Typical SAHM with school aged kids day

[Anonymous]

If I were a day care worker, a chef, a housekeeper, a tutor, a chauffeur etc. I would be worthy. SAHM? Useless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I were a day care worker, a chef, a housekeeper, a tutor, a chauffeur etc. I would be worthy. SAHM? Useless.

Thank you. Now we can just refer to your post when people deny that idiots like you actually exist. Have a great night!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I were a day care worker, a chef, a housekeeper, a tutor, a chauffeur etc. I would be worthy. SAHM? Useless.

The most hateful DCUM posters are much too elitist to think those listed jobs are worthy, but they know they shouldn't say so.

I wish we had log ins if only to see the overlap between the people who are complete jerks on DCUM and the people who complain about having no friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I were a day care worker, a chef, a housekeeper, a tutor, a chauffeur etc. I would be worthy. SAHM? Useless.

The most hateful DCUM posters are much too elitist to think those listed jobs are worthy, but they know they shouldn't say so.

I wish we had log ins if only to see the overlap between the people who are complete jerks on DCUM and the people who complain about having no friends.

+1. In their world, those jobs are for brown people, who are probably illegal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I were a day care worker, a chef, a housekeeper, a tutor, a chauffeur etc. I would be worthy. SAHM? Useless.

Thank you. Now we can just refer to your post when people deny that idiots like you actually exist. Have a great night!

You make no sense. Have a great night too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, i'll play.

For me, it is difficult to have a typical day like I had when I was a WOHM. My work is not very defined because I end up doing/assisting in whatever any of the family members need. I get up at 5:30 am most days, drink my coffee, take a shower and start the day with my daily prayers.

I have two kids in HS now. So, morning goes in making breakfast and lunch and driving them to school or bus-stop. They are in magnet schools so the commute from our house is insanely long. if they miss the bus, I will drive them to school, because the extra time it gives them allows them to eat breakfast or sleep longer or take a nap during the car-ride. Mostly, I drive them to school almost daily, because if one of my kid is late, the other also gets delayed too.

I run my errands on the way back home. Grocery, dry-cleaners, my medical appointments, car wash, car servicing, banking, picking up supplies etc. Once I get home, I make beds in the all the bedrooms, pick up dirty clothes for laundry, vacuum and dust the bedrooms, clean the bathrooms (3 males in the house).

I clean the kitchen counter, start dishes, start laundry and start cooking dinner. Whenever my boys get home, they have a full hot meal to eat, so having dinner ready works for my family. I do a second load of cooking dishes, water the indoor plants, vacuum and mop the kitchen. Fold laundry and put them away in the dressers. Do other cleaning if needed (clean windows, wash sneakers, hats). I am done with the housework and cooking by 11:30 am - noon.

If I have nothing else going on that day (which is rare)- home improvements and repairs, entertaining friends and neighbors, volunteering at school clubs, scheduling appointments for my family, social obligations, shopping, yard-work etc -- I will take a nap for an hour.

After 3:00 pm - my time is dictated by whatever my kids are doing. Pickups and drop-offs from various activities, studying, projects etc. By 6:00 pm, they usually eat dinner and either relax for some time or go to their rooms to study. This goes on till around 11 pm (on a good day. Sometimes they are studying late at night!). DH comes home around 8 pm.

I am fast asleep by 9 pm lol. DH takes out the trash twice a week.

Now, if there are other things going on during the day - then a lot of cleaning will not happen. I will not make the beds and clean the bathrooms and vacuum etc. I will then tackle the laundry at night. If I cannot get the cooking done in the morning, then I will make stuff like pasta, frozen pizza and other frozen food. Or takeouts.

I have a weekly cleaning service and they will clean the whole house and change the bed linens weekly.

So, as you can see, my day is not very structured and I end up doing things as and when needed. I have some free hours in the day-time to pursue my own interests. I used to be stressed when I was working because I did not have the flexibility to do things when it was most convenient. As a SAHM, I do not think I am less busy, but I have a whole lot of flexibility. And when I am unwell, or someone in the family is unwell- I can let things slide with no repercussions.

What I have realized is that I cannot hope for a routine because I am the person who picks up the slack at home. I think it makes things a lot easier and less stressful for the rest of the family.

WOW! A one hour nap during the day and asleep by 9pm at night. I'd kill for that amount of sleep.

Yes, I am very lucky that I can sleep for 8 and a half hours a night. Also, take a one hour nap in the daytime, on many days. For me that is the benefit to me for staying at home. I feel healthier and look younger because of the fact that I get the sleep I need.

