When you didn’t “do enough” as a host

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

No it isn’t, and you’re purposely being obtuse. You think any food put on a small plate is mezze. That’s not correct. You don’t put cold cuts on a plate and call it mezze. The substance of the food is important, and it has to be good. Here, you guys missed the quality part and just kept the cute plates

What's the matter with cold cuts? Or meatballs? Do you disapprove of meatballs for dinner? How do you know what kind of salad OP served? Ham and cheese roll ups, I assume those are the ones like you can buy at Costco. They are huge. I can never eat more than 2.

I don't understand what people mean when they say they can't fill up on things like meatballs, ham and cheese sandwiches, appetizers, desserts, etc. Seriously. How big is your stomach if that won't fill you up?

So I think this is the issue. No, I would not eat meatballs for dinner. Or Costco roll ups, or whatever that is. I would not feed my kids that either. It’s gross. So you can technically fill your stomach with this but it sounds ill to me. I would never serve this, though am learning that some people eat this for dinner . This sounds like a school lunch menu

You don't ever eat meatballs??? Wow. They are always the thing that goes the quickest at my parties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Heavy apps is the same thing as tapas. It's a meal.

I don't know why people are so confused.

They've apparently never had dim sum, tapas, small plates, high tea, maze, heavy apps, etc. I guess they don't get out much and think everything has to be a full meal.

Dude, “cheese balls, salad, ham and cheese roll ups, charcuterie” are not tapas. This is not mezze (I assume that’s what you meant). And it is nothing close to dim sum (which is breakfast btw). I’ve actually lived in country that serves this type of plate, and you’ve grossly misunderstood what it actually is. It’s not cheese roll up. That’s just a grown up lunchable. OP may like adult lunchables but it doesn’t make it dinner

I completely agree. PP here who doesn’t think it’s dinner. I have lived in Spain and I have lived in Greece, and believe me, this is not tapas or mezzo. It’s just food-like filler substances.

In Germany "Brotzeit" is a thing. A dinner thing. Where you have bread, cheese, coldcuts, some pickles, radishes, or veggies, hard boiled eggs, etc. It's delicious.

OP said she had hot and cold foods, including meatballs. To me, that is dinner.

That is hilarious bc the only comparison that I can make to American hospitality culture is German. They are both objectively terrible. Germans are not known for their hospitality or food culture with good reason

I'm sorry you've never met the right Germans. What a pity and you're missing out. And anyone who thinks they don't have a food culture is truly ignorant. Or at least very American.

I didn’t say that they don’t have a food culture but that it’s not a good one. Rather, there’s a reason why it’s not heavily exported. Germans do drinks very well — beer, wine, etc. they also are great at outdoor activities—nature walks, are my fav. I did a wedding in Germany. I love the walk through woods tradition. And they do art! But they are not top bins at food. Sorry

I lived in Germany for years. You have no idea what you're talking about. "Doing a wedding" is not going to introduce you to their wonderful food culture any any way shape or form. You are talking out of your rear end saying "it's not a good food culture."

And actually it's food cultures. Because the food culture up north is going to be different from the food culture in Bavaria. Both with many delicious options. And fantastic, fresh produce. Germans eat by the season. They have amazing cheeses, yogurt, and dairy. Their meats are incredible. Sauerbraten, for god's sake. Pork and fish. Spaetzle. Wonderful cakes, not as sickly sweet as American.

And no one makes better bread. Sorry, not sorry.

So you missed the point entirely in my original post. German hospitality and American hospitality is very on par, with both being subpar to other cultures know for heavy hospitality. Sorry, but it’s 100% true. The hospitality in Germany is not the same as you get in Egypt or Nigeria, eg. Do they have food culture of their own? Of course. And the merits will be subjective, but Re-read expressly Re: culture of hospitality. It’s just not there. Sorry

And yes, bread is good and plentiful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

Costco rollups, meatballs, and cheese puffs are not tapas or mezze.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

Costco rollups, meatballs, and cheese puffs are not tapas or mezze.

Weird you’ve never had meatball tapas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

This. Yes, it's the same. Smaller servings/plates shared by a group of people. Mezze or Tapas presents food from those regions.. . . in America, heavy apps is an equivalent. And it is DEFINITELY something a) I've served and b) I'v had at a restaurant with friends/ family (i.e., heavy apps vs. plates of food).

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:If someone makes a good-faith attempt at hosting, the only polite response is something along the lines of “Thank you for having us.” If a relative wants things her way, she can host. Simple as. Also, I don’t do things for people who complain. Hated the meal? Then I’m not inviting you back to insult me again.

OP here, thank you! It’s not like I put bags of Doritos (!!!) out and called it good. There were hot and cold options, a mix of dips, mini sandwiches, meatballs, taquitos, cheese balls, salad, ham and cheese roll ups, charcuterie and I’m not even sure what else at this point. Not to mention multiple desserts. And drinks for everyone.

Personally, I hate a Turkey dinner. Despise it. But I would never, ever complain about it because I understand the effort that was put into it and someone opened their home to me.

Also, I know the food wasn’t the real issue since our family has done this before (including other people hosting that weren’t me).

