Is anyone else super triggered by ppl showing off on social media?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it kind of sounds like you're annoyed that others are getting attention for things you do too. Jealousy isn't the right word, maybe validation? Kind of like how when someone has an achievement and gets attention and praise for it so someone butts in with their achievement so they can get praise too. But since you don't post you don't get the attention and that's really what bothers you

This is so untrue. I fly private, and stay in hotel penthouses, and this triggers me when I see it. Showing off is showing off, and it’s awful behavior. If there was no social media, you would not be posting anything and living in the moment and enjoying your memory.

You’re making the assumption that someone is posting to brag when in reality they might not be. You are assigning malicious intent. This is all based on your own morals, values and rigid social media code that you have developed.

And yet you are going out of your way to tell us that you fly private and stay in penthouses.

I think you definitely believe folks shouldn’t be posting certain things on social media and it’s likely because you don’t want them to be on your level. You subconsciously want to be better than others, and it’s obvious you find ways to judge people in order to do that.

Lastly: if you are in therapy, you have issues. Good for you for addressing them in therapy. But some things really shouldn’t require therapy. Sometimes you just need to realize that being easily triggered by silly things is your issue instead of digging in to find support in judging others and making yourself feel better.

Comparable to implicit bias: if you feel bad thoughts creeping up, remind yourself it’s not cool and try to shift your mindset. Don’t feed into it.

In short: try not to be a miserable jerk. Be better.

Op - this post wasn’t me. But thanks!

But I’ve read your other posts, and my advice applies to you. Seriously.

Honestly from your post I think you are kind of a judgemental and miserable jerk.
I at least have the decency to question my judgement and get therapy. You don’t

How old are you? Seriously.

Being triggered by social media indicates *you* have an issue. Ditto for being in therapy. Happy, resilient people aren’t triggered by social media or need therapy.

Again, I applaud your effort to seek help, but at some point you might want to evaluate if therapy is helping. Sometimes it’s actually better to handle yourself rather than seek an audience and validation through a paid therapist. I know several people who wasted years/decades with a therapist when what they really needed to do was stop being so self-centered and fixated on their own thoughts and feelings.

The only reason I’m engaging with you is because you posted here. I don’t judge people irl. If I catch myself going there, I recognize it internally and pivot. Again: it’s a skill people should develop.

Oh dear. Your ignorance is showing.

How's your therapy bill? Maybe that's why you can't afford business class.

There’s something terribly wrong with you that you use “therapy” as a slur. You’re ugly.

And no, I’m not in therapy (was once for three months after a family death many years ago) and of course I can fly business class. I’m just not insecure enough to share it for Likes on the internet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it kind of sounds like you're annoyed that others are getting attention for things you do too. Jealousy isn't the right word, maybe validation? Kind of like how when someone has an achievement and gets attention and praise for it so someone butts in with their achievement so they can get praise too. But since you don't post you don't get the attention and that's really what bothers you

This is so untrue. I fly private, and stay in hotel penthouses, and this triggers me when I see it. Showing off is showing off, and it’s awful behavior. If there was no social media, you would not be posting anything and living in the moment and enjoying your memory.

You’re making the assumption that someone is posting to brag when in reality they might not be. You are assigning malicious intent. This is all based on your own morals, values and rigid social media code that you have developed.

And yet you are going out of your way to tell us that you fly private and stay in penthouses.

I think you definitely believe folks shouldn’t be posting certain things on social media and it’s likely because you don’t want them to be on your level. You subconsciously want to be better than others, and it’s obvious you find ways to judge people in order to do that.

Lastly: if you are in therapy, you have issues. Good for you for addressing them in therapy. But some things really shouldn’t require therapy. Sometimes you just need to realize that being easily triggered by silly things is your issue instead of digging in to find support in judging others and making yourself feel better.

Comparable to implicit bias: if you feel bad thoughts creeping up, remind yourself it’s not cool and try to shift your mindset. Don’t feed into it.

In short: try not to be a miserable jerk. Be better.

Op - this post wasn’t me. But thanks!

