Anyone’s child get pregnant during college?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did. Had an abortion.

+1. It was a good decision for me.

+1

This is nothing to be proud of by the way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did. Had an abortion.

+1. It was a good decision for me.

+1

This is nothing to be proud of by the way.

No, but it's a lot more sensible than derailing your life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

If you can't see what serious potential future problems you'd be setting yourself up for by pushing your adult daughter to have an abortion....we can't help you.

And if you can’t see the problem with pressuring someone to put a baby up for adoption, we can’t help you.

Or if you can’t with having a baby at 20 with no degree, no partner for support, and no money or means of financial support— at a time when Medicaid is being dismantled, CHIP is being defunded, TANF and SNAP are being severely cut, etc, we can’t help you. We get it, you are pro-birth. But poor-Birthers like to end the story as soon as the beautiful white bay is born. If they didn’t, they would have to explain why. There is no social safety net for a young girl, alone with a screaming infant, worried that the kid is sick and unable to take them to the doctor because it is too expensive. Plus, if the kid is sick, the crappy daycare they could afford won’t take them, so they cam’t atrend class. And they can’t afford to fix the car or pay for gas, so they need to take the baby on the bus. And they don’t know how they can afford to feed the kid after the second week of the month, so they are skipping meals.

If you think this is okay... we can’t help you.

There are no great options.

Don 't forget that the father is a college student. He is going to graduate and will be forced to pay child support. His income could be very good in a few years

Adoption is an option for the poor people who cannot support a high school student finish school

There is no need for doom and gloom in this scenario. The worst thing you can do is demonize single parenthood. It really is not that bad, plenty of people do it.




You shouldn’t demonize being a single parent. Or adoption. Or abortion. But in the end, none of these are great options. You have to pick the best of the bad. And I’m tired of people pretending single parenthood is rainbows and unicorns. It’s not. It feels one one anti-choicer posting, “my xxxx got pregnant in college. Married the dad. Had a few rough years (glossing over this part) got an advanced degree, had more kids, has been happily married for 25 year.” Yes. O’m Sure this happens. But statistically it is very much not the he norm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm truly sorry to sound so harsh but all these stories have little relevance to today's environment. It's 2018 and very few excuses for accidently getting pregnant any more. Much better birth control and education than in our youth. OP's daughter doesn't sound mature enough to make the right decisions regarding raising a child responsibly. This is more than financial support. Are you prepared emotionally to raise another young child now as that is what this will ultimately mean until your daughter grows up. Yes I appreciate that you feel you have to appreciate her decision but make it clear that as the decision impacts you, you also have the right to weigh in with a no interest. Frankly you've already said you would vote for abortion so IMO you really don't want this. And your daughter depending on friends is very unreliable support. Unfortunately, she'll be living with the impacts of this for life no matter what she does. I had an abortion, I know. I also know that the quality life I could have supplied a child at that time would have been very emotionally substandard as a mom. Your daughter own brain is still in formation. There's nothing you can do if she insists but I personally would strongly encourage not going through this. Sorry, I know all of you have these lovely stories about great kids now however, it takes a village in those circumstances and villages are becoming increasingly rare.

You had an abortion. Great. Worked for you. Many other women choose not to in OP’s circumstances and it’s great for them. You don’t need to justify your own decision by criticizing the OP’s daughter as immature

[Anonymous]

We had a first year investment banker show up with a pregnant newlywed wife, but not in freshman year of college.

Only way that works is if you go Old Country and grandma raises the baby, and adult kid sends some money once she AND HE have a job.

[Anonymous]

ie, a 22 yo guy. quickie wedding. still married and has 3 kids now, 15 years later. was in my analyst class, we threw him a baby shower. i was 24 at the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did. Had an abortion.

+1. It was a good decision for me.

+1

This is nothing to be proud of by the way.

How many children have you adopted?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. She will not abort. Right now she wants to do the fall semester and then reevaluate...I do worry about the idea she’ll take time off and then never go back...adoption is still on the table too though.

The father goes to a different school 1200 miles away (they met at an internship) and they were never together.

Good that your daughter won't abort the baby. That can be the worst trauma for women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. She will not abort. Right now she wants to do the fall semester and then reevaluate...I do worry about the idea she’ll take time off and then never go back...adoption is still on the table too though.

The father goes to a different school 1200 miles away (they met at an internship) and they were never together.

Good that your daughter won't abort the baby. That can be the worst trauma for women.

*I'll say •one• of the worst traumas...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. She will not abort. Right now she wants to do the fall semester and then reevaluate...I do worry about the idea she’ll take time off and then never go back...adoption is still on the table too though.

The father goes to a different school 1200 miles away (they met at an internship) and they were never together.

Good that your daughter won't abort the baby. That can be the worst trauma for women.

*I'll say •one• of the worst traumas...

No, adoption is, especially if you get the wrong adoptive family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. She will not abort. Right now she wants to do the fall semester and then reevaluate...I do worry about the idea she’ll take time off and then never go back...adoption is still on the table too though.

The father goes to a different school 1200 miles away (they met at an internship) and they were never together.

Good that your daughter won't abort the baby. That can be the worst trauma for women.

*I'll say •one• of the worst traumas...

No, adoption is, especially if you get the wrong adoptive family.

Especially if they deform you or something like that. Do you personally know of some horrific child abuse situation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. She will not abort. Right now she wants to do the fall semester and then reevaluate...I do worry about the idea she’ll take time off and then never go back...adoption is still on the table too though.

The father goes to a different school 1200 miles away (they met at an internship) and they were never together.

Good that your daughter won't abort the baby. That can be the worst trauma for women.

*I'll say •one• of the worst traumas...

95% of women don’t regret their abortion.
http://time.com/3956781/women-abortion-regret-reproductive-health/

[Anonymous]

My SIL did. She took a few weeks off and MIL and FIL took care of baby until she graduated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My SIL did. She took a few weeks off and MIL and FIL took care of baby until she graduated.

Sweet. "It takes a family."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My SIL did. She took a few weeks off and MIL and FIL took care of baby until she graduated.

That's a seriously hillbilly/ghetto move.