Gross. My husband doesn't wash his hands... EVER

[Anonymous]

The other night, DH came home from work (he takes the metro) and gave me and DD hugs, as usual. DD happened to be eating dinner at the moment, so he decided to help her and picked up a piece of food from her tray and put it in her mouth. I was pretty grossed out considering he hadn't washed his hands after his 30 minute metro ride during rush hour. I reminded him that he should always wash his hands before he does things like that so that we can avoid germs and sickness as much as possible.

He responded that I was overly cautious, and he NEVER deliberately washes his hands unless they are visibly dirty. He said on an average weekday his hands get wet (1) when he gets ready in the morning, (2) when he rinses off his plate after dinner, and (3) as he gets ready for bed. But what really got me is that he said that he NEVER washes his hands after he goes to the restroom. If he's at work and someone else is in the bathroom, he'll actually go through the trouble of turning on the sink and PRETENDING to wash his hands, but he doesn't actually get them wet. (Unless someone is at the counter too, then he'll actually wash his hands.)

I tried to explain that handwashing is a very important component of personal hygeine, to which he said that he just doesn't like washing his hands and said that everyone is too OCD about it. He thinks I'm over-reacting and doesn't want to talk about it anymore. Anyways, I feel like I must be missing something. Anyone else hate washing their hands and go through great lengths to avoid it? I'm just really, really grossed out and don't understand his perspective at all. Or maybe I AM over-reacting; if so please give me a reality check.

[Anonymous]

Nope. It's gross.

Tell him you are turned off. Hand washers only, in your bed.

[Anonymous]

You only just found this out about him?

[Anonymous]

http://kidshealth.org/parent/general/sick/hand_washing.html

[Anonymous]

Gross. I know people like this.

[Anonymous]

Ewwww.

Can you at least hand him a bottle of Purell?

[Anonymous]

And you are finding this out about your husband *now*? You never noticed before that he is not ever washing his hands, including after using the bathroom? Not when you traveled, not when you had a newborn, not when he is preparing food?
How is this possible?
It's a bit late, but you are right, op, and you shouldn't tolerate it!

[Anonymous]

This is vile and would be grounds for divorce for me. I'm not kidding. He PRETENDS to wash his hands? WTF?

[Anonymous]

This is disgusting in so many levels!!! He touches the faucet that people with SHIT in their hands touched before him and turns it off without washing his hands...

He's not gross, he's an idiot! He's contaminating his hands even more! He's dumb, not gross.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Yes, I'm apparently clueless and have just figured this out 2.5 years into marriage.

I guess it wasn't something that I really thought about before having kids. When DD was a newborn, I made everyone wash their hands before holding her, so I guess it only recently would have become noticeable again.

[Anonymous]

OP again. 13: 05 PP, that's what got me too. He goes to the trouble of PRETENDING to wash his hands! Why not just go ahead and wash them since the water is on?

And to 12:59 PP, he doesn't prepare food (unless it's frozen pizza for his own consumption), which is probably a good thing in light of this discovery. Probably also why I don't see any trend of increased illnesses on my part since we got married.

[Anonymous]

is he a government worker cause this is idiotic

[Anonymous]

I have to admit, I don't wash my hands nearly enough. But not doing it after working all day and then commuting and then putting food in the baby's mouth isn't good.

[Anonymous]

You should pick your nose while he's looking at you and stir his morning oatmeal with your finger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is vile and would be grounds for divorce for me. I'm not kidding. He PRETENDS to wash his hands? WTF?

I so so so sooooooo agree with this. OMG, the part about pretending to wash his hands makes him sound like a psycho. This can't be his only disturbing behavior. And sorry OP, but, WTF is wrong with you that it took you years to
notice this.