But I’ve read your other posts, and my advice applies to you. Seriously.

Honestly from your post I think you are kind of a judgemental and miserable jerk.
I at least have the decency to question my judgement and get therapy. You don’t

How old are you? Seriously.

Being triggered by social media indicates *you* have an issue. Ditto for being in therapy. Happy, resilient people aren’t triggered by social media or need therapy.

Again, I applaud your effort to seek help, but at some point you might want to evaluate if therapy is helping. Sometimes it’s actually better to handle yourself rather than seek an audience and validation through a paid therapist. I know several people who wasted years/decades with a therapist when what they really needed to do was stop being so self-centered and fixated on their own thoughts and feelings.

The only reason I’m engaging with you is because you posted here. I don’t judge people irl. If I catch myself going there, I recognize it internally and pivot. Again: it’s a skill people should develop.

Oh dear. Your ignorance is showing.

How's your therapy bill? Maybe that's why you can't afford business class.

No one on here said they can’t afford business class.
Many here said they can but would never post about traveling business class. Literally as tacky as posting a photo of you making it rain with actual cash. I’m serious. It’s that obvious

Ok, they don't see it is tacky, and it drives you nuts. Too bad.

DP here. Tacky people never see their tacky behavior as tacky. Either that or they know its tacky and don't have a problem with being tacky. That doesn't change the fact that it is.

You’l be OK, boo.

Oh, I see. You’re 12. That explains a lot.

[Anonymous]

DP. Therapy is useful for dealing with events in real life. Typically events that you have little control over, at present. Eg not where you want to be in your career, romantic life etc.
Therapy can then be useful to discover why you are unhappy by xyz. But ultimately there needs to be change - either you accept your situation or you make a change so you are happier.

Social media triggering you to the point you need to discuss in therapy- okay, it's worth exploring a bit why it bothers you so much. I don't think it's useful to ask crowd source reactions- you're you, and however other people respond to social medial is irrelevant. Hopefully your therapist is working with you to understand issues like self esteem.

But some PP are wondering why not take the simpler solution' - if it's bothering you, why not just get off social media? Especially if it's the only thing in your life triggering these feelings (if they are, hopefully your therapist has identified that as the issue).

Some things in life take time to change- relationships, careers. It does seem that an obvious solution if it were only social medial causing these negative reactions to get off social media. Not only would you save time and money from therapy, you would have more time in your real life to engage with real people and real events.

It's almost like saying listening to a particular style of music really bothers you. Or a certain TV show really bothers youz creates distress.

OK so turn it off. That's all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it kind of sounds like you're annoyed that others are getting attention for things you do too. Jealousy isn't the right word, maybe validation? Kind of like how when someone has an achievement and gets attention and praise for it so someone butts in with their achievement so they can get praise too. But since you don't post you don't get the attention and that's really what bothers you

This is so untrue. I fly private, and stay in hotel penthouses, and this triggers me when I see it. Showing off is showing off, and it’s awful behavior. If there was no social media, you would not be posting anything and living in the moment and enjoying your memory.

You’re making the assumption that someone is posting to brag when in reality they might not be. You are assigning malicious intent. This is all based on your own morals, values and rigid social media code that you have developed.

And yet you are going out of your way to tell us that you fly private and stay in penthouses.

I think you definitely believe folks shouldn’t be posting certain things on social media and it’s likely because you don’t want them to be on your level. You subconsciously want to be better than others, and it’s obvious you find ways to judge people in order to do that.

Lastly: if you are in therapy, you have issues. Good for you for addressing them in therapy. But some things really shouldn’t require therapy. Sometimes you just need to realize that being easily triggered by silly things is your issue instead of digging in to find support in judging others and making yourself feel better.

Comparable to implicit bias: if you feel bad thoughts creeping up, remind yourself it’s not cool and try to shift your mindset. Don’t feed into it.

In short: try not to be a miserable jerk. Be better.

Op - this post wasn’t me. But thanks!

But I’ve read your other posts, and my advice applies to you. Seriously.

