Eye-opening new study on the harms of divorce

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You actually said why are people being so defensive while literally attacking people for not being sensitive to their kid’s needs. You have major issues. I guess you walk around judging half the population in your narrow view of the world, because half the adults you come in contact with are divorced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find that marrying a quality person and being a thoughtful spouse has a 100% success rate. There are no people on either side of the family that are divorced.

Having a divorce definitely increases the risk of the children getting divorced.

Correlation or causation, though? As many posters have pointed out, it's actually very hard to parse the data, because there's no way to make an apples-to-apples comparison.

What are you smoking? This is one of the easiest data points to find, which you’ll find they have if you’d read any study. “Kids from X neighborhood, kids from X high school, kids whose parents made X amount, kids whose parents were X as a career.” The ability to parse the data is almost limitless and all things being equal kids with divorced parents are doomed to fail at a rate SUBSTANTIALLY more than their equal peers. This isn’t hard people! Do you divorced folk not know how to read?!

How would you design the study that compares couples who divorce to those who are just as unhappy, in relationships that are just as dysfunctional, but stay married?

They have learned to compartmentalize what exactly happiness is and wouldn’t be able to recognize it, anyway.
Happily married people will benefit the kids but if 50 percent get divorced, I’d bet another 30 percent stay married and aren’t happy in the marriage, but stay for kids and that’s the worst thing you should do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You suck as a person which isn’t good for your kids to see either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You actually said why are people being so defensive while literally attacking people for not being sensitive to their kid’s needs. You have major issues. I guess you walk around judging half the population in your narrow view of the world, because half the adults you come in contact with are divorced.

I think some of the folks attacking divorced people are protesting too much, you know? People who are happily married don’t usually feel the need to be so judgy about divorced people.

[Anonymous]

It isn’t just about money. Even if both parents are well off financially, it’s STILL hard on kids. Once parents divorce there is a huge shift in energy and resources from the parents raising their kids to focusing on dating. Online dating, in person dating, nurturing a new relationship are all very time consuming. Then add in the new dynamic of the partners kids, or if parents have more kids with new partners. This all takes resources away from kids. Resources are more than just money. Kids of divorce no longer have 2 parents that are 100% focused on them and their well being all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You actually said why are people being so defensive while literally attacking people for not being sensitive to their kid’s needs. You have major issues. I guess you walk around judging half the population in your narrow view of the world, because half the adults you come in contact with are divorced.

Bingo, they are unhappy and are lashing out. Rich people don’t normally need to tell us they are rich, either.

I think some of the folks attacking divorced people are protesting too much, you know? People who are happily married don’t usually feel the need to be so judgy about divorced people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You actually said why are people being so defensive while literally attacking people for not being sensitive to their kid’s needs. You have major issues. I guess you walk around judging half the population in your narrow view of the world, because half the adults you come in contact with are divorced.

I think some of the folks attacking divorced people are protesting too much, you know? People who are happily married don’t usually feel the need to be so judgy about divorced people.

Plus a million

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It isn’t just about money. Even if both parents are well off financially, it’s STILL hard on kids. Once parents divorce there is a huge shift in energy and resources from the parents raising their kids to focusing on dating. Online dating, in person dating, nurturing a new relationship are all very time consuming. Then add in the new dynamic of the partners kids, or if parents have more kids with new partners. This all takes resources away from kids. Resources are more than just money. Kids of divorce no longer have 2 parents that are 100% focused on them and their well being all the time.

Shift in energy? Do unhappy married people that stay for the kids have any concept of what kind of 24 hour negative energy their child is prone to every day. If you’re happy, your kid will thrive, and yes in separate households, if you’re in an unhappy marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You suck as a person which isn’t good for your kids to see either.

As I said, defensive and defective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It isn’t just about money. Even if both parents are well off financially, it’s STILL hard on kids. Once parents divorce there is a huge shift in energy and resources from the parents raising their kids to focusing on dating. Online dating, in person dating, nurturing a new relationship are all very time consuming. Then add in the new dynamic of the partners kids, or if parents have more kids with new partners. This all takes resources away from kids. Resources are more than just money. Kids of divorce no longer have 2 parents that are 100% focused on them and their well being all the time.

You do know that not everyone jumps back into dating right? It’s been about a year for me and I do not see myself dating anytime soon, specifically for the reasons listed above. I’m spending my energy being fully present and engaged since dad only wants to come around every two weeks. I can’t imagine having enough energy to give to finding a new partner and maintaining a new relationship. Maybe I’ll feel differently once my child is older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You suck as a person which isn’t good for your kids to see either.

As I said, defensive and defective.

Go work on your marriage, it probably really needs it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You suck as a person which isn’t good for your kids to see either.

As I said, defensive and defective.

Nope, it’s the unhappy married people such as yourself that are defensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You actually said why are people being so defensive while literally attacking people for not being sensitive to their kid’s needs. You have major issues. I guess you walk around judging half the population in your narrow view of the world, because half the adults you come in contact with are divorced.

Point proven. Why are you a narcissist?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You suck as a person which isn’t good for your kids to see either.

As I said, defensive and defective.

Nope, it’s the unhappy married people such as yourself that are defensive.

Tell me more about you being so happy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives.

You suck as a person which isn’t good for your kids to see either.

As I said, defensive and defective.

Go work on your marriage, it probably really needs it.

Doesn’t need it. I’m happpily married, but you are a narcissist.