“Too bad you only have boys”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A friend recently said “too bad you only have boys. You should have had more kids so you could have a girl.”

Who says that???

Tell her you'd love more kids but you run the risk of having girls so decided against it. She's ignorant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Having two of the same sex is the dream. More likely to be friends, can share a room, get to hand down all the clothes (yes, I get you can do that with opposite sex sibs and it depends on personality, but it’s more likely with same sex). The whole “one of each” thing is dumb and outdated.

I wanted one of each, but my husband wanted two of the same for this reason. He didn’t care if it was two girls or two boys (we got two girls). He grew up with a close age brother, and 2 sisters close in age with each other.

[Anonymous]

She sounds like she completely has zero social skills. Who says that??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A friend recently said “too bad you only have boys. You should have had more kids so you could have a girl.”

Who says that???

Had a medical doctor have the nerve to say that to me when I said I was going to adopt a newborn boy. Spoke as if I was doing something nobel for adopting a male. I was startled and didn’t return.

[Anonymous]

I said “hi”.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What did you say to her that she made that comment?

+199. Not gonna lie this was my first thought.

[Anonymous]

My friends with only girls have said appalling things to me, too. They make generalizations about how men are terrible and how happy they are that they had girls. It’s hard not to take personally, especially when they talked about being smug that none of their kids can be drafted. I get that some of them choose to have girls, due to IVF, but part of having kids the old-fashioned way is welcoming whoever shows up. I had boys, so I love my boys and try to raise them to be equal partners. I don’t need them hearing how awful men are.

[Anonymous]

I would like to think your friend has daughters she loves and appreciates. She simply wants you to have that joy, too. Some sons can be more delightful than some daughters, it’s all personality!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friends with only girls have said appalling things to me, too. They make generalizations about how men are terrible and how happy they are that they had girls. It’s hard not to take personally, especially when they talked about being smug that none of their kids can be drafted. I get that some of them choose to have girls, due to IVF, but part of having kids the old-fashioned way is welcoming whoever shows up. I had boys, so I love my boys and try to raise them to be equal partners. I don’t need them hearing how awful men are.

Your friends seem mean! I am a mother of all girls too and I would never say that to anyone with only boys. Every child is a blessing. You should tell your friends men usually turn out awful because of how they are raised by their mothers so they should put in the hard work and make sure their sons turn out right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friends with only girls have said appalling things to me, too. They make generalizations about how men are terrible and how happy they are that they had girls. It’s hard not to take personally, especially when they talked about being smug that none of their kids can be drafted. I get that some of them choose to have girls, due to IVF, but part of having kids the old-fashioned way is welcoming whoever shows up. I had boys, so I love my boys and try to raise them to be equal partners. I don’t need them hearing how awful men are.

I see daily comments on DCUM that blame men for everything wrong in the world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People have their own opinions about everything. I’ve had people tell me how sorry that only have a single girl. She must be so lonely, and who ever will carry on the family name?

I don’t usually go out of my way to indulge them.

Are we in the 1950s?

My sister and I kept our original names. ("Blah blah blah it's your father's 's name") Her children have hyphenated names. My kids have my last name.

My brother is gay and won't be having children.

The patriarchy has got to stop somewhere. In our family it has now stopped.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friends with only girls have said appalling things to me, too. They make generalizations about how men are terrible and how happy they are that they had girls. It’s hard not to take personally, especially when they talked about being smug that none of their kids can be drafted. I get that some of them choose to have girls, due to IVF, but part of having kids the old-fashioned way is welcoming whoever shows up. I had boys, so I love my boys and try to raise them to be equal partners. I don’t need them hearing how awful men are.

Your friends seem mean! I am a mother of all girls too and I would never say that to anyone with only boys. Every child is a blessing. You should tell your friends men usually turn out awful because of how they are raised by their mothers so they should put in the hard work and make sure their sons turn out right.

This is unfortunately true. Internalized misogyny is responsible for the perpetuation of the patriarchy. My own mother was incredibly sexist and the person it hurt the most was, ironically, my brother. She turned him into a monster with her coddling.

[Anonymous]

I kind of feel this way … about myself. I have all boys.

BUT I would never ever in a million years say that to a friend who has only boys. Time to drop this insensitive friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friends with only girls have said appalling things to me, too. They make generalizations about how men are terrible and how happy they are that they had girls. It’s hard not to take personally, especially when they talked about being smug that none of their kids can be drafted. I get that some of them choose to have girls, due to IVF, but part of having kids the old-fashioned way is welcoming whoever shows up. I had boys, so I love my boys and try to raise them to be equal partners. I don’t need them hearing how awful men are.

Why are you still friends with these people?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friends with only girls have said appalling things to me, too. They make generalizations about how men are terrible and how happy they are that they had girls. It’s hard not to take personally, especially when they talked about being smug that none of their kids can be drafted. I get that some of them choose to have girls, due to IVF, but part of having kids the old-fashioned way is welcoming whoever shows up. I had boys, so I love my boys and try to raise them to be equal partners. I don’t need them hearing how awful men are.

Any anyway this chain shows plenty of girls grow up into women who totally suck. It's not unique to one gender.

[Anonymous]

I only have boys and get these comments but I wanted boys so... I wonder how often girl moms get these comments. Ironically most families I know with 3+ kids had 2 girls first and made it pretty clear they were going on to try for a boy. Very few B-B-G families.