Honestly from your post I think you are kind of a judgemental and miserable jerk.
I at least have the decency to question my judgement and get therapy. You don’t

How old are you? Seriously.

Being triggered by social media indicates *you* have an issue. Ditto for being in therapy. Happy, resilient people aren’t triggered by social media or need therapy.

Again, I applaud your effort to seek help, but at some point you might want to evaluate if therapy is helping. Sometimes it’s actually better to handle yourself rather than seek an audience and validation through a paid therapist. I know several people who wasted years/decades with a therapist when what they really needed to do was stop being so self-centered and fixated on their own thoughts and feelings.

The only reason I’m engaging with you is because you posted here. I don’t judge people irl. If I catch myself going there, I recognize it internally and pivot. Again: it’s a skill people should develop.

Oh dear. Your ignorance is showing.

How's your therapy bill? Maybe that's why you can't afford business class.

No one on here said they can’t afford business class.
Many here said they can but would never post about traveling business class. Literally as tacky as posting a photo of you making it rain with actual cash. I’m serious. It’s that obvious

Ok, they don't see it is tacky, and it drives you nuts. Too bad.

DP here. Tacky people never see their tacky behavior as tacky. Either that or they know its tacky and don't have a problem with being tacky. That doesn't change the fact that it is.

You’l be OK, boo.

Oh, I see. You’re 12. That explains a lot.

Whine more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it kind of sounds like you're annoyed that others are getting attention for things you do too. Jealousy isn't the right word, maybe validation? Kind of like how when someone has an achievement and gets attention and praise for it so someone butts in with their achievement so they can get praise too. But since you don't post you don't get the attention and that's really what bothers you

This is so untrue. I fly private, and stay in hotel penthouses, and this triggers me when I see it. Showing off is showing off, and it’s awful behavior. If there was no social media, you would not be posting anything and living in the moment and enjoying your memory.

You’re making the assumption that someone is posting to brag when in reality they might not be. You are assigning malicious intent. This is all based on your own morals, values and rigid social media code that you have developed.

And yet you are going out of your way to tell us that you fly private and stay in penthouses.

I think you definitely believe folks shouldn’t be posting certain things on social media and it’s likely because you don’t want them to be on your level. You subconsciously want to be better than others, and it’s obvious you find ways to judge people in order to do that.

Lastly: if you are in therapy, you have issues. Good for you for addressing them in therapy. But some things really shouldn’t require therapy. Sometimes you just need to realize that being easily triggered by silly things is your issue instead of digging in to find support in judging others and making yourself feel better.

Comparable to implicit bias: if you feel bad thoughts creeping up, remind yourself it’s not cool and try to shift your mindset. Don’t feed into it.

In short: try not to be a miserable jerk. Be better.

Op - this post wasn’t me. But thanks!

But I’ve read your other posts, and my advice applies to you. Seriously.

Honestly from your post I think you are kind of a judgemental and miserable jerk.
I at least have the decency to question my judgement and get therapy. You don’t

How old are you? Seriously.

Being triggered by social media indicates *you* have an issue. Ditto for being in therapy. Happy, resilient people aren’t triggered by social media or need therapy.

Again, I applaud your effort to seek help, but at some point you might want to evaluate if therapy is helping. Sometimes it’s actually better to handle yourself rather than seek an audience and validation through a paid therapist. I know several people who wasted years/decades with a therapist when what they really needed to do was stop being so self-centered and fixated on their own thoughts and feelings.

The only reason I’m engaging with you is because you posted here. I don’t judge people irl. If I catch myself going there, I recognize it internally and pivot. Again: it’s a skill people should develop.

Oh dear. Your ignorance is showing.

How's your therapy bill? Maybe that's why you can't afford business class.

No one on here said they can’t afford business class.
Many here said they can but would never post about traveling business class. Literally as tacky as posting a photo of you making it rain with actual cash. I’m serious. It’s that obvious

Ok, they don't see it is tacky, and it drives you nuts. Too bad.