When I eat that kind of stuff for dinner, sure it fills me up but it causes me to feel gross. It’s not really a meal, it’s just fat- and carb-heavy snacks.

You, my friend, must be high as a kite. It's called a "buffet" and sounds like there was something for everyone. That is, in fact, dinner.

A mix of dips, mini sandwiches, meatballs, taquitos, cheese balls, salad, ham and cheese roll ups, charcuterie, multiple desserts.

That is “dinner”?

Why wouldn't it be? It's food, prepared food, and fills my stomach at dinnertime. Thusly, it is dinner. You've never gone out and had appetizers only for dinner and shared at the table? Bummer for you. Those are some of the most fun meals. Just had one recently with friends. Got to sample a little of different things, had fun with friends, and was full when I left.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Heavy apps is the same thing as tapas. It's a meal.

I don't know why people are so confused.

They've apparently never had dim sum, tapas, small plates, high tea, maze, heavy apps, etc. I guess they don't get out much and think everything has to be a full meal.

Dude, “cheese balls, salad, ham and cheese roll ups, charcuterie” are not tapas. This is not mezze (I assume that’s what you meant). And it is nothing close to dim sum (which is breakfast btw). I’ve actually lived in country that serves this type of plate, and you’ve grossly misunderstood what it actually is. It’s not cheese roll up. That’s just a grown up lunchable. OP may like adult lunchables but it doesn’t make it dinner

I completely agree. PP here who doesn’t think it’s dinner. I have lived in Spain and I have lived in Greece, and believe me, this is not tapas or mezzo. It’s just food-like filler substances.

In Germany "Brotzeit" is a thing. A dinner thing. Where you have bread, cheese, coldcuts, some pickles, radishes, or veggies, hard boiled eggs, etc. It's delicious.

OP said she had hot and cold foods, including meatballs. To me, that is dinner.

That is hilarious bc the only comparison that I can make to American hospitality culture is German. They are both objectively terrible. Germans are not known for their hospitality or food culture with good reason

I'm sorry you've never met the right Germans. What a pity and you're missing out. And anyone who thinks they don't have a food culture is truly ignorant. Or at least very American.

I didn’t say that they don’t have a food culture but that it’s not a good one. Rather, there’s a reason why it’s not heavily exported. Germans do drinks very well — beer, wine, etc. they also are great at outdoor activities—nature walks, are my fav. I did a wedding in Germany. I love the walk through woods tradition. And they do art! But they are not top bins at food. Sorry

I lived in Germany for years. You have no idea what you're talking about. "Doing a wedding" is not going to introduce you to their wonderful food culture any any way shape or form. You are talking out of your rear end saying "it's not a good food culture."

And actually it's food cultures. Because the food culture up north is going to be different from the food culture in Bavaria. Both with many delicious options. And fantastic, fresh produce. Germans eat by the season. They have amazing cheeses, yogurt, and dairy. Their meats are incredible. Sauerbraten, for god's sake. Pork and fish. Spaetzle. Wonderful cakes, not as sickly sweet as American.

And no one makes better bread. Sorry, not sorry.

So you missed the point entirely in my original post. German hospitality and American hospitality is very on par, with both being subpar to other cultures know for heavy hospitality. Sorry, but it’s 100% true. The hospitality in Germany is not the same as you get in Egypt or Nigeria, eg. Do they have food culture of their own? Of course. And the merits will be subjective, but Re-read expressly Re: culture of hospitality. It’s just not there. Sorry

And yes, bread is good and plentiful.

I'll say it again. Sorry you haven't met the right Germans. i have and they are incredibly hospitable.

What you seem to be caught up on is the amount of food served. I have never had any problems being served plenty of food and drink, more than enough, at any German dinner/party/wedding I've been to, or even just an afternoon visit. Sunday afternoon kaffee und kuchen? You are missing out if you've never experienced that. And one of the best things about German culture is that when there is a party for a birthday or wedding, people come and stay for a long time, really truly socializing. All the weddings I've ever been to in Germany went on until 2-3 in the morning. And everyone stayed, including the elderly, talking and laughing and giving toasts and dancing. German hospitality is nowhere near what you are stereotyping it as. Your impression based on one wedding is a shallow one.

Now the Brits and the Dutch and the Scandinavians. They might be stingy on the food offerings if you go visit people's homes. But even that is just a matter of who you know. Same in America. I know plenty of Americans including myself and everyone in my family, who will put out way more food and drink than necessary for visitors, and send home leftovers with guests. It's really too bad your circle of friends/relatives are such tightwads. Get out and meet new people!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

No, I'm not being rigid. I've said repeatedly that subjectively I dislike the menus and hosting styles listed above. It is unappealing to me to eat finger foods all day. I find it a bit lazy and inhospitable. I don't know how many times to repeat that it is clearly a subjective assessment. Objectively, however, a ham and cheese roll up from Costco is not a meal, though it does resemble a 2nd grade lunch box.

And on what planet do you only serve one entree for guests to eat? We did the holidays. We had 10-12 different options. I didn't need a small plate of hot dogs to feed people. But I do recognize that our guests eat like us. We don't have guests who aren't accustomed to our foods so it would never occur to me to make the foods that you mentioned.

[Anonymous]

Does Costco do ham roll ups? I've had their turkey ones.