Eye-opening new study on the harms of divorce
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
PP, but I would totally hang out with some of you. I have appreciated the many thoughtful, nuanced, grounded-in-real-life posts that have appeared in this thread. Thanks to all y’all keeping it real. |
Anonymous
Having a divorce definitely increases the risk of the children getting divorced. |
Anonymous
Correlation or causation, though? As many posters have pointed out, it's actually very hard to parse the data, because there's no way to make an apples-to-apples comparison. |
Anonymous
What are you smoking? This is one of the easiest data points to find, which you’ll find they have if you’d read any study. “Kids from X neighborhood, kids from X high school, kids whose parents made X amount, kids whose parents were X as a career.” The ability to parse the data is almost limitless and all things being equal kids with divorced parents are doomed to fail at a rate SUBSTANTIALLY more than their equal peers. This isn’t hard people! Do you divorced folk not know how to read?! |
Anonymous
It also increases the risk of an adult child being estranged from one or both parents. I heard on a podcast that now 10% of adults are estranged from at least one parent and the most common denominator (obv there are many other factors at play too) was divorce |
Anonymous
Even those people are delusional. In high income neighborhoods everyone is doing fine, but unless you’re in a wealth bracket in the tens of millions, your children’s lifestyle and opportunities have changed for the worse. Maybe they still have college funds but now they’re limited to state colleges instead of the top universities they once aspired to attend. Their married parents might have been planning on lavish weddings and providing a down payment for a house whereas now they’re all focusing on rebuilding wealth. The conclusion that children are significantly worse off after a divorce doesn’t mean everyone is living in a slum. It means you have significantly LESS than if those children’s parents had stayed married. |
Anonymous
There are plenty of good state schools that are top schools. No one is entitled to have a wedding or down payment and many of us were just fine with those things. |
Anonymous
This might be the dumbest statement I’ve heard in awhile |
Anonymous
It’s a sad statistic. |
Anonymous
|
Y’all can stay in a roommate, loveless, no sex relationship if you want to appease the kids but modeling a healthy relationship is paramount and takes priority instead of going through a charade in front of them all the time.
|
Anonymous
How do you model being a good partner? |
Anonymous
Starters by loving your spouse and they’re are lots of loveless relationships and I wouldn’t want my kid to be stuck in the mud in a relationship that no longer works and to constantly see a relationship where two people are going through the motions every day because they are worried about the ramifications on their kid. I think that’s worse than divorce. |
Anonymous
| I think many of the posters are defensive, not sure why. I would think that parents who divorce are, inherently, not mature and normal people. As in something was wrong with them anyway. These people will destroy whatever they can, including their kids' lives. |
Anonymous
Well, yeah. People tend to have less money when they maintain separate homes than when they pool their resources. This study says that’s a huge part of the effect. Not exactly “eye-opening,” and not what a lot of people in this thread are implying. I’m married btw, but I wouldn’t stay married just for the $. Would you? |
Anonymous
How would you design the study that compares couples who divorce to those who are just as unhappy, in relationships that are just as dysfunctional, but stay married? |