DP here. Tacky people never see their tacky behavior as tacky. Either that or they know its tacky and don't have a problem with being tacky. That doesn't change the fact that it is.

You’l be OK, boo.

Oh, I see. You’re 12. That explains a lot.

Whine more.

Sick burn. Reeling from that one

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DP. Therapy is useful for dealing with events in real life. Typically events that you have little control over, at present. Eg not where you want to be in your career, romantic life etc.
Therapy can then be useful to discover why you are unhappy by xyz. But ultimately there needs to be change - either you accept your situation or you make a change so you are happier.

Social media triggering you to the point you need to discuss in therapy- okay, it's worth exploring a bit why it bothers you so much. I don't think it's useful to ask crowd source reactions- you're you, and however other people respond to social medial is irrelevant. Hopefully your therapist is working with you to understand issues like self esteem.

But some PP are wondering why not take the simpler solution' - if it's bothering you, why not just get off social media? Especially if it's the only thing in your life triggering these feelings (if they are, hopefully your therapist has identified that as the issue).

Some things in life take time to change- relationships, careers. It does seem that an obvious solution if it were only social medial causing these negative reactions to get off social media. Not only would you save time and money from therapy, you would have more time in your real life to engage with real people and real events.

It's almost like saying listening to a particular style of music really bothers you. Or a certain TV show really bothers youz creates distress.

OK so turn it off. That's all.

Op - I can’t say this more times.
I work in social media
Also you shouldn’t have to just turn off tv to avoid something that is toxic behavior. It’s also incumbent upon people I think to behave on social media in the same way you would behave in normal life. You can’t stop people from behaving badly overall - but you can point out that acting one way on Instagram and another in real life is a double standard

[Anonymous]

I think it’s best to limit social media posts to things *anyone* can do.

Yes: “Going to see the new Avatar movie!”

No: “Ski trip in Gstaad!”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s best to limit social media posts to things *anyone* can do.

Yes: “Going to see the new Avatar movie!”

No: “Ski trip in Gstaad!”

Op - agree. But also travel I think is ok but like limit the number of posts and keep it somewhat generic - don’t tag resorts and only photograph super expensive activities. Again some ppl are influencers and that’s different but if you’re a regular human just use common sense/ class/ humility

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s best to limit social media posts to things *anyone* can do.

Yes: “Going to see the new Avatar movie!”

No: “Ski trip in Gstaad!”

That insane.

So no college graduations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s best to limit social media posts to things *anyone* can do.

Yes: “Going to see the new Avatar movie!”

No: “Ski trip in Gstaad!”

That insane.

So no college graduations.

I hate social media, but I agree that’s a completely insane expectation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DP. Therapy is useful for dealing with events in real life. Typically events that you have little control over, at present. Eg not where you want to be in your career, romantic life etc.
Therapy can then be useful to discover why you are unhappy by xyz. But ultimately there needs to be change - either you accept your situation or you make a change so you are happier.

Social media triggering you to the point you need to discuss in therapy- okay, it's worth exploring a bit why it bothers you so much. I don't think it's useful to ask crowd source reactions- you're you, and however other people respond to social medial is irrelevant. Hopefully your therapist is working with you to understand issues like self esteem.

But some PP are wondering why not take the simpler solution' - if it's bothering you, why not just get off social media? Especially if it's the only thing in your life triggering these feelings (if they are, hopefully your therapist has identified that as the issue).

Some things in life take time to change- relationships, careers. It does seem that an obvious solution if it were only social medial causing these negative reactions to get off social media. Not only would you save time and money from therapy, you would have more time in your real life to engage with real people and real events.

It's almost like saying listening to a particular style of music really bothers you. Or a certain TV show really bothers youz creates distress.

OK so turn it off. That's all.

Op - I can’t say this more times.
I work in social media
Also you shouldn’t have to just turn off tv to avoid something that is toxic behavior. It’s also incumbent upon people I think to behave on social media in the same way you would behave in normal life. You can’t stop people from behaving badly overall - but you can point out that acting one way on Instagram and another in real life is a double standard

OP, I just want to say I totally agree with you. Even if you didn't work in social media, I think it's okay to talk about what is acceptable social media behavior and what isn't. We're talking about social etiquette here -- what behaviors are pro-social and promote good relationships, what behaviors are anti-social and disrupt relationships.

