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Has anyone else experience this? I had a parent come in for a conference this year that lost her cool and said some terrible things. I wanted to let her have it--I don't get paid very much, I work like a dog all year (yes, all year) and put up with a terrible boss because I love my students. I pour my heart and soul in to work--she had a lot of nerve to suggest I didn't. Parent didnt want to hear that her child is in academic trouble and needs extra help.
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| Crazy long emails attacking a teacher and then following up with the DD instead of talking to the teacher directly. Once a week minimum. Received a nice email at the end of the year, but she didn't bother to CC the DD or HOS. If you are unhappy you tell admin but if you are happy you dont? Thanks. |
| I've only experienced this maybe once or twice in fourteen years of teaching. But both at the same school and both handled badly by my superior. |
| No, our director would never stand for it. |
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My DC had a teacher who once told me that every year there was a parent-teacher conference she just had to end because the parents were out of control. The administration always backed her up. She never lost her cool, she just said "I don't think we're not being productive right now, so we'll have to stop here," or something like that. Don't try to defend yourself against irrational people.
You might have a conversation with your school head or division head in the abstract, not in response to a particular situation. Something like, "if this happens, how would you like me to handle it?" Then you should be able to count on that support if you do what she says. |
| How terrible. I know a teacher at DD's swanky private school who was basically abused by big contributors at the school. Donating a ton of money doesnt earn the right to yell at your kid's teacher. |
Been there. Yes, I'm talking to YOU black range rover! |
Ha! And you too Mercedes SUV and Honda Pilot! |
| Teacher here at a private school. Our parents are respectful of our teachers. I've had three out of control parents (two big donors and one not). I talked to one parent about her behavior and she never apologized or even acknowledged that she made my life hell for a year. One my Division Director spoke to and told her she couldn't behave that way with a teacher which was really supportive. The third apologized and calmed down. She turned out to be one of my favorite parents! |
| Yes, I have had this happen, but thankfully it is not the norm. It is hurtful. But when a parent loses control and gets in a blaming mode like that, it really isn't about you. You're just a convenient scapegoat. It's not fair, but (easier said than done) you shouldn't take it personally. |
| Oh boo-hoo! Everyone who works in any profession faces this. Why should teachers be any different?! Just have to put your big girl/boy pants on and deal. |
ITA. Sorry, teachers, but it comes with the territory. Of course it's not right, but most of us face unpleasant people all the time in our jobs. You should meet some of my clients... |
| Sure but I would not want someone who despised me and to whom I was borderline cruel taking care of, spending hours with and EVALUATING my child. |
This may be true but it is still unreasonable. And there is no reason for it to come with the territory. Its unacceptable wherever it occurs. |
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The pp suggests that it is unwise to communicate with your children's teachers because they may come to despise the parents which could lead to retailliation against the child in the form of poor treatment or dishonest "EVALUATIONS".
Any adult who would retaliate against a child is malicious and potentially dangerous. They would also be sacrificing their honor and professionalism. Teachers may do it and they get away with it for a while, but eventually those behaviors will be identified by other people as well. Once a person sacrifices their honor they become the exact same thing as they claim to despise the most. |