Fwb said 18-30 yr olds are most sexually attractive

[Anonymous]

Dump him. He isn't worth it. Not if you are questioning it. Listen to your gut.

[Anonymous]

You've made it clear that the nature of your relationship is FWB, so obviously he's not serious about you. He's not your emotional support buddy or your boyfriend, he's there out of convenience. The real question is, were you hoping for something more from this relationship?

[Anonymous]

I would stop seeing him. I wouldn't want to see anyone who makes me feel bad for any reason. You don't need him, so why keep him around?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am turning 31 in a couple weeks. I am a single parent and not dating seriously. I have had a 43 yr old male companion for the past 3 years who I have a good friendship with. We go on dates and hook up, sometimes going a few months without seeing one another and other times hanging out fairly consistently. I hang out with him when my ex has the kids (roughly 50% of the time). I am bisexual.

Yesterday I mentioned that a couple guys I worked with were hot. They aren't people that I work with regularly. I asked him if he had any hot coworkers. He said only the students at his work (a university) were hot. I then asked him what age he finds most sexually attractive, and he said 18-30.

I work with 18-year-olds (high school students) and told him that I can't see them that way. I know their bodies are similar to 20 somethings, but the fact that their brains are 18 year olds I find them to be baby-like. I said that personally I find women in their 30s or even 40s to be most attractive. I said "don't you think so?" And he said "yeah, if you're into milfs" and laughed.

Should I stop seeing him? I let him know that his comments made me feel insecure. I know that men like younger women etc etc, but I guess I prefer to have sex with a man who is at least also into women in the same age decade as I am. Of course he's just a fwb so it shouldn't matter to me so much, but it hurt.

So he honestly answered your question and now you are too insecure (and stupid) to accept his honest answer? Sounds like you have the 18 (or less) year old brain.

Ignoring your awful tone, I have accepted his answer. I just wonder if I would be better off hooking up with a man who is more into women my age as I am getting older. If I'm going to be with a man 12 yrs my senior, I want him to appreciate the fact that I'm much younger.

Regardless, you're going to be going downhill for whoever you're having "benefits" with. The nature of those relationships allows people to trade in for newer models once they get a little rusty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought this was fairly common? There's always a "teen" (I presume 18) genre link front and center at porn sites.

I'm aware, just wish he didn't put the cutoff at 30 knowing damn well I turn 31 soon.

He was trying to neg you so you will feel insecure and continue hanging out with him. Don't fall for it.

[Anonymous]

Who asked is it ok to ghost someone…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought this was fairly common? There's always a "teen" (I presume 18) genre link front and center at porn sites.

I'm aware, just wish he didn't put the cutoff at 30 knowing damn well I turn 31 soon.

He was trying to neg you so you will feel insecure and continue hanging out with him. Don't fall for it.

Op here, this makes the most sense to me. Honestly I am kind of out of his league and I feel he knows it. as far as he has told me, I am the only girl he's slept with since we first hung out. Meanwhile I have tons of options, have had a threesome and other fun. I am honest about it, so there's no reason for him not to tell me if he is hooking up with others.

He tells me about past adventures including paying for sex. I kind of wonder if most of his sexual experiences are paid for, as he is kind of clueless in bed. I don't even really like him for the sex, I like our conversation and the fun dates he plans.

[Anonymous]

A 43 year old man who knows you're about to turn 31 tells you he finds women younger than you most attractive and you think you should keep sleeping with this insulting loser?

[Anonymous]

They watch porn. How is this a surprise to you, OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought this was fairly common? There's always a "teen" (I presume 18) genre link front and center at porn sites.

I'm aware, just wish he didn't put the cutoff at 30 knowing damn well I turn 31 soon.

He was trying to neg you so you will feel insecure and continue hanging out with him. Don't fall for it.

