Weird marriage - guy 21, girl 15

[Anonymous]

I knew a woman married at 17 to a 31 year old...then her husband convinced her god wanted her to shun her family because they questioned his religious authority. It's been 35 years since they've seen their daughter. I'm betting they regret giving permission for her to marry him now. they've never met their 3 grandchildren.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here again. She wasn't pregnant and they are both Hispanic from a blue collar family. this is what both of them wanted but I am surprised that girls' mom and step-dad allowed that.

I live in an area that’s about 75% Hispanic, most of my friends and my xH are Hispanic.

This isn’t uncommon. I know multiple women who dated older men as teenagers and ended up married to them very young. My best friend started dating her husband when she was 15 and he was in his 20s. My nanny was married by 18.

Many parents don’t really care, it’s just culturally accepted that girls get pregnant/married very young.

As PPs pointed out, it may not be a legal marriage. Hopefully not. Or perhaps she was pregnant but miscarried.

Personally I think it’s gross. I remember being 21 and the thought of dating a 15 year old would have been so gross to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I saw something really strange recently in PA. The guy is almost 21 and girl just turned 15 and they got married. Is it even allowed? I thought in some states it is ok after parental consent but that is very young for a girl to be getting married. It doesn't matter but can tell you the demographics if it helps with the cultural background.

"weird?" I'd be more likely to say "gross" "illegal" "sick" "pedophilic" "wrong" "Disgusting" ... and so forth.

[Anonymous]

This is messed up though. I wonder how this is even allowed in today's society. why are older men above 20-25 are not in jail for dating minors?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here again. She wasn't pregnant and they are both Hispanic from a blue collar family. this is what both of them wanted but I am surprised that girls' mom and step-dad allowed that.

I live in an area that’s about 75% Hispanic, most of my friends and my xH are Hispanic.

This isn’t uncommon. I know multiple women who dated older men as teenagers and ended up married to them very young. My best friend started dating her husband when she was 15 and he was in his 20s. My nanny was married by 18.

Many parents don’t really care, it’s just culturally accepted that girls get pregnant/married very young.

As PPs pointed out, it may not be a legal marriage. Hopefully not. Or perhaps she was pregnant but miscarried.

Personally I think it’s gross. I remember being 21 and the thought of dating a 15 year old would have been so gross to me.

Definitely very prevalent in hispanic and S American culture and not Ok to be pushing minor girls towards marrying older men. I guess the parents and mom thinks that it is ok and their daughter would be settled but it also brings a generational shift in how their family is being raised and what they could achieve in this world. Your own growth and progress is done if you marry at that age and you would always be dependent on your man. Yikes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They got married in the Catholic church?

I think you are mistaken on her age

What makes you think they got married in a Catholic Church? Are you just stereotyping?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They got married in the Catholic church?

I think you are mistaken on her age

What makes you think they got married in a Catholic Church? Are you just stereotyping?

No, ding dong, OP said they did. Stupid much?

[Anonymous]

What is wrong with you??


Call the police and CPS immediately. That child is in danger.

[Anonymous]

It’s a troll.
It is illegal to marry under age of 18 in PA regardless of parent consent. This didn’t happen and certainly didn’t in a Catholic Church in PA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No church, mosque, synagogue or temple would participate in an illegal marriage.

+1

[Anonymous]

It is not uncommon for this to happen in blue collar hispanic community. It is wrong to do it regardless but some states have very relax laws for parental consent marriages.

[Anonymous]

Can’t speak to the legality of it but I am from Eastern Europe and remember a lot of marriages in the 1990s where a 6 year difference is nothing. It wasn’t legal to marry before 18 but I knew couples who started dating when she was 14-16 and then got married when she was 18 and he would be like 25 or so by then. It was seen as a good thing, the girl is mature and successful blah blah.
FWIW the country had like 99% literacy rate so not exactly a shitehole.
I am not surprised if it’s acceptable in Hispanic culture as well. Just more traditional societies.
It’s probably not a great setup but also doesn’t make my blood boil you know? Some people aren’t going to develop much educationally anyway. Maybe it’s something that suits them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can’t speak to the legality of it but I am from Eastern Europe and remember a lot of marriages in the 1990s where a 6 year difference is nothing. It wasn’t legal to marry before 18 but I knew couples who started dating when she was 14-16 and then got married when she was 18 and he would be like 25 or so by then. It was seen as a good thing, the girl is mature and successful blah blah.
FWIW the country had like 99% literacy rate so not exactly a shitehole.
I am not surprised if it’s acceptable in Hispanic culture as well. Just more traditional societies.
It’s probably not a great setup but also doesn’t make my blood boil you know? Some people aren’t going to develop much educationally anyway. Maybe it’s something that suits them.

I know that historically marrying girls off in their early teens was often done. But it doesn't mean it's right. It was convenient for patriarchies to have girls stay submissive and beholden to men, whether their father or their husband. So if society makes it look cool, what it means is that they're encouraging women to stay in that cycle.

I met my older husband at 19 and married him at 23, so I'm not against marrying young! But at least I knew what I was doing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can't legally marry under 18 in PA so someone is lying or wrong about the age. Either way, call the police and CPS

I checked and marriage at younger age is allowed with parental consent but 15 is too young. I think you can get married at 16 with parental consent.

Pennsylvania marriage age requirement laws previously allowed minors as young as 16 to get married with parental consent. However, in 2020, they changed the law to make the minimum age 18 with no exceptions.

[Anonymous]

It probably has a better chance than most marriages. Especially if the families are supportive. I married a 16 year old woman. We aren't together now but it all worked out fine.