I am lucky and I feel blessed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, i'll play.

For me, it is difficult to have a typical day like I had when I was a WOHM. My work is not very defined because I end up doing/assisting in whatever any of the family members need. I get up at 5:30 am most days, drink my coffee, take a shower and start the day with my daily prayers.

I have two kids in HS now. So, morning goes in making breakfast and lunch and driving them to school or bus-stop. They are in magnet schools so the commute from our house is insanely long. if they miss the bus, I will drive them to school, because the extra time it gives them allows them to eat breakfast or sleep longer or take a nap during the car-ride. Mostly, I drive them to school almost daily, because if one of my kid is late, the other also gets delayed too.

I run my errands on the way back home. Grocery, dry-cleaners, my medical appointments, car wash, car servicing, banking, picking up supplies etc. Once I get home, I make beds in the all the bedrooms, pick up dirty clothes for laundry, vacuum and dust the bedrooms, clean the bathrooms (3 males in the house).

I clean the kitchen counter, start dishes, start laundry and start cooking dinner. Whenever my boys get home, they have a full hot meal to eat, so having dinner ready works for my family. I do a second load of cooking dishes, water the indoor plants, vacuum and mop the kitchen. Fold laundry and put them away in the dressers. Do other cleaning if needed (clean windows, wash sneakers, hats). I am done with the housework and cooking by 11:30 am - noon.

If I have nothing else going on that day (which is rare)- home improvements and repairs, entertaining friends and neighbors, volunteering at school clubs, scheduling appointments for my family, social obligations, shopping, yard-work etc -- I will take a nap for an hour.

After 3:00 pm - my time is dictated by whatever my kids are doing. Pickups and drop-offs from various activities, studying, projects etc. By 6:00 pm, they usually eat dinner and either relax for some time or go to their rooms to study. This goes on till around 11 pm (on a good day. Sometimes they are studying late at night!). DH comes home around 8 pm.

I am fast asleep by 9 pm lol. DH takes out the trash twice a week.

Now, if there are other things going on during the day - then a lot of cleaning will not happen. I will not make the beds and clean the bathrooms and vacuum etc. I will then tackle the laundry at night. If I cannot get the cooking done in the morning, then I will make stuff like pasta, frozen pizza and other frozen food. Or takeouts.

I have a weekly cleaning service and they will clean the whole house and change the bed linens weekly.

So, as you can see, my day is not very structured and I end up doing things as and when needed. I have some free hours in the day-time to pursue my own interests. I used to be stressed when I was working because I did not have the flexibility to do things when it was most convenient. As a SAHM, I do not think I am less busy, but I have a whole lot of flexibility. And when I am unwell, or someone in the family is unwell- I can let things slide with no repercussions.

What I have realized is that I cannot hope for a routine because I am the person who picks up the slack at home. I think it makes things a lot easier and less stressful for the rest of the family.

Really not trying to be snarky but why are you picking up your high schoolers' dirty clothes & making their beds? Regardless of whether or not their mom (or dad or nanny or housekeeper...) is home during the day, kids need to get into the habit of picking up after themselves well before they go off to college, IMO. It makes sense that the person whose job -- paid or unpaid --is to take care of the house/keep the home running smoothly takes care of the major cleaning tasks, laundry,grocery shopping, cooking,etc while everyone else is at school/work but there are some basic tasks that all kids should do for themselves, regardless of who is or isn't home during the day.

Actually, you are being snarky. How I raise my kids is nobody's business. However, let me answer you. Since my kids are putting in hours of work studying, volunteering and doing EC work, participating in competitions and travelling during the weekends, because of being in a highly competitive magnet program, and are barely getting 5-6 hours of sleep at night, I want to make life as easy for them regarding chores that I can do. If it buys them some more leisure time, I am glad to do this.

Now, hopefully, learning how to launder their clothes will not be difficult for a student, who can write complex computer programs and has been interning during summer in the prestigious STEM field.

I know that many households where both parents are WOHPs, the laundry and cleaning gets done on the weekends only. That is also a choice. When my kids will need to launder clothes, hopefully, they too can do it on a weekend, or when they have the time, or outsource it, or find another solution. These are smart kids. They will figure it out.

Right now, I am hoping they remain focused on giving their all to their academics and other interests - so they can have a successful and fulfilling career later on in life. I am thankful that I am here to support them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, i'll play.

