In laws wanting to use new vacation home

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would let my siblings stay there. But I’d have a rule that they can’t invite other people to stay there with them. And they’d have to pay the cleaning fee plus cover utilities.

And this makes you and unreasonable person.

h

No, it makes me very reasonable. I am happy to share but shouldn’t have to go out of pocket to do so. And let’s be real. Nobody’s going to clean the house at the end of their weeklong vacation, when they are packing up, I’m trying to get out of there. I will provide a house to people that is very clean, and I would like them to leave it the same way. I also don’t want to have to pay for other people‘s electricity and air-conditioning, etc. Otherwise, I am giving them an almost-free, nice place to stay that is going to save them a ton of money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is an excellent example of a thread that brings out the nasty of DCUM. Why are so many of you so awful, ungenerous, and suspicious about people, especially family and friends.

We have a large second home a couple hours drive from DC. It's a great place to visit, on many acres with a pool and hot tub etc. Just a great respite. And we have a large family.

When we're not there, we let many people use it. We have overstocked everything -- toiletries, etc. -- so we don't run out of stock. We have a second refrigerator full of beverages. We have cleaners come in. We don't charge anybody a dime for anything, ever. And when the house is being used and someone asks to use it, we just say "sorry, it's used that week let's come up with another."

Sure, on occasion something might break or you might come back and be puzzled about the condition the place was left in. But life is short. You roll with it.

Seriously, what happened to so many of you in your past that you have to be so uptight?

Not everyone wants to be like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an excellent example of a thread that brings out the nasty of DCUM. Why are so many of you so awful, ungenerous, and suspicious about people, especially family and friends.

We have a large second home a couple hours drive from DC. It's a great place to visit, on many acres with a pool and hot tub etc. Just a great respite. And we have a large family.

When we're not there, we let many people use it. We have overstocked everything -- toiletries, etc. -- so we don't run out of stock. We have a second refrigerator full of beverages. We have cleaners come in. We don't charge anybody a dime for anything, ever. And when the house is being used and someone asks to use it, we just say "sorry, it's used that week let's come up with another."

Sure, on occasion something might break or you might come back and be puzzled about the condition the place was left in. But life is short. You roll with it.

Seriously, what happened to so many of you in your past that you have to be so uptight?

Not everyone wants to be like you.

And I sure am glad I’m not like everyone else here—nor are any of the people I know. Some of you lead very sad lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an excellent example of a thread that brings out the nasty of DCUM. Why are so many of you so awful, ungenerous, and suspicious about people, especially family and friends.

We have a large second home a couple hours drive from DC. It's a great place to visit, on many acres with a pool and hot tub etc. Just a great respite. And we have a large family.

When we're not there, we let many people use it. We have overstocked everything -- toiletries, etc. -- so we don't run out of stock. We have a second refrigerator full of beverages. We have cleaners come in. We don't charge anybody a dime for anything, ever. And when the house is being used and someone asks to use it, we just say "sorry, it's used that week let's come up with another."

Sure, on occasion something might break or you might come back and be puzzled about the condition the place was left in. But life is short. You roll with it.

Seriously, what happened to so many of you in your past that you have to be so uptight?

Not everyone wants to be like you.

And I sure am glad I’m not like everyone else here—nor are any of the people I know. Some of you lead very sad lives.

If running your second home almost like a B&B gives you pleasure, that’s wonderful. It’s not sad when others don’t enjoy that, and many people are very generous to their friends and family in other ways. Because different people like different things.

Many potential guests also prefer staying at hotels rather than at a friend’s or family member’s vacant home, for a variety of reasons.

Life is too short to spend your free time doing things you don’t actually enjoy.

[Anonymous]

You should allow them to use it as well. They are family, and you are not utilizing it at that particular moment. Is there a specific concern?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man, you people are really something else. Not only do you allow your family to use your empty vacation home -- you should actively offer it, and without expecting or demanding cleaning fees, paying for utilities etc. They're family. Presumably they return the favor in other ways. No need to keep score.

You're a child. A clueless child who clearly owns nothing and has no experience dealing with other people and and how they treat other people's property.

Clueless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. If we are there and we invite them, then yes. If they invite themselves or ask to use it when we aren’t there - then no. This goes for everyone.

You're nice.

You're dumb.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are on a slippery slope. Now is the time to establish rules with extended family. We don't allow anybody there if we're not there.

Aren't you nice.

NP. Maybe this isn’t the nicest, but it’s correct. My parents had a beach house and allowed friends and family to use it. People are shockingly entitled - after the first visit almost all would ask to come again the next year. Family also crawled out of the woodwork, and people started asking to use it for a girl’s get together, bachelorette parties and even a honeymoon. My mom had trouble saying no after she had said yes to some people, and it got to the point that her own children couldn’t visit there in the summer bc it was booked up with friends and family. And even though we loved these people, they would break things, stain things, use up supplies and not replace them, etc. It eventually became such a headache that my parents sold the house.

Like PP I ended up selling my second home also. It makes me sad but I had no choice. I would not say no to my sister staying in it.
The problem was then all of her friends wanted to stay in it. My sister also put an illegal immigrant from Medellin Colombia in it. He stayed for 6 months. She did not tell me about the illegal immigrant until after he had been there for 45 days.

My second home was also in an area that it was very difficult to get house cleaners or repair people. There was a real shortage.

Also....check your insurance for the second home. If you bought it as a second home and insured it that way you cannot take money for it.

Go away MAGA

You're a fool. I'm a liberal dem and have experienced something similar. People, even family, will treat your stuff with much less care than you can believe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are all of you really this miserable in real life?

