Can’t have water, apparently

[Anonymous]

OP, does your MIL have an eating disorder and uses water restriction as a way to lose weight or in her warped view is trying to prevent you from gaining weight (the horror)? Maybe it’s not about the water glasses or bottles at all…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL is going to lose her mind when the baby comes. Is she going to empty out and wash the bottles?

OP here. I guess we won’t be finding out, as DH and I left earlier than planned and have agreed that it’s best if we stay in a hotel going forward. We wouldn’t want MIL and FIL to be upset by any mess we might make with a new baby in their house. They can come to us, or perhaps we’ll stay with MIL’s sister, DH’s favorite aunt, who lives close to MIL. She’s a really easygoing hostess.

Thanks all for the perspectives!

So was it more than the water glasses that was causing a problem?

OP here. Yes, everything is so rigid. Everyone expected to sit in a circle and talk at all times, no breaks or even leafing through a magazine. No food outside of sparse, set meals with MIL loudly commenting on portions. No deviating from set plans, even if new opportunities or whims come up. Everything has to be done a certain way, you’re not even allowed to sleep with your door completely closed. We’ve had enough rigidity and have decided that it was one thing to walk on eggshells when it was just us, but we won’t be wasting our energy on that when baby is here.

No problem, they can visit us, or we can stay in a hotel, or we can stay with DH’s aunt who lives near them, and is so warm and accommodating.

So you buried the big picture under the one detail about water glasses. And you're only giving the real and infinitely more meaningful context above, now, many, many pages into this thread. If your communication and ability to identify actual issues are this weak, no wonder you can't cope or use words with MIL like an adult. I'm sure you feel so very aggrieved and right. I would have agreed with you, too--back on page one. But the choice to focus here on the water nonsense instead of telling us about the far larger totality of things is a sympathy-killer for me. Not that you care, of course! You've also now produced for us the wonderful aunt who solves the whole problem!

Why the F post in the first place?! Auntie didn't just materialize, and neither did your issues with MIL. But hey, the water glass anecdote was just too vivid to resist posting as if it were the main event!

Whoa. Are you ok?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL is going to lose her mind when the baby comes. Is she going to empty out and wash the bottles?

OP here. I guess we won’t be finding out, as DH and I left earlier than planned and have agreed that it’s best if we stay in a hotel going forward. We wouldn’t want MIL and FIL to be upset by any mess we might make with a new baby in their house. They can come to us, or perhaps we’ll stay with MIL’s sister, DH’s favorite aunt, who lives close to MIL. She’s a really easygoing hostess.

Thanks all for the perspectives!

So was it more than the water glasses that was causing a problem?

OP here. Yes, everything is so rigid. Everyone expected to sit in a circle and talk at all times, no breaks or even leafing through a magazine. No food outside of sparse, set meals with MIL loudly commenting on portions. No deviating from set plans, even if new opportunities or whims come up. Everything has to be done a certain way, you’re not even allowed to sleep with your door completely closed. We’ve had enough rigidity and have decided that it was one thing to walk on eggshells when it was just us, but we won’t be wasting our energy on that when baby is here.

No problem, they can visit us, or we can stay in a hotel, or we can stay with DH’s aunt who lives near them, and is so warm and accommodating.

So you buried the big picture under the one detail about water glasses. And you're only giving the real and infinitely more meaningful context above, now, many, many pages into this thread. If your communication and ability to identify actual issues are this weak, no wonder you can't cope or use words with MIL like an adult. I'm sure you feel so very aggrieved and right. I would have agreed with you, too--back on page one. But the choice to focus here on the water nonsense instead of telling us about the far larger totality of things is a sympathy-killer for me. Not that you care, of course! You've also now produced for us the wonderful aunt who solves the whole problem!

Why the F post in the first place?! Auntie didn't just materialize, and neither did your issues with MIL. But hey, the water glass anecdote was just too vivid to resist posting as if it were the main event!

That should be OP's face. She has valid complaints more serious than the water glass stupidity, yet only trickled them out 15 pages in.

Yea, no. PP’s rage over something that didn’t happen to her is insane. Completely bonkers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL is going to lose her mind when the baby comes. Is she going to empty out and wash the bottles?

OP here. I guess we won’t be finding out, as DH and I left earlier than planned and have agreed that it’s best if we stay in a hotel going forward. We wouldn’t want MIL and FIL to be upset by any mess we might make with a new baby in their house. They can come to us, or perhaps we’ll stay with MIL’s sister, DH’s favorite aunt, who lives close to MIL. She’s a really easygoing hostess.

Thanks all for the perspectives!

So was it more than the water glasses that was causing a problem?