For me, it is difficult to have a typical day like I had when I was a WOHM. My work is not very defined because I end up doing/assisting in whatever any of the family members need. I get up at 5:30 am most days, drink my coffee, take a shower and start the day with my daily prayers.

I have two kids in HS now. So, morning goes in making breakfast and lunch and driving them to school or bus-stop. They are in magnet schools so the commute from our house is insanely long. if they miss the bus, I will drive them to school, because the extra time it gives them allows them to eat breakfast or sleep longer or take a nap during the car-ride. Mostly, I drive them to school almost daily, because if one of my kid is late, the other also gets delayed too.

I run my errands on the way back home. Grocery, dry-cleaners, my medical appointments, car wash, car servicing, banking, picking up supplies etc. Once I get home, I make beds in the all the bedrooms, pick up dirty clothes for laundry, vacuum and dust the bedrooms, clean the bathrooms (3 males in the house).

I clean the kitchen counter, start dishes, start laundry and start cooking dinner. Whenever my boys get home, they have a full hot meal to eat, so having dinner ready works for my family. I do a second load of cooking dishes, water the indoor plants, vacuum and mop the kitchen. Fold laundry and put them away in the dressers. Do other cleaning if needed (clean windows, wash sneakers, hats). I am done with the housework and cooking by 11:30 am - noon.

If I have nothing else going on that day (which is rare)- home improvements and repairs, entertaining friends and neighbors, volunteering at school clubs, scheduling appointments for my family, social obligations, shopping, yard-work etc -- I will take a nap for an hour.

After 3:00 pm - my time is dictated by whatever my kids are doing. Pickups and drop-offs from various activities, studying, projects etc. By 6:00 pm, they usually eat dinner and either relax for some time or go to their rooms to study. This goes on till around 11 pm (on a good day. Sometimes they are studying late at night!). DH comes home around 8 pm.

I am fast asleep by 9 pm lol. DH takes out the trash twice a week.

Now, if there are other things going on during the day - then a lot of cleaning will not happen. I will not make the beds and clean the bathrooms and vacuum etc. I will then tackle the laundry at night. If I cannot get the cooking done in the morning, then I will make stuff like pasta, frozen pizza and other frozen food. Or takeouts.

I have a weekly cleaning service and they will clean the whole house and change the bed linens weekly.

So, as you can see, my day is not very structured and I end up doing things as and when needed. I have some free hours in the day-time to pursue my own interests. I used to be stressed when I was working because I did not have the flexibility to do things when it was most convenient. As a SAHM, I do not think I am less busy, but I have a whole lot of flexibility. And when I am unwell, or someone in the family is unwell- I can let things slide with no repercussions.

What I have realized is that I cannot hope for a routine because I am the person who picks up the slack at home. I think it makes things a lot easier and less stressful for the rest of the family.

Really not trying to be snarky but why are you picking up your high schoolers' dirty clothes & making their beds? Regardless of whether or not their mom (or dad or nanny or housekeeper...) is home during the day, kids need to get into the habit of picking up after themselves well before they go off to college, IMO. It makes sense that the person whose job -- paid or unpaid --is to take care of the house/keep the home running smoothly takes care of the major cleaning tasks, laundry,grocery shopping, cooking,etc while everyone else is at school/work but there are some basic tasks that all kids should do for themselves, regardless of who is or isn't home during the day.

I'm a SAHM, but I don't really understand this either. My kids are 7 and 4, and they both are responsible for putting their own dirty clothes into the hamper and for making their own beds. Most days I don't even have to remind them.

Wow, its so amazing that you and I are so different, even though we both are SAHMs. Also, its amazing that we are at different stages of parenting. Your kids are in ES and mine is in HS, so maybe our circumstances are different? And maybe because of the things my children are doing outside of school is time consuming enough that they have different priorities that the average HS students? It surely boggles the mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, i'll play.

For me, it is difficult to have a typical day like I had when I was a WOHM. My work is not very defined because I end up doing/assisting in whatever any of the family members need. I get up at 5:30 am most days, drink my coffee, take a shower and start the day with my daily prayers.

I have two kids in HS now. So, morning goes in making breakfast and lunch and driving them to school or bus-stop. They are in magnet schools so the commute from our house is insanely long. if they miss the bus, I will drive them to school, because the extra time it gives them allows them to eat breakfast or sleep longer or take a nap during the car-ride. Mostly, I drive them to school almost daily, because if one of my kid is late, the other also gets delayed too.