These are not real people. They are play acting how they would act in real life if they had a 2nd home while in reality they don't even own a single home.

You're full of shite. Many people in this area own second homes and have faced the reality that friends and family often resent your good fortune and treat your stuff like garbage. It's a feeding frenzy for the entitled. You clearly are the type that resents people who have more than you. Grow up and get over it. There is always someone who has more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are all of you really this miserable in real life?

These are not real people. They are play acting how they would act in real life if they had a 2nd home while in reality they don't even own a single home.

You're full of shite. Many people in this area own second homes and have faced the reality that friends and family often resent your good fortune and treat your stuff like garbage. It's a feeding frenzy for the entitled. You clearly are the type that resents people who have more than you. Grow up and get over it. There is always someone who has more.

Your "good fortune"? Just admit you're some kind of new money clown trying to fit in and are embarrassed of where you came from.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Who is supposed to clean after the stay (laundry, dishes, tidying) and pay for the utilities? I cannot imagine traveling out of town to clean a vacation home after someone stayed there for free. If you rent it out, sure, then those things are already taken care of and you could offer a subsidized rate.

It’s not just the cleaning, it’s using up supplies like paper towels, tp and bottled water without replacing them, or using pantry items and eating snacks, it’s leaving dirty towels and bed linens or even clean linens but expecting the owner to remake the beds, it’s keeping the A/C at 68 or the heat at 72 because the borrower doesn’t get the bill, it’s leaving the pool heater on for a week straight because again, they don’t get the bill . . .

For me the concern is the assumptions people would make. It's not uncommon for people to begin to feel entitled to the house after they've had a few free visits. That can cause all kinds of rifts - like a friend or neighbor assuming they have an established week when you have plans of your own. People are rude an entitled now and that is why we have the crazy posters who are so offended that people don't want to share their second homes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We recently acquired a vacation home. We are not renting it out. We let BIL use it once. Now he wants to go again.

Do you let your family use your home whenever they want?

We won’t be there and not use it for at least another month.

We let trusted close family and friends use the house if our immediate family isn’t using it. My sister and her family/friends left the place trashed and with weird damage once so they’re not allowed over unless it’s an extended family retreat.

We usually ask for $525/week to cover utilities and property taxes/wear and tear (regardless if it’s peak or non peak season). Yes our house is empty a lot of the time and walking distance to the beach - no you can not just stay there for free indefinitely.

This is how we approach it. Close family and friends can stay, but can lose the privilege if they aren't considerate or respectful. Thus far, it hasn't been an issue. Have never had to ask, people always offer the cleaning fee. People also always feel very bad about any damage they do (which has been minimal) and offer to pay to repair it. Depending on what it is, we sometimes take them up on it.

Listen to yourself, would you? "Close family and friends can stay, but can lose the privilege if they aren't considerate or respectful." Who do you think you are, the Queen of England? I'm sure glad you're not my "close family." You are insufferable.

WTF? Why do you think you are entitled to use other people’s properties how you please! Of course the owners can decide not to let you use it again! You are such a pig in your attitude!

Right now I am picturing you typing that in a double wide wearing a moo moo with a cigarette dangling out of your mouth.

I'm not prior poster but every one of us knows you are describing yourself. You're just like the poster who read about some young influencer who had a house they inherited from a granmother who was posting all over the internet that she was furious that is was possible to inherit a home. She can't afford one and is insanely jealous that someone else inherited one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an excellent example of a thread that brings out the nasty of DCUM. Why are so many of you so awful, ungenerous, and suspicious about people, especially family and friends.

We have a large second home a couple hours drive from DC. It's a great place to visit, on many acres with a pool and hot tub etc. Just a great respite. And we have a large family.

When we're not there, we let many people use it. We have overstocked everything -- toiletries, etc. -- so we don't run out of stock. We have a second refrigerator full of beverages. We have cleaners come in. We don't charge anybody a dime for anything, ever. And when the house is being used and someone asks to use it, we just say "sorry, it's used that week let's come up with another."

Sure, on occasion something might break or you might come back and be puzzled about the condition the place was left in. But life is short. You roll with it.

Seriously, what happened to so many of you in your past that you have to be so uptight?

Not everyone wants to be like you.

She isn't even like that. The fake posters are the ones who are so angry that people don't share everything they have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an excellent example of a thread that brings out the nasty of DCUM. Why are so many of you so awful, ungenerous, and suspicious about people, especially family and friends.

We have a large second home a couple hours drive from DC. It's a great place to visit, on many acres with a pool and hot tub etc. Just a great respite. And we have a large family.

When we're not there, we let many people use it. We have overstocked everything -- toiletries, etc. -- so we don't run out of stock. We have a second refrigerator full of beverages. We have cleaners come in. We don't charge anybody a dime for anything, ever. And when the house is being used and someone asks to use it, we just say "sorry, it's used that week let's come up with another."

Sure, on occasion something might break or you might come back and be puzzled about the condition the place was left in. But life is short. You roll with it.

Seriously, what happened to so many of you in your past that you have to be so uptight?

Not everyone wants to be like you.

She isn't even like that. The fake posters are the ones who are so angry that people don't share everything they have.

+1 - bitter and jealous of people that own vacation homes. Jeff needs to do something about the bots flooding this site.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are all of you really this miserable in real life?

These are not real people. They are play acting how they would act in real life if they had a 2nd home while in reality they don't even own a single home.

You're full of shite. Many people in this area own second homes and have faced the reality that friends and family often resent your good fortune and treat your stuff like garbage. It's a feeding frenzy for the entitled. You clearly are the type that resents people who have more than you. Grow up and get over it. There is always someone who has more.

This!