When you didn’t “do enough” as a host

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

No, I'm not being rigid. I've said repeatedly that subjectively I dislike the menus and hosting styles listed above. It is unappealing to me to eat finger foods all day. I find it a bit lazy and inhospitable. I don't know how many times to repeat that it is clearly a subjective assessment. Objectively, however, a ham and cheese roll up from Costco is not a meal, though it does resemble a 2nd grade lunch box.

And on what planet do you only serve one entree for guests to eat? We did the holidays. We had 10-12 different options. I didn't need a small plate of hot dogs to feed people. But I do recognize that our guests eat like us. We don't have guests who aren't accustomed to our foods so it would never occur to me to make the foods that you mentioned.

LOL being rigid there again, mate, telling people what is and is not a meal. That is the definition of subjective - your own opinion about what a meal should be. Also funny you only invite people over who eat like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

No, I'm not being rigid. I've said repeatedly that subjectively I dislike the menus and hosting styles listed above. It is unappealing to me to eat finger foods all day. I find it a bit lazy and inhospitable. I don't know how many times to repeat that it is clearly a subjective assessment. Objectively, however, a ham and cheese roll up from Costco is not a meal, though it does resemble a 2nd grade lunch box.

And on what planet do you only serve one entree for guests to eat? We did the holidays. We had 10-12 different options. I didn't need a small plate of hot dogs to feed people. But I do recognize that our guests eat like us. We don't have guests who aren't accustomed to our foods so it would never occur to me to make the foods that you mentioned.

You served 10-12 different entrees at one get together? What are you, a Cheesecake Factory?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

No, I'm not being rigid. I've said repeatedly that subjectively I dislike the menus and hosting styles listed above. It is unappealing to me to eat finger foods all day. I find it a bit lazy and inhospitable. I don't know how many times to repeat that it is clearly a subjective assessment. Objectively, however, a ham and cheese roll up from Costco is not a meal, though it does resemble a 2nd grade lunch box.

And on what planet do you only serve one entree for guests to eat? We did the holidays. We had 10-12 different options. I didn't need a small plate of hot dogs to feed people. But I do recognize that our guests eat like us. We don't have guests who aren't accustomed to our foods so it would never occur to me to make the foods that you mentioned.

You served 10-12 different entrees at one get together? What are you, a Cheesecake Factory?

Tell me you don't cook, without telling me that you don't cook.
PP perfectly encapsulates this divide. Those who think serving meals is only something that you get at a "cheesecake factory" and those who don't. This is clearly a cultural schism. Enjoy your hot dogs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

No, I'm not being rigid. I've said repeatedly that subjectively I dislike the menus and hosting styles listed above. It is unappealing to me to eat finger foods all day. I find it a bit lazy and inhospitable. I don't know how many times to repeat that it is clearly a subjective assessment. Objectively, however, a ham and cheese roll up from Costco is not a meal, though it does resemble a 2nd grade lunch box.

And on what planet do you only serve one entree for guests to eat? We did the holidays. We had 10-12 different options. I didn't need a small plate of hot dogs to feed people. But I do recognize that our guests eat like us. We don't have guests who aren't accustomed to our foods so it would never occur to me to make the foods that you mentioned.

You served 10-12 different entrees at one get together? What are you, a Cheesecake Factory?

Tell me you don't cook, without telling me that you don't cook.
PP perfectly encapsulates this divide. Those who think serving meals is only something that you get at a "cheesecake factory" and those who don't. This is clearly a cultural schism. Enjoy your hot dogs

NP I’m old and ive been to many, many dinner parties/holiday gatherings. I’ve never experienced that many entrees, even among “those who cook.” It’s nowhere near the norm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see no problem with heavy apps as long as everyone knew to expect that. Re. the time - did you make people feel they needed to leave when you put the kids to bed? (In which case I can see why she would be disappointed with a late start time or find it rude?)

The kids were still awake when everyone left. I let them stay up until people leave

And yes they were told it was heavy apps. It’s what we did last year and everyone seemed to love it then.

What did you do every other year? You seem to be pinning it all one last year and that one time you had heavy apps. And also only your sister gave you a hard time, not everyone else. Just roll your eyes and move on because clearly you and your sister have issues. Maybe you were rude to her last year and she's just giving it back.

It’s varied. Never traditional Turkey and sides though, no one really likes it. Italian, Mexican, mostly. We’ve done heavy apps more than just last year. I don’t know, I don’t think it really matters TBH. I would never ever go to someone’s house as a guest and complain. My MIL makes some truly weird things and I never would say something to her ever.

stop.......focusing......on.....the ...............food..............