I run my errands on the way back home. Grocery, dry-cleaners, my medical appointments, car wash, car servicing, banking, picking up supplies etc. Once I get home, I make beds in the all the bedrooms, pick up dirty clothes for laundry, vacuum and dust the bedrooms, clean the bathrooms (3 males in the house).

I clean the kitchen counter, start dishes, start laundry and start cooking dinner. Whenever my boys get home, they have a full hot meal to eat, so having dinner ready works for my family. I do a second load of cooking dishes, water the indoor plants, vacuum and mop the kitchen. Fold laundry and put them away in the dressers. Do other cleaning if needed (clean windows, wash sneakers, hats). I am done with the housework and cooking by 11:30 am - noon.

If I have nothing else going on that day (which is rare)- home improvements and repairs, entertaining friends and neighbors, volunteering at school clubs, scheduling appointments for my family, social obligations, shopping, yard-work etc -- I will take a nap for an hour.

After 3:00 pm - my time is dictated by whatever my kids are doing. Pickups and drop-offs from various activities, studying, projects etc. By 6:00 pm, they usually eat dinner and either relax for some time or go to their rooms to study. This goes on till around 11 pm (on a good day. Sometimes they are studying late at night!). DH comes home around 8 pm.

I am fast asleep by 9 pm lol. DH takes out the trash twice a week.

Now, if there are other things going on during the day - then a lot of cleaning will not happen. I will not make the beds and clean the bathrooms and vacuum etc. I will then tackle the laundry at night. If I cannot get the cooking done in the morning, then I will make stuff like pasta, frozen pizza and other frozen food. Or takeouts.

I have a weekly cleaning service and they will clean the whole house and change the bed linens weekly.

So, as you can see, my day is not very structured and I end up doing things as and when needed. I have some free hours in the day-time to pursue my own interests. I used to be stressed when I was working because I did not have the flexibility to do things when it was most convenient. As a SAHM, I do not think I am less busy, but I have a whole lot of flexibility. And when I am unwell, or someone in the family is unwell- I can let things slide with no repercussions.

What I have realized is that I cannot hope for a routine because I am the person who picks up the slack at home. I think it makes things a lot easier and less stressful for the rest of the family.

Really not trying to be snarky but why are you picking up your high schoolers' dirty clothes & making their beds? Regardless of whether or not their mom (or dad or nanny or housekeeper...) is home during the day, kids need to get into the habit of picking up after themselves well before they go off to college, IMO. It makes sense that the person whose job -- paid or unpaid --is to take care of the house/keep the home running smoothly takes care of the major cleaning tasks, laundry,grocery shopping, cooking,etc while everyone else is at school/work but there are some basic tasks that all kids should do for themselves, regardless of who is or isn't home during the day.

Actually, you are being snarky. How I raise my kids is nobody's business. However, let me answer you. Since my kids are putting in hours of work studying, volunteering and doing EC work, participating in competitions and travelling during the weekends, because of being in a highly competitive magnet program, and are barely getting 5-6 hours of sleep at night, I want to make life as easy for them regarding chores that I can do. If it buys them some more leisure time, I am glad to do this.

Now, hopefully, learning how to launder their clothes will not be difficult for a student, who can write complex computer programs and has been interning during summer in the prestigious STEM field.

I know that many households where both parents are WOHPs, the laundry and cleaning gets done on the weekends only. That is also a choice. When my kids will need to launder clothes, hopefully, they too can do it on a weekend, or when they have the time, or outsource it, or find another solution. These are smart kids. They will figure it out.

Right now, I am hoping they remain focused on giving their all to their academics and other interests - so they can have a successful and fulfilling career later on in life. I am thankful that I am here to support them.

Good luck to their future college roommates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, i'll play.

For me, it is difficult to have a typical day like I had when I was a WOHM. My work is not very defined because I end up doing/assisting in whatever any of the family members need. I get up at 5:30 am most days, drink my coffee, take a shower and start the day with my daily prayers.

I have two kids in HS now. So, morning goes in making breakfast and lunch and driving them to school or bus-stop. They are in magnet schools so the commute from our house is insanely long. if they miss the bus, I will drive them to school, because the extra time it gives them allows them to eat breakfast or sleep longer or take a nap during the car-ride. Mostly, I drive them to school almost daily, because if one of my kid is late, the other also gets delayed too.

I run my errands on the way back home. Grocery, dry-cleaners, my medical appointments, car wash, car servicing, banking, picking up supplies etc. Once I get home, I make beds in the all the bedrooms, pick up dirty clothes for laundry, vacuum and dust the bedrooms, clean the bathrooms (3 males in the house).