OP here. Yes, everything is so rigid. Everyone expected to sit in a circle and talk at all times, no breaks or even leafing through a magazine. No food outside of sparse, set meals with MIL loudly commenting on portions. No deviating from set plans, even if new opportunities or whims come up. Everything has to be done a certain way, you’re not even allowed to sleep with your door completely closed. We’ve had enough rigidity and have decided that it was one thing to walk on eggshells when it was just us, but we won’t be wasting our energy on that when baby is here.

No problem, they can visit us, or we can stay in a hotel, or we can stay with DH’s aunt who lives near them, and is so warm and accommodating.

So you buried the big picture under the one detail about water glasses. And you're only giving the real and infinitely more meaningful context above, now, many, many pages into this thread. If your communication and ability to identify actual issues are this weak, no wonder you can't cope or use words with MIL like an adult. I'm sure you feel so very aggrieved and right. I would have agreed with you, too--back on page one. But the choice to focus here on the water nonsense instead of telling us about the far larger totality of things is a sympathy-killer for me. Not that you care, of course! You've also now produced for us the wonderful aunt who solves the whole problem!

Why the F post in the first place?! Auntie didn't just materialize, and neither did your issues with MIL. But hey, the water glass anecdote was just too vivid to resist posting as if it were the main event!

The water glasses encapsulate the whole problem nicely and only compulsive fault-finders could get mad about the story being told in that way.

The water glass thing on its own would be a quirk that could be ignored if other things were OK. It only "encapsulates the whole problem" if you know there's a larger problem for it to encapsulate...which we did not, because the big picture was just an afterthought to OP.

But points to you for doing that classic DCUM thing of instantly diagnosing a stranger based on one post! The only thing compulsive about me is my loathing for time-wasting OPs.

[Anonymous]

I think you need to, what is it that the kids say, touch grass. Back away and power down a bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL is going to lose her mind when the baby comes. Is she going to empty out and wash the bottles?

OP here. I guess we won’t be finding out, as DH and I left earlier than planned and have agreed that it’s best if we stay in a hotel going forward. We wouldn’t want MIL and FIL to be upset by any mess we might make with a new baby in their house. They can come to us, or perhaps we’ll stay with MIL’s sister, DH’s favorite aunt, who lives close to MIL. She’s a really easygoing hostess.

Thanks all for the perspectives!

So was it more than the water glasses that was causing a problem?

OP here. Yes, everything is so rigid. Everyone expected to sit in a circle and talk at all times, no breaks or even leafing through a magazine. No food outside of sparse, set meals with MIL loudly commenting on portions. No deviating from set plans, even if new opportunities or whims come up. Everything has to be done a certain way, you’re not even allowed to sleep with your door completely closed. We’ve had enough rigidity and have decided that it was one thing to walk on eggshells when it was just us, but we won’t be wasting our energy on that when baby is here.

No problem, they can visit us, or we can stay in a hotel, or we can stay with DH’s aunt who lives near them, and is so warm and accommodating.

So you buried the big picture under the one detail about water glasses. And you're only giving the real and infinitely more meaningful context above, now, many, many pages into this thread. If your communication and ability to identify actual issues are this weak, no wonder you can't cope or use words with MIL like an adult. I'm sure you feel so very aggrieved and right. I would have agreed with you, too--back on page one. But the choice to focus here on the water nonsense instead of telling us about the far larger totality of things is a sympathy-killer for me. Not that you care, of course! You've also now produced for us the wonderful aunt who solves the whole problem!

Why the F post in the first place?! Auntie didn't just materialize, and neither did your issues with MIL. But hey, the water glass anecdote was just too vivid to resist posting as if it were the main event!

That should be OP's face. She has valid complaints more serious than the water glass stupidity, yet only trickled them out 15 pages in.

Yea, no. PP’s rage over something that didn’t happen to her is insane. Completely bonkers.

Love how people here revert to criticizing those who point out that OP buried the lead.

[Anonymous]

PS: It always encapsulates a deeper problem, PP. Almost everyone here got that. This deep level of weird doesn't happen in isolation.

For whatever reason, you didn't get it, and this upsets you. But DCUM isn't worth it, you know?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL is going to lose her mind when the baby comes. Is she going to empty out and wash the bottles?

OP here. I guess we won’t be finding out, as DH and I left earlier than planned and have agreed that it’s best if we stay in a hotel going forward. We wouldn’t want MIL and FIL to be upset by any mess we might make with a new baby in their house. They can come to us, or perhaps we’ll stay with MIL’s sister, DH’s favorite aunt, who lives close to MIL. She’s a really easygoing hostess.

Thanks all for the perspectives!

So was it more than the water glasses that was causing a problem?