I personally think that very braggy "look what I'm doing/what I have that you're no/don't have" posting is anti-social. When I can tell the person posting is doing it to show off, it's off putting. At this stage in my life, when I see it, I'm not triggered by it. I just dislike it and it makes me think less of that person. When I encounter people who post like this, I tend to avoid them in real life because in my experience, people who do this tend to be competitive and boring.

And to me it's obvious the difference between a post about travel or family that is pro-social (picture of family together, picture of kids doing something notable, particularly pretty or interesting scenic photo), and something anti-social (picture of luxury good or experience where the focus is on having access to it). Also, sometimes people give themselves away in the captions. When the caption is literally some version of "look at me now!" or "people who do X can suck it because I'm doing Y!", obviously this person is being competitive and trying to prove something or issue some kind of challenge. Anti-social.

I could imagine that if I worked in social media, it would annoy me even more, because you probably spend an above average amount of time thinking about the impact of different kinds of posts on connection and image online. I totally get what your are talking about it, and I'm guessing the reason it bothers you as much as it does is because you don't have the option to just check out like the rest of us can. I don't know if that means you need to look at your career path and see if there might be a way to pivot that would reduce your overall exposure, or if you just need a break, but I get where you are coming from.

[Anonymous]

Can someone please explain what triggered means?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been talking about this with my therapist. I get very very irritated by ppl showing off on social - especially if the showing off is not subtle or ‘well disguised’. It’s partly that I work in marketing (so it annoys me professionally) but like - next level. Case in point - when people tag business class lounges in social media posts. I travel often and usually biz class but I would never ever ever do this. Curious if anyone else finds this type of thing vvvv annoying?
If you do not find it annoying - no need to comment. Really just interested to hear from anyone who does. I would love figure out why I am so triggered and thus move past this

I found social media annoying for different reasons and got off it.

I could not stand the curated images alluding to perfect lives, constant photos of what people were eating, dumb misinformation, political messages as if anyone would be swayed by dogmatic monologues of family and friends. All the misinformation on social media after Trump was elected was the final straw.

I hate what social media is doing to our young people. It’s a cesspool

BINGO!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can someone please explain what triggered means?

It means you're upset, and blaming others for upsetting you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s best to limit social media posts to things *anyone* can do.

Yes: “Going to see the new Avatar movie!”

No: “Ski trip in Gstaad!”

Op - agree. But also travel I think is ok but like limit the number of posts and keep it somewhat generic - don’t tag resorts and only photograph super expensive activities. Again some ppl are influencers and that’s different but if you’re a regular human just use common sense/ class/ humility

Tagging high end brands is my number one pet peeve on social media. Even when it's a brand I can afford and may even have patronized. Is this an ad for the resort, or for the designer your wearing, or the car brand you are driving? If not, you are literally just name dropping brands. Gross.

The only time I get this is if you are patronizing a local business and trying to help them drive business. Like if you get a great cake for your kid's birthday and tag the small local bakery when you post a photo of the cake at the party. Or if you do your anniversary dinner at a local restaurant you love and tag it because you want too support them and get their name out there. But a ski resort in Gstaad does not need your free advertising. Neither does Louis Vuitton or some five star resort in Hawaii. Micheline starred restaurants are borderline, in my mind -- the restaurant business sucks so those places probably do rely on stuff like people tagging them on social media, though in many cases you can tell the person is only doing it so you know they ate at some very high end restaurant (like no one tags the French Laundry to "get the word out").

Basically I really dislike it when regular people act like influencers. If you want to be an influencer, go for it, I don't care. But I will unfollow you because I don't follow influencers on social media -- I follow friends and family. Treat me like your friend or family member, not someone in your "audience". I'm not interested in those kinds of relationships on social media.