Op here, this makes the most sense to me. Honestly I am kind of out of his league and I feel he knows it. as far as he has told me, I am the only girl he's slept with since we first hung out. Meanwhile I have tons of options, have had a threesome and other fun. I am honest about it, so there's no reason for him not to tell me if he is hooking up with others.

He tells me about past adventures including paying for sex. I kind of wonder if most of his sexual experiences are paid for, as he is kind of clueless in bed. I don't even really like him for the sex, I like our conversation and the fun dates he plans.

What exactly are you doing with this jackass? Your low self-esteem is jumping off the page and I promise he can see it too. That's why he's testing you with obvious insults to see what he can get away with. You have work to do on your self-worth and you're never going to get that promised land of emotional security with this predator putting you down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They watch porn. How is this a surprise to you, OP?

Men peak in college and their attractiveness falls off precipitously after that.

They bald, they get pregnant bellies without gestating anything except excess food, they wrinkle and crease, their penises lose hardness, and their personalities become bitter and nasty as their testosterone plummets. Sometimes I look at DH's college photos and I can hardly believe he was ever so attractive.

Anyone with eyes knows a college hunk craps on a 30+ man looks-wise. No need to watch porn.

HOWEVER, only an a--hole would say this to an older man.

It's about judgment, which you clearly lack, since you don't seem to get the importance of judgment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought this was fairly common? There's always a "teen" (I presume 18) genre link front and center at porn sites.

I'm aware, just wish he didn't put the cutoff at 30 knowing damn well I turn 31 soon.

He was trying to neg you so you will feel insecure and continue hanging out with him. Don't fall for it.

Op here, this makes the most sense to me. Honestly I am kind of out of his league and I feel he knows it. as far as he has told me, I am the only girl he's slept with since we first hung out. Meanwhile I have tons of options, have had a threesome and other fun. I am honest about it, so there's no reason for him not to tell me if he is hooking up with others.

He tells me about past adventures including paying for sex. I kind of wonder if most of his sexual experiences are paid for, as he is kind of clueless in bed. I don't even really like him for the sex, I like our conversation and the fun dates he plans.

Well you sound as pathetic as him

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought this was fairly common? There's always a "teen" (I presume 18) genre link front and center at porn sites.

I'm aware, just wish he didn't put the cutoff at 30 knowing damn well I turn 31 soon.

He was trying to neg you so you will feel insecure and continue hanging out with him. Don't fall for it.

Op here, this makes the most sense to me. Honestly I am kind of out of his league and I feel he knows it. as far as he has told me, I am the only girl he's slept with since we first hung out. Meanwhile I have tons of options, have had a threesome and other fun. I am honest about it, so there's no reason for him not to tell me if he is hooking up with others.

He tells me about past adventures including paying for sex. I kind of wonder if most of his sexual experiences are paid for, as he is kind of clueless in bed. I don't even really like him for the sex, I like our conversation and the fun dates he plans.

Honestly this whole thing sounds quite toxic. You’re telling him about your adventures, threesomes, hot coworkers. Then you asked him a question you knew you wouldn’t like the answer too.

It sounds like you’re in some weird competition to prove who cares the least what the other is doing and who is out having the most fun. It reeks of insecurity.

He has probably slept with other women besides you but was trying to be polite. Then you started talking about how hot your coworkers are, which is hurtful to the person you’re sleeping with, FWB or not. So he one upped you.

Also, never ask men questions you don’t want to know the answer to. I don’t ask the men I’m dating if they think so-and-so is hot or has a great booty or whatever, because I don’t want to know the answer and I’m not gonna play the stupid game where we have to lie to make other people feel good about themselves.

BTW he could just as easily have posted “my FWB told me about a threesome to hurt my feelings because she thinks I’m not as good in bed as those people” or whatever. Stop it and grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He should be grateful you're even spending time with him. Move on.

Agree

[Anonymous]

You are an easy and convenient booty call for him.

He will find a hot 18-30 yr old for a serious relationship one day or continue banging them and you as he pleases.