OP here. Yes, everything is so rigid. Everyone expected to sit in a circle and talk at all times, no breaks or even leafing through a magazine. No food outside of sparse, set meals with MIL loudly commenting on portions. No deviating from set plans, even if new opportunities or whims come up. Everything has to be done a certain way, you’re not even allowed to sleep with your door completely closed. We’ve had enough rigidity and have decided that it was one thing to walk on eggshells when it was just us, but we won’t be wasting our energy on that when baby is here.

No problem, they can visit us, or we can stay in a hotel, or we can stay with DH’s aunt who lives near them, and is so warm and accommodating.

So you buried the big picture under the one detail about water glasses. And you're only giving the real and infinitely more meaningful context above, now, many, many pages into this thread. If your communication and ability to identify actual issues are this weak, no wonder you can't cope or use words with MIL like an adult. I'm sure you feel so very aggrieved and right. I would have agreed with you, too--back on page one. But the choice to focus here on the water nonsense instead of telling us about the far larger totality of things is a sympathy-killer for me. Not that you care, of course! You've also now produced for us the wonderful aunt who solves the whole problem!

Why the F post in the first place?! Auntie didn't just materialize, and neither did your issues with MIL. But hey, the water glass anecdote was just too vivid to resist posting as if it were the main event!

That should be OP's face. She has valid complaints more serious than the water glass stupidity, yet only trickled them out 15 pages in.

Yea, no. PP’s rage over something that didn’t happen to her is insane. Completely bonkers.

Love how people here revert to criticizing those who point out that OP buried the lead.

(no, "lede")

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL is going to lose her mind when the baby comes. Is she going to empty out and wash the bottles?

OP here. I guess we won’t be finding out, as DH and I left earlier than planned and have agreed that it’s best if we stay in a hotel going forward. We wouldn’t want MIL and FIL to be upset by any mess we might make with a new baby in their house. They can come to us, or perhaps we’ll stay with MIL’s sister, DH’s favorite aunt, who lives close to MIL. She’s a really easygoing hostess.

Thanks all for the perspectives!

So was it more than the water glasses that was causing a problem?

OP here. Yes, everything is so rigid. Everyone expected to sit in a circle and talk at all times, no breaks or even leafing through a magazine. No food outside of sparse, set meals with MIL loudly commenting on portions. No deviating from set plans, even if new opportunities or whims come up. Everything has to be done a certain way, you’re not even allowed to sleep with your door completely closed. We’ve had enough rigidity and have decided that it was one thing to walk on eggshells when it was just us, but we won’t be wasting our energy on that when baby is here.

No problem, they can visit us, or we can stay in a hotel, or we can stay with DH’s aunt who lives near them, and is so warm and accommodating.

So you buried the big picture under the one detail about water glasses. And you're only giving the real and infinitely more meaningful context above, now, many, many pages into this thread. If your communication and ability to identify actual issues are this weak, no wonder you can't cope or use words with MIL like an adult. I'm sure you feel so very aggrieved and right. I would have agreed with you, too--back on page one. But the choice to focus here on the water nonsense instead of telling us about the far larger totality of things is a sympathy-killer for me. Not that you care, of course! You've also now produced for us the wonderful aunt who solves the whole problem!

Why the F post in the first place?! Auntie didn't just materialize, and neither did your issues with MIL. But hey, the water glass anecdote was just too vivid to resist posting as if it were the main event!

That should be OP's face. She has valid complaints more serious than the water glass stupidity, yet only trickled them out 15 pages in.

Yea, no. PP’s rage over something that didn’t happen to her is insane. Completely bonkers.

Love how people here revert to criticizing those who point out that OP buried the lead.

You’re being criticized for your out of proportion response. Had you just say “way to bury the lede” you would have received 800 “+1s” and “THIS!”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL is going to lose her mind when the baby comes. Is she going to empty out and wash the bottles?

OP here. I guess we won’t be finding out, as DH and I left earlier than planned and have agreed that it’s best if we stay in a hotel going forward. We wouldn’t want MIL and FIL to be upset by any mess we might make with a new baby in their house. They can come to us, or perhaps we’ll stay with MIL’s sister, DH’s favorite aunt, who lives close to MIL. She’s a really easygoing hostess.

Thanks all for the perspectives!

So was it more than the water glasses that was causing a problem?

OP here. Yes, everything is so rigid. Everyone expected to sit in a circle and talk at all times, no breaks or even leafing through a magazine. No food outside of sparse, set meals with MIL loudly commenting on portions. No deviating from set plans, even if new opportunities or whims come up. Everything has to be done a certain way, you’re not even allowed to sleep with your door completely closed. We’ve had enough rigidity and have decided that it was one thing to walk on eggshells when it was just us, but we won’t be wasting our energy on that when baby is here.

