It's been 10 years since our oldest graduated from high school. The most successful are

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The most successful young adults who are now 27 or 28 years old were the top students in their high school class, no matter where they went to undergrad. From Ivies to tiny liberal arts college to fairly regional public universities, they all zoomed through undergrad, sometimes in three years, many went to grad or professional school, and they all have great careers. It seems all of them are married.

The handful of middle of the pack students and student-athletes who surprised everyone when they got into elite T20s regressed to their mean and have totally normal careers, at best.

It seems smart ambitious highly-motivated teens become smart ambitious highly-motivated adults. And if your teen is not those things, Tiger Mom'ing them into an elite college probably isn't going to change anything about their life and professional trajectory.

All of them are married at 27? Do you live in the deep south or Pakistan?

lol
So true. The OP is a backwards provincial mom stuck on this board with grown and flown children….
Hmmm. What does that tell you.

The upper classes all over the US actually do marry in their mid to late 20s, statistically. It the middle and UMC that marry in their early to mid 30s. The LC marry young and multiple times.

Ummm. Try again. And this tells us you are an immigrant.

Whats with the casual xenophobia?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm Yale '02 and Wharton '07. None of my peers were married before 30.

You either don’t have friends or you’re lying about attending either of these colleges. Probably both.

I believe them.

-NP with a similar profile and I can think of only two of my classmates who got married before age 30 and both of those married at age 28.

But it doesn't matter what I or any of these posters share about their personal experiences or anecdotes about people they know of. The statistics prove that majority of people in the US are getting married in their 30s not 20s and that this is especially true of higher income people with more advanced degrees, which is the group that statistically marries the latest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm Yale '02 and Wharton '07. None of my peers were married before 30.

You either don’t have friends or you’re lying about attending either of these colleges. Probably both.

I believe them.

-NP with a similar profile and I can think of only two of my classmates who got married before age 30 and both of those married at age 28.

But it doesn't matter what I or any of these posters share about their personal experiences or anecdotes about people they know of. The statistics prove that majority of people in the US are getting married in their 30s not 20s and that this is especially true of higher income people with more advanced degrees, which is the group that statistically marries the latest.

The US Census Bureau found that the median age for marriage in 2022 was 28.6 years old for women and 30.5 years old for men. You can do the math. I'm the same year from another Ivy as you and people were starting to get married in their late 20s. Many did marry in their 30s.

[Anonymous]

Median age of first marriage goes up the more formal education you have. For both men and women who go beyond undergrad, the median is in their 30s.

https://www.bgsu.edu/ncfmr/resources/data/family-profiles/julian-median-age-first-marriage-2021-fp-22-15.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm Yale '02 and Wharton '07. None of my peers were married before 30.

You either don’t have friends or you’re lying about attending either of these colleges. Probably both.

Ivy League 06. There were two waves of marriage. The ones that married immediately out of school and then after grad school. Then a bunch of single people. The ones that married immediately out of school are still together and their kids are grown and I am jealous.

[Anonymous]

No one's disputing whether there were multiple waves. The question is which wave is statistically more common than the others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm Yale '02 and Wharton '07. None of my peers were married before 30.

You either don’t have friends or you’re lying about attending either of these colleges. Probably both.

Ivy League 06. There were two waves of marriage. The ones that married immediately out of school and then after grad school. Then a bunch of single people. The ones that married immediately out of school are still together and their kids are grown and I am jealous.

It is very possible for someone to go through Yale and not have a single friend who didn't marry until their 30s. Such cliques typically migrated to NYC or SF etc right after graduation and took a different path into adulthood, so she likely doesn't realize plenty of her classmates did in fact get married in their 20s. Whole cohorts got married within a year or two of grad/professional schools, which typically takes you into the late 20s. Then we have plenty of grads from South Asian / East Asian backgrounds who also almost always got married in their 20s.

There is a distinct economic advantage to marrying in your 20s. Double the HHI, more likely to buy houses earlier, build up retirement savings faster.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm Yale '02 and Wharton '07. None of my peers were married before 30.

You either don’t have friends or you’re lying about attending either of these colleges. Probably both.

Ivy League 06. There were two waves of marriage. The ones that married immediately out of school and then after grad school. Then a bunch of single people. The ones that married immediately out of school are still together and their kids are grown and I am jealous.

It is very possible for someone to go through Yale and not have a single friend who didn't marry until their 30s. Such cliques typically migrated to NYC or SF etc right after graduation and took a different path into adulthood, so she likely doesn't realize plenty of her classmates did in fact get married in their 20s. Whole cohorts got married within a year or two of grad/professional schools, which typically takes you into the late 20s. Then we have plenty of grads from South Asian / East Asian backgrounds who also almost always got married in their 20s.

There is a distinct economic advantage to marrying in your 20s. Double the HHI, more likely to buy houses earlier, build up retirement savings faster.

There are also always a few grad students who are already married.

DH is a physician and there were several students who were married in med school or residency. It is a bold statement to say no one was married before 30.

I got married right before 30. I met Dh in grad school and we got engaged when he was a resident.

[Anonymous]

lolol! I didn’t finish college, was a horrible high school student and my w2 last year was 417k. about 100k more than my DH who went to UVA. Additionally I got our kid an internship at my company after his freshman year and I believe that helped him get a great internship this summer at EY. He graduated at 30% of his high school class.

successful adults often come from successful
families.

[Anonymous]

People claiming to have gone to Ivies but then arguing with anecdotes over statistics. Got it.

(Slowly and quietly moves state schools up DC’s list)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm Yale '02 and Wharton '07. None of my peers were married before 30.

You either don’t have friends or you’re lying about attending either of these colleges. Probably both.

I believe them.

-NP with a similar profile and I can think of only two of my classmates who got married before age 30 and both of those married at age 28.

But it doesn't matter what I or any of these posters share about their personal experiences or anecdotes about people they know of. The statistics prove that majority of people in the US are getting married in their 30s not 20s and that this is especially true of higher income people with more advanced degrees, which is the group that statistically marries the latest.

Correct.

You and I are arguing wth the 'help'.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm Yale '02 and Wharton '07. None of my peers were married before 30.

You either don’t have friends or you’re lying about attending either of these colleges. Probably both.

I believe them.

-NP with a similar profile and I can think of only two of my classmates who got married before age 30 and both of those married at age 28.

But it doesn't matter what I or any of these posters share about their personal experiences or anecdotes about people they know of. The statistics prove that majority of people in the US are getting married in their 30s not 20s and that this is especially true of higher income people with more advanced degrees, which is the group that statistically marries the latest.

Correct.

You and I are arguing wth the 'help'.

Cool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Correct. Ambitious kids become ambitious adults.

+1
You’ll never convince me that top schools matter.

+1. To some, it's bragging rights for a brief moment, but the cream rises to the top. When your kids reach their 20s nobody cares where they went to college, they care about what they're doing with their life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like a lot of people measure success by how much money you make, what neighborhood you live in, or how nice your house is. There are plenty of people who do good valuable work and don't make much money. They can be happy, content, don't overconsume, advocate for a better world, have time to engage in their communities, and donate to worthy causes. They can be great successes. A quality education can be a big part of this.

Cool. In the real world, the public understanding of the meaning of success is heavily correlated with financial outcomes.

DP
This says a lot about you. Actually, MOST PEOPLE in the real world are religious and their ideologies consist of a lot more than money. It is a minority of people like you that make money and consumerism your religion. Good for you, but just know that the majority of the world's population is not with you. There are a lot of people, especially here, who are though. I hope your consumption makes you happy in the end.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People claiming to have gone to Ivies but then arguing with anecdotes over statistics. Got it.

(Slowly and quietly moves state schools up DC’s list)