so they’re not just indoors playing video games.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I invite multi-day houseguests to help themselves in the kitchen, but if I invited a family over for an afternoon cookout I’d think they were very rude if they started raiding the fridge and pantry.

We obviously have different family cultures.

Yes and there is nothing wrong with pp culture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am OP. I am a guy lol

We don't believe you, troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here! I am enjoying this, even for those who are slamming me. Believe me, we have more than enough food: six racks of ribs, 6 pounds of 80/20 burger meat, packs of Nathan's hot dogs, fruit salad ( well we will have it) , potato salad, beer, wine, soda, juice, Fried chicken, watermelon, the works. I am telling you though, these kids are bottomless pits and what generally happens is that they start eating like cups of applesauce or yogurts, or fruits, chips, etc that we don't even put out and are meant for school lunches. We also have one kid who is an athlete in training and likes to have certain things around- rice cakes, quinoa in cups, peanut butter, chocolate milk etc, and all of that gets annihilated too. I just think it is kind of rude to watch your kids sack someone else's pantry family or not .

I agree it's rude. My teenage athletes go places all the time where food is served and they learn to eat what is provided (which is typically is a fine amount) and if they are still hungry later they get a snack at home. Do people who disagree that it's rude allow their teens to buy 3 meals at restaurants? I doubt it - they eat what they are served. It's not like these kids are being starved. As long as you have a reasonable amount of food, and it sounds like you do, then they shouldn't have any reason to raid your cupboards.

The difference is people are at a restaurant for 1-2 hrs. OP has not said how long this event lasts, could be most of the day.

That misses the point. OP has given a list of food they are providing and it is a ton of food; a perfectly acceptable amount. Hosts shouldn't have to have endless bowls of stuff just to appease people who want to eat and eat and eat. With that amount of food, even athlete teens should be good - the kids should be able to eat a normal amount and wait to get home for a snack. You simply don't go start raiding someone's cupboards who is hosting you for an afternoon, even relatives.

We don't at all know it's a ton of food. There could be 4 burgers, 6 hotdogs, and one chicken for 20 people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am OP. I am a guy lol

We don't believe you, troll.

Oh, I believe it is entirely possible. The reducing hospitality to a dollar amount definitely could be a man or a woman, but in my experience more likely something a man would do.

[Anonymous]

Make tons of cheap but filling food—potato salad, pasta salad, baked beans etc and have a couple of melons and a couple huge bags of chips and dips. Have a couple dessert (doesn’t matter if homemade or store bought) and 2-3 bunches of bananas. Assume 2-3 burgers and dogs per person (at least for the teens) and plan accordingly. You can freeze whatever meat doesn’t get used.

[Anonymous]

If you still want to host, go to Aldis. Seriously. Snack foods there are especially cheap. Think $1.50 for a box of 10 granola bars. Girl Scout cookie dupes can likewise be $1 something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I invite multi-day houseguests to help themselves in the kitchen, but if I invited a family over for an afternoon cookout I’d think they were very rude if they started raiding the fridge and pantry.

Especially if they cleared out all the single serve stuff we use for kid’s lunches and snacks at games. Those single serve chocolate milk, yogurts, applesauce , quinoa cups etc are pricey but packaged in an easy way for lunches. I can see rude teens clearing those out as the serving sizes aren’t large. There is no reason why ribs, fried chicken, burgers, hotdogs, fruit salad and other sides is not enough for everyone.

I have an aunt and uncle, who we no longer invite to our house, that do this as adults. They eat tons at dinner. The uncle loads his plate with three times what everyone else takes of anything high value. They both expect lots of leftovers and bring their own Tupperware. They help themself to whatever is in the fridge. Aunt once said oooh goodie, there’s Brie and shoved the entire round in her bag. They are not poor, in fact they are comfortably UMC and have tons of savings because they are so scammy frugal.

My aunt and uncle are like this too! Plus their two failure to launch sons. They will get out a ziploc bag and start shoveling food in to take home before the party is even over. I made a prime rib with a pound of meat for each person and they ate it all along with all the sides and sniffed through the fridge for more. My aunt laughs and says "you know how hungry boys are" though said boys are on their 30s. Best of all, when we go to their house the food is barebones portions and no alcohol is served though they're happy to drink mine. We have to run to the convenience store to fill out the meal.

This is totally different from OP’s situation.

[Anonymous]

We have a spreadsheet! Just our adult children but we all agreed to divvy up the supplies/food. Works great. Because we’re hosting and the parents we buy more but still.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am OP. I am a guy lol

Then take your brother aside and say “dude, contribute.”

[Anonymous]

You sound cheap. Maybe you should not host. These are your nieces and nephews and you are upset that they are eating your food????

I always do an extra grocery run and buy the good stuff and stock up when we have guests. We have teens so our guests are teens. I get Costco sized everything expecting everyone to eat.

My kids’ friends do raid our pantry and I don’t mind. I guess it could be rude if they just helped themselves. I would think family is welcome to anything.

[Anonymous]

I grew up poor and my mom would offer everything in our house to our guests. You don’t sound like a good host.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I invite multi-day houseguests to help themselves in the kitchen, but if I invited a family over for an afternoon cookout I’d think they were very rude if they started raiding the fridge and pantry.

Especially if they cleared out all the single serve stuff we use for kid’s lunches and snacks at games. Those single serve chocolate milk, yogurts, applesauce , quinoa cups etc are pricey but packaged in an easy way for lunches. I can see rude teens clearing those out as the serving sizes aren’t large. There is no reason why ribs, fried chicken, burgers, hotdogs, fruit salad and other sides is not enough for everyone.

I have an aunt and uncle, who we no longer invite to our house, that do this as adults. They eat tons at dinner. The uncle loads his plate with three times what everyone else takes of anything high value. They both expect lots of leftovers and bring their own Tupperware. They help themself to whatever is in the fridge. Aunt once said oooh goodie, there’s Brie and shoved the entire round in her bag. They are not poor, in fact they are comfortably UMC and have tons of savings because they are so scammy frugal.

My aunt and uncle are like this too! Plus their two failure to launch sons. They will get out a ziploc bag and start shoveling food in to take home before the party is even over. I made a prime rib with a pound of meat for each person and they ate it all along with all the sides and sniffed through the fridge for more. My aunt laughs and says "you know how hungry boys are" though said boys are on their 30s. Best of all, when we go to their house the food is barebones portions and no alcohol is served though they're happy to drink mine. We have to run to the convenience store to fill out the meal.

This is totally different from OP’s situation.

It’s really not different at all. There is ample food at the party which they are eating but they decide to empty out all the other snack food simply because they want it not because they need it. It’s greedy gross behavior without any sense of manners.