No problem, they can visit us, or we can stay in a hotel, or we can stay with DH’s aunt who lives near them, and is so warm and accommodating.

So you buried the big picture under the one detail about water glasses. And you're only giving the real and infinitely more meaningful context above, now, many, many pages into this thread. If your communication and ability to identify actual issues are this weak, no wonder you can't cope or use words with MIL like an adult. I'm sure you feel so very aggrieved and right. I would have agreed with you, too--back on page one. But the choice to focus here on the water nonsense instead of telling us about the far larger totality of things is a sympathy-killer for me. Not that you care, of course! You've also now produced for us the wonderful aunt who solves the whole problem!

Why the F post in the first place?! Auntie didn't just materialize, and neither did your issues with MIL. But hey, the water glass anecdote was just too vivid to resist posting as if it were the main event!

Whoa. Are you ok?

+1,000. No one forced PP to read through the entire thread. To attack OP in this way is just bizarre.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At ILs for the weekend (overnight trip). I am five months pregnant. I drink a lot of water generally, but especially now. ILs keep taking any water cup or glass that is not actually in my hand and washing it. I can’t set my water down, use the restroom, and return to where I was sitting and find my water still there. I put a scrunchie around my cup (to indicate it was mine) and kept it in the guest bedroom on a coaster. MIL went into the room without asking, took the cup, left the scrunchie, and washed it.

I asked them to please leave my water cups alone so I could refill, and they said “we don’t keep cups and glasses out.” Finally, I went out to the car and brought in my personalized water bottle from the drive up, washed it out, filled it and kept it in the guest bedroom on a coaster.

Well, MIL went in and took MY WATER BOTTLE and put it in the dishwasher. I got it out, washed it, filled it, and walked into the living room to announce that this is my personal property, I will always use a coaster and will not leave it out, but do not deprive me of my personal water bottle again. MIL and FIL are both peeved. DH asked them to be reasonable, but they are still pouting.

We were supposed to stay two more days, but I’m seriously thinking of packing up and getting TF out of here.

My brother in law is similar. Not this bad, but close. I can’t leave a glass out or he will clean it. Water bottle helped though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL is going to lose her mind when the baby comes. Is she going to empty out and wash the bottles?

OP here. I guess we won’t be finding out, as DH and I left earlier than planned and have agreed that it’s best if we stay in a hotel going forward. We wouldn’t want MIL and FIL to be upset by any mess we might make with a new baby in their house. They can come to us, or perhaps we’ll stay with MIL’s sister, DH’s favorite aunt, who lives close to MIL. She’s a really easygoing hostess.

Thanks all for the perspectives!

So was it more than the water glasses that was causing a problem?

OP here. Yes, everything is so rigid. Everyone expected to sit in a circle and talk at all times, no breaks or even leafing through a magazine. No food outside of sparse, set meals with MIL loudly commenting on portions. No deviating from set plans, even if new opportunities or whims come up. Everything has to be done a certain way, you’re not even allowed to sleep with your door completely closed. We’ve had enough rigidity and have decided that it was one thing to walk on eggshells when it was just us, but we won’t be wasting our energy on that when baby is here.

No problem, they can visit us, or we can stay in a hotel, or we can stay with DH’s aunt who lives near them, and is so warm and accommodating.

Good decision OP. Even my rigid parents loosened up a little when I was older. They don't sound like they will be able to handle the introduction of a baby.

[Anonymous]

Don’t stay with in laws. it’s a bad idea
Adults get their own hotel rooms. I leaned this the hard way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just carry your bottle around the house, to the bathroom, etc. Hide it in your bag in the bedroom.

A few guests are coming over tonight, and I am planning on using a scarf to create a tie around my neck or wrist. I will then happily tell any one who asks, loudly, why I’m doing that. -OP

I understand you're annoyed, but this is ridiculous. Acting like a toddler won't make anything better.

I thought this was a very reasonable response. How else is she supposed to keep the water bottle? She's going to need to attach it to her body. People will ask. She will explain. Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just carry your bottle around the house, to the bathroom, etc. Hide it in your bag in the bedroom.

A few guests are coming over tonight, and I am planning on using a scarf to create a tie around my neck or wrist. I will then happily tell any one who asks, loudly, why I’m doing that. -OP

I understand you're annoyed, but this is ridiculous. Acting like a toddler won't make anything better.

I thought this was a very reasonable response. How else is she supposed to keep the water bottle? She's going to need to attach it to her body. People will ask. She will explain. Problem solved.

I mean, carrying around a water bottle attached to you is silly. Obviously, the solution is a Camelbak.