Is anyone else super triggered by ppl showing off on social media?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care what other people do? They found something that makes them happy. You go find something tha t makes you happy.

Seriously.

I sure as hell posted my first time in the United lounge, I was excited! It’s my page, so I’ll post what I want. 😌😌

You aren’t forced to look at it.

Op - I am. And you didn’t post it bc you were excited - you posted it bc you wanted ppl to know you were flying biz. It’s very obvious and it would have been obvious to them too.

[Anonymous]

What does triggered mean?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The way to move past this is to deactivate all your social media accounts. You are the problem here, not them.

Op - I work in social media strategy so not possible!
My whole job is to advise clients on voice and tone (among other things) and one of the number one things we tell them is this

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Isn’t this exactly why social media has been proven to make people unhappy? I’m not on social media for several reasons and seeing other people brag isn’t in my top 3 reasons, but it’s on the list! I feel like your experience isn’t uncommon.

Social media causes depression. It is so toxic!

Your life would be much better if you would only ditch social media completely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I understand how you feel and juggle similar emotions.

The idea of turning off these people, closing accounts etc is a solution. But you knew that already. I think you are trying to dig deeper because you know how anxiety works- it wants you to avoid feeling uncomfortable. So by avoiding their feeds, you won’t feel won’t be uncomfortable- annoyed, cringy, etc. And then you won’t be hard on yourself for why these posts bother you. I get it.

It seems you are asking how manage this without avoiding social media- it’s is a brave thing to do because it is THIS sort of approach that gets anxiety out of the way and let’s you change your thinking- which is much harder to do but also healthier.

All this being said - what others have said is also true - here is the design and goal of social media- it isn’t a healthy place to be and don’t beat yourself up over that, you are feeling how we know it makes people feel.

Resist the FOMO, look less, hide people, stop posting, follow lots of other things so your feeds are more interesting.

I get what you are trying to work through, I just don’t know if this addictive form of expression warrants this much effort to manage it mentally. By making is less serious and important, perhaps you can use social media differently in a way that doesn’t bother you so much. It’s not worth it, for you, for anyone. That really is hard to do and you can do it.

We all get those moments of eye rolls when we read something, we get caddy and want to make fun of someone- social media thrives on this sort of thing. I think you are trying to make it such a big thing, and you can with concrete ways- don’t beat yourself up that it bothers you. It’s designed to.

Op - this is such a smart and thoughtful response and you are so right.
I think what also really bothers me is the sort of faux naivete of like - it wasn’t intended to make you feel xyz.
My therapist has a saying (about social also) that when others make us feel a certain way, it’s typically exactly how they want us to feel, whether they admit it or not. And sometimes when it’s really obvious (biz class lounge example) we feel so annoyed with ourselves for taking the bait. But the one thing I totally reject is that people aren’t intending to show off. It’s just that some ppl are better at doing so subtley so you tolerate it bc it’s at least not thirsty

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It isn’t business class lounges for me (I both don’t travel business and don’t consider posting from the business class lounge bragging) but there are certain things people post on social media that make me feel bad (generally things about parenting but not always). There are two things I remind myself when I hit those feelings:
1. We can be envious of our and also happy for them. I acknowledge the “I wish I had that” feeling, then move on to the much more positive “Isn’t it nice Larla has that!” feelings
2. Remind myself that everyone has challenges and blessings in their own lives and that sometimes it helps to talk up the blessings. Depending on situation this means I either remember to count *my* blessings or remind myself that Larla might be having a tough time need some love right now.

I think you may be the nicest person in the world and I need to be more like this!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you still felt the need the clarify to strangers (us) that of course you too fly business class. Heaven forbid we think otherwise!

But yes this is why largely stopped FB and don’t have any of the others at all. It’s unhealthy for everyone involved, even the people who claim to like it.

It was salient for me to clarify bc if I had not then the obvious takeaway would have been ‘you are jealous’. In some cases that’s true but the biz class lounge info illustrates that it is not the whole story

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been talking about this with my therapist. I get very very irritated by ppl showing off on social - especially if the showing off is not subtle or ‘well disguised’. It’s partly that I work in marketing (so it annoys me professionally) but like - next level. Case in point - when people tag business class lounges in social media posts. I travel often and usually biz class but I would never ever ever do this. Curious if anyone else finds this type of thing vvvv annoying?
If you do not find it annoying - no need to comment. Really just interested to hear from anyone who does. I would love figure out why I am so triggered and thus move past this

What is showing off? Are you allowed to show off if your kids did something pretty cool and you bring it up?

Anything can be interpreted as showing off if the reader has a chip on their shoulder.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:European here. These are the new money people and your puritan background makes you feel revolved and a little bit jealous. You want to show off too.

Op - also European and you are right probably

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will flip it on you, OP.

I'm actually really excited when I see my friends achieving something or "showing off." If they are happy and living their best life, I'm truly thrilled for them.

Op - I refuse to believe anyone is actually this pure of heart. Are you Bambi?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care what other people do? They found something that makes them happy. You go find something tha t makes you happy.

Seriously.

I sure as hell posted my first time in the United lounge, I was excited! It’s my page, so I’ll post what I want. 😌😌

You aren’t forced to look at it.

Op - I am. And you didn’t post it bc you were excited - you posted it bc you wanted ppl to know you were flying biz. It’s very obvious and it would have been obvious to them too.

But in your OP you made sure we knew that you too were flying business. You hate them because you are them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I rarely use social media for this reason, but the stuff I find annoying is more the "Happy Anniversary to the most loving, incredible husband ever, blah blah." I just find it so, so strange. I mean, tell your husband! WHY would you post such a thing? I don't really understand the motivation behind it. I wouldn't say I got very annoyed, but I would definitely roll my eyes. But people can post what they want, I made the decision not to look.

Op - 100%. What did that quote say? I’m not the middleman for your communication issues - you live in the same house just go tell them

[Anonymous]

As other PPs have said, you are annoyed because their posting breaks rules of etiquette that you have been taught are unimpeachable. What’s more, there are no “consequences” for their misbehavior and they go right on posting. You are irked that the rules that apply to you don’t apply to them.

I get it OP. I find some SM posts annoying (but not triggering). The answer is that some people are annoying! It’s just part of life, dealing with people who conform to different norms and value systems than you do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know a woman (30s) who is regularly posting on social media when she’s in the airline lounges, complains when then isn’t one because she has to wait with the “gate lice“ it makes comments like “I don’t know how you all do that” when she have to check a bag and have to wait for it. It’s truly insufferable, and I’m not sure why it irritates me so much. On no level am I jealous, it’s more like irritated at her lack of awareness at her own privilege and judgment. She is otherwise a caring human being, so the behavior is seriously baffling.

Op - per my therapist - you feel exactly how she wants you to feel

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care what other people do? They found something that makes them happy. You go find something tha t makes you happy.

Seriously.

I sure as hell posted my first time in the United lounge, I was excited! It’s my page, so I’ll post what I want. 😌😌

You aren’t forced to look at it.

Op - I am. And you didn’t post it bc you were excited - you posted it bc you wanted ppl to know you were flying biz. It’s very obvious and it would have been obvious to them too.

But in your OP you made sure we knew that you too were flying business. You hate them because you are them.

I don’t hate them for flying business. I don’t hate them at all.
I judge them for posting about it on social media