I clean the kitchen counter, start dishes, start laundry and start cooking dinner. Whenever my boys get home, they have a full hot meal to eat, so having dinner ready works for my family. I do a second load of cooking dishes, water the indoor plants, vacuum and mop the kitchen. Fold laundry and put them away in the dressers. Do other cleaning if needed (clean windows, wash sneakers, hats). I am done with the housework and cooking by 11:30 am - noon.

If I have nothing else going on that day (which is rare)- home improvements and repairs, entertaining friends and neighbors, volunteering at school clubs, scheduling appointments for my family, social obligations, shopping, yard-work etc -- I will take a nap for an hour.

After 3:00 pm - my time is dictated by whatever my kids are doing. Pickups and drop-offs from various activities, studying, projects etc. By 6:00 pm, they usually eat dinner and either relax for some time or go to their rooms to study. This goes on till around 11 pm (on a good day. Sometimes they are studying late at night!). DH comes home around 8 pm.

I am fast asleep by 9 pm lol. DH takes out the trash twice a week.

Now, if there are other things going on during the day - then a lot of cleaning will not happen. I will not make the beds and clean the bathrooms and vacuum etc. I will then tackle the laundry at night. If I cannot get the cooking done in the morning, then I will make stuff like pasta, frozen pizza and other frozen food. Or takeouts.

I have a weekly cleaning service and they will clean the whole house and change the bed linens weekly.

So, as you can see, my day is not very structured and I end up doing things as and when needed. I have some free hours in the day-time to pursue my own interests. I used to be stressed when I was working because I did not have the flexibility to do things when it was most convenient. As a SAHM, I do not think I am less busy, but I have a whole lot of flexibility. And when I am unwell, or someone in the family is unwell- I can let things slide with no repercussions.

What I have realized is that I cannot hope for a routine because I am the person who picks up the slack at home. I think it makes things a lot easier and less stressful for the rest of the family.

Really not trying to be snarky but why are you picking up your high schoolers' dirty clothes & making their beds? Regardless of whether or not their mom (or dad or nanny or housekeeper...) is home during the day, kids need to get into the habit of picking up after themselves well before they go off to college, IMO. It makes sense that the person whose job -- paid or unpaid --is to take care of the house/keep the home running smoothly takes care of the major cleaning tasks, laundry,grocery shopping, cooking,etc while everyone else is at school/work but there are some basic tasks that all kids should do for themselves, regardless of who is or isn't home during the day.

Actually, you are being snarky. How I raise my kids is nobody's business. However, let me answer you. Since my kids are putting in hours of work studying, volunteering and doing EC work, participating in competitions and travelling during the weekends, because of being in a highly competitive magnet program, and are barely getting 5-6 hours of sleep at night, I want to make life as easy for them regarding chores that I can do. If it buys them some more leisure time, I am glad to do this.

Now, hopefully, learning how to launder their clothes will not be difficult for a student, who can write complex computer programs and has been interning during summer in the prestigious STEM field.

I know that many households where both parents are WOHPs, the laundry and cleaning gets done on the weekends only. That is also a choice. When my kids will need to launder clothes, hopefully, they too can do it on a weekend, or when they have the time, or outsource it, or find another solution. These are smart kids. They will figure it out.

Right now, I am hoping they remain focused on giving their all to their academics and other interests - so they can have a successful and fulfilling career later on in life. I am thankful that I am here to support them.



[

I don't care how brilliant they are, college students/young adults who are not used to cleaning up after themselves at home are quite often difficult to live with in that respect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, i'll play.

For me, it is difficult to have a typical day like I had when I was a WOHM. My work is not very defined because I end up doing/assisting in whatever any of the family members need. I get up at 5:30 am most days, drink my coffee, take a shower and start the day with my daily prayers.

I have two kids in HS now. So, morning goes in making breakfast and lunch and driving them to school or bus-stop. They are in magnet schools so the commute from our house is insanely long. if they miss the bus, I will drive them to school, because the extra time it gives them allows them to eat breakfast or sleep longer or take a nap during the car-ride. Mostly, I drive them to school almost daily, because if one of my kid is late, the other also gets delayed too.

I run my errands on the way back home. Grocery, dry-cleaners, my medical appointments, car wash, car servicing, banking, picking up supplies etc. Once I get home, I make beds in the all the bedrooms, pick up dirty clothes for laundry, vacuum and dust the bedrooms, clean the bathrooms (3 males in the house).

I clean the kitchen counter, start dishes, start laundry