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

They will just play dumb and act confused. Heavy what? What is an appetizer? When they have been invited for heavy appetizers in lieu of dinner.

The topic is not about the food. Reread please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If someone makes a good-faith attempt at hosting, the only polite response is something along the lines of “Thank you for having us.” If a relative wants things her way, she can host. Simple as. Also, I don’t do things for people who complain. Hated the meal? Then I’m not inviting you back to insult me again.

OP here, thank you! It’s not like I put bags of Doritos (!!!) out and called it good. There were hot and cold options, a mix of dips, mini sandwiches, meatballs, taquitos, cheese balls, salad, ham and cheese roll ups, charcuterie and I’m not even sure what else at this point. Not to mention multiple desserts. And drinks for everyone.

Personally, I hate a Turkey dinner. Despise it. But I would never, ever complain about it because I understand the effort that was put into it and someone opened their home to me.

Also, I know the food wasn’t the real issue since our family has done this before (including other people hosting that weren’t me).

That's not a meal. That's a snack.

Would you serve all of the items OP served and then serve whatever you consider to be “dinner?”

OP here.. the problem was not the food

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

No, I'm not being rigid. I've said repeatedly that subjectively I dislike the menus and hosting styles listed above. It is unappealing to me to eat finger foods all day. I find it a bit lazy and inhospitable. I don't know how many times to repeat that it is clearly a subjective assessment. Objectively, however, a ham and cheese roll up from Costco is not a meal, though it does resemble a 2nd grade lunch box.

And on what planet do you only serve one entree for guests to eat? We did the holidays. We had 10-12 different options. I didn't need a small plate of hot dogs to feed people. But I do recognize that our guests eat like us. We don't have guests who aren't accustomed to our foods so it would never occur to me to make the foods that you mentioned.

You served 10-12 different entrees at one get together? What are you, a Cheesecake Factory?

No, Mel's Diner. Today's Lunch Special is breakfast's leftover oatmeal and bacon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

No, I'm not being rigid. I've said repeatedly that subjectively I dislike the menus and hosting styles listed above. It is unappealing to me to eat finger foods all day. I find it a bit lazy and inhospitable. I don't know how many times to repeat that it is clearly a subjective assessment. Objectively, however, a ham and cheese roll up from Costco is not a meal, though it does resemble a 2nd grade lunch box.

And on what planet do you only serve one entree for guests to eat? We did the holidays. We had 10-12 different options. I didn't need a small plate of hot dogs to feed people. But I do recognize that our guests eat like us. We don't have guests who aren't accustomed to our foods so it would never occur to me to make the foods that you mentioned.

You served 10-12 different entrees at one get together? What are you, a Cheesecake Factory?

Tell me you don't cook, without telling me that you don't cook.
PP perfectly encapsulates this divide. Those who think serving meals is only something that you get at a "cheesecake factory" and those who don't. This is clearly a cultural schism. Enjoy your hot dogs

Please tell is what 10-12 entrees would be at a family dinner. It better be entrees and sides too since the rigid one is being so specific about exact words.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

No, I'm not being rigid. I've said repeatedly that subjectively I dislike the menus and hosting styles listed above. It is unappealing to me to eat finger foods all day. I find it a bit lazy and inhospitable. I don't know how many times to repeat that it is clearly a subjective assessment. Objectively, however, a ham and cheese roll up from Costco is not a meal, though it does resemble a 2nd grade lunch box.

And on what planet do you only serve one entree for guests to eat? We did the holidays. We had 10-12 different options. I didn't need a small plate of hot dogs to feed people. But I do recognize that our guests eat like us. We don't have guests who aren't accustomed to our foods so it would never occur to me to make the foods that you mentioned.

You served 10-12 different entrees at one get together? What are you, a Cheesecake Factory?

Tell me you don't cook, without telling me that you don't cook.
PP perfectly encapsulates this divide. Those who think serving meals is only something that you get at a "cheesecake factory" and those who don't. This is clearly a cultural schism. Enjoy your hot dogs

Please tell is what 10-12 entrees would be at a family dinner. It better be entrees and sides too since the rigid one is being so specific about exact words.

Typo: Entrees NOT sides

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

No, I'm not being rigid. I've said repeatedly that subjectively I dislike the menus and hosting styles listed above. It is unappealing to me to eat finger foods all day. I find it a bit lazy and inhospitable. I don't know how many times to repeat that it is clearly a subjective assessment. Objectively, however, a ham and cheese roll up from Costco is not a meal, though it does resemble a 2nd grade lunch box.

And on what planet do you only serve one entree for guests to eat? We did the holidays. We had 10-12 different options. I didn't need a small plate of hot dogs to feed people. But I do recognize that our guests eat like us. We don't have guests who aren't accustomed to our foods so it would never occur to me to make the foods that you mentioned.

You served 10-12 different entrees at one get together? What are you, a Cheesecake Factory?

NP. The previous poster did not say she had 10-12 entrees. She implied that she made more than one entree, and state that she had 10-12 options (which I take to mean including side dishes). To me, her post read as someone who offered (just as an example) beef tenderloin or vegetable lasagna as entree options, and then numerous side dishes (options) in addition to more than one entree.

[Anonymous]

I asked excitedly earlier for OP’s menu and now that I’ve seen it… not great.

Yes it can be considered dinner but it is unappetizing. Yes you can “fill up” on it but you will feel terrible the next day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe if they were called tapas or mezze people might recognize that what OP served was perfectly “hospitable.”

+1 Do these people never eat tapas or mezze? Some of my favorite meals!

You guys don’t know what mezze is. Mezze is full salads, kibbe, fattoush, tabbouli, sambousik, fassoulia, etc. It is actual salad, grains, prepared meats, stuffed pies and similar. Mezze is not bagel bites and rolled ham and cheese. We spend a lot of time with family on the Med. You are confusing any food put on a small plate with mezze, without realizing that mezze isn’t some cheese puff.

Now you might like cheese puffs for dinner (and you do you!) but stop calling it tapas/mezze! And no, we never serve mezze at home. It’s just a restaurant thing bc they need the smaller plates

You’re being pedantic. The idea is the same.

The food bears no resemblance.

Why does it have to? Appetizers are appetizers. That’s the point. The style of serving small plates of food goes by many names.

That’s where we seem to have discord. Some PPs think appetizers are dinner. Others think appetizers are only a small bite, pre-dinner portion that’s not intended to be a full meal. I wouldn’t view bruschetta and ham, or a pig in blanket as dinner. So many of us would just be surprised if that’s all that was served. Mezze, traditionally, are full dishes. Actual cultural dishes that are often nutritious and substantive, just in a smaller size. Mezze aren’t appetizers

Ham is what my mother has served as the main course for Christmas for 60 years. And her mother served it for Christmas for years as well. It's a traditional Christmas dinner for many. What a weird thing to say.

Pigs in a blanket is just like eating a hot dog, only fancier and not as big which means you can eat more of other things. And a hot dog is an American style sausage, which are served in many countries as dinner.

You are very rigid in your definitions of what one can / should eat when.

Look, you can eat all the American hot dogs that you want for Christmas dinner. The menu to me is still unappealing. It's not what I would ever serve but perhaps we just cook more. Cooking culture is very big in my family. I understand that is not the case for all, and for many people cooking is a chore. Particularly around the holidays. I don't actually care what you eat (or what OPs family eats) but PPs are clearly misguided in what they think a meal vs appetizers are. That was my point. If you enjoy only appetizers, fine. I have learned when we need to eat before heading over to a party and when not so this thread is enlightening.

And no, bruschetta with a slice of parma ham on it is not a Christmas ham dinner. You're purposefully misreading text.

And you are being rigid in insisting your definition of a meal is the only one out there.

I am an experienced cook. Appetizers / finger foods can take a hell of a long time to prepare and cook. Way longer than putting a roast and potatoes in the oven.

You also refuse to acknowledge that serving lots of different kinds of "appetizers" can be a godsend for people who aren't interested in/can't eat the main "big" entree for whatever reason.

No, I'm not being rigid. I've said repeatedly that subjectively I dislike the menus and hosting styles listed above. It is unappealing to me to eat finger foods all day. I find it a bit lazy and inhospitable. I don't know how many times to repeat that it is clearly a subjective assessment. Objectively, however, a ham and cheese roll up from Costco is not a meal, though it does resemble a 2nd grade lunch box.

And on what planet do you only serve one entree for guests to eat? We did the holidays. We had 10-12 different options. I didn't need a small plate of hot dogs to feed people. But I do recognize that our guests eat like us. We don't have guests who aren't accustomed to our foods so it would never occur to me to make the foods that you mentioned.

You served 10-12 different entrees at one get together? What are you, a Cheesecake Factory?

NP. The previous poster did not say she had 10-12 entrees. She implied that she made more than one entree, and state that she had 10-12 options (which I take to mean including side dishes). To me, her post read as someone who offered (just as an example) beef tenderloin or vegetable lasagna as entree options, and then numerous side dishes (options) in addition to more than one entree.

So like what everyone else is doing. What's so special about it again?

[Anonymous]

^ I can totally see someone being treated to that menu and thinking, wow the host really doesn’t give AF