Kangaroos are terrifying and no one is talking about it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a biologist, I could tell you stories...

...particularly about dolphins and otters. Kangoroos are aggressive as well.

Lots of species we find adorable aren't all that in real life.

What did otters do?!

Not the biologist but we have a resident sea otter that is aggressively stealing surfboards from surfers. Sea otters are not as aggressive as river otters but it’s still really lucky no one has been bitten yet. Surfers don’t like giving up their expensive boards and this otter really wants them. I wouldn’t want to get bit especially in this area as it’s a great white shark nursery.

What are the otters doing with all the surfboards??

I assumed they're setting up a business. You're probably one of those people who applauds free enterprise when humans do it but won't let animals in on the deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a biologist, I could tell you stories...

...particularly about dolphins and otters. Kangoroos are aggressive as well.

Lots of species we find adorable aren't all that in real life.

What did otters do?!

Not the biologist but we have a resident sea otter that is aggressively stealing surfboards from surfers. Sea otters are not as aggressive as river otters but it’s still really lucky no one has been bitten yet. Surfers don’t like giving up their expensive boards and this otter really wants them. I wouldn’t want to get bit especially in this area as it’s a great white shark nursery.

What are the otters doing with all the surfboards??

I assumed they're setting up a business. You're probably one of those people who applauds free enterprise when humans do it but won't let animals in on the deal.

Actually I was hoping they were sharing with the beavers and creating a new colony of otters and beavers. Eventually due to the raging success, DOGE would be sent in to investigate and the otters would... use your imagination.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is funny. I was a zookeeper and worked at a small zoo where we hand reared a baby kangaroo. Big mistake. He was attached to hunans, and whenever he saw a woman he’d get massively aroused. When women keepers went in with him, he’d try to hump them and get mad when he couldn’t.

That same zoo had a porcupine that was male and hated everybody except a male keeper, who would let him hump a shovel to completion whenever he went in to clean because otherwise the porcupine would try to hump him the entire time.

Apes will decapitate baby birds that fall in the exhibit and use them as a fl*shlight.

Otters…I forget where this was, but I heard about an otter at an aquarium who would suck himself all day.

Well...I'm pretty sure most men would if they could. Q: Why do dogs lick their balls? A: Because they can.

[Anonymous]

Somebody link the NextDoor post about the dead kangaroo on Georgia Ave

[Anonymous]

Red roos are bigger and more lethal than gray roos.

[Anonymous]

Very few people ever have run-ins with kangaroos outside of Australia and New Guinea so it isn't particularly relevant. I would think that animal keepers working in zoos are aware of kangaroo dangers.

I hope you never have a genuine problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Very few people ever have run-ins with kangaroos outside of Australia and New Guinea so it isn't particularly relevant. I would think that animal keepers working in zoos are aware of kangaroo dangers.

I hope you never have a genuine problem.

I hope you one day get a sense of humor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Very few people ever have run-ins with kangaroos outside of Australia and New Guinea so it isn't particularly relevant. I would think that animal keepers working in zoos are aware of kangaroo dangers.

I hope you never have a genuine problem.

You’re obviously part of the conspiracy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a biologist, I could tell you stories...

...particularly about dolphins and otters. Kangoroos are aggressive as well.

Lots of species we find adorable aren't all that in real life.

What did otters do?!

Not the biologist but we have a resident sea otter that is aggressively stealing surfboards from surfers. Sea otters are not as aggressive as river otters but it’s still really lucky no one has been bitten yet. Surfers don’t like giving up their expensive boards and this otter really wants them. I wouldn’t want to get bit especially in this area as it’s a great white shark nursery.

What are the otters doing with all the surfboards??

I assumed they're setting up a business. You're probably one of those people who applauds free enterprise when humans do it but won't let animals in on the deal.

+1 You people will never let an otter make a buck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a biologist, I could tell you stories...

...particularly about dolphins and otters. Kangoroos are aggressive as well.

Lots of species we find adorable aren't all that in real life.

What did otters do?!

Not the biologist but we have a resident sea otter that is aggressively stealing surfboards from surfers. Sea otters are not as aggressive as river otters but it’s still really lucky no one has been bitten yet. Surfers don’t like giving up their expensive boards and this otter really wants them. I wouldn’t want to get bit especially in this area as it’s a great white shark nursery.

What are the otters doing with all the surfboards??

I assumed they're setting up a business. You're probably one of those people who applauds free enterprise when humans do it but won't let animals in on the deal.

Oh, how I needed this thread today. LMAO

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a biologist, I could tell you stories...

...particularly about dolphins and otters. Kangoroos are aggressive as well.

Lots of species we find adorable aren't all that in real life.

What did otters do?!

Not the biologist but we have a resident sea otter that is aggressively stealing surfboards from surfers. Sea otters are not as aggressive as river otters but it’s still really lucky no one has been bitten yet. Surfers don’t like giving up their expensive boards and this otter really wants them. I wouldn’t want to get bit especially in this area as it’s a great white shark nursery.

What are the otters doing with all the surfboards??

I assumed they're setting up a business. You're probably one of those people who applauds free enterprise when humans do it but won't let animals in on the deal.

+1 You people will never let an otter make a buck.

Otters prefer clams.

[Anonymous]

Apparently there’s an island in Scotland that has a colony of wild wallabies. I lurk the Scotland subreddit and came across this factoid being discussed by the locals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Very few people ever have run-ins with kangaroos outside of Australia and New Guinea so it isn't particularly relevant. I would think that animal keepers working in zoos are aware of kangaroo dangers.

I hope you never have a genuine problem.

You’re obviously part of the conspiracy.

She’s a kangaroo apologist.

[Anonymous]

I predict this will be one of those threads that never go away, like the "is Kelly Ripa too skinny" thread but for kangaroos. Perpetuity...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I predict this will be one of those threads that never go away, like the "is Kelly Ripa too skinny" thread but for kangaroos. Perpetuity...

Every time that insufferable will never disappear, Jen Hatmaker thread comes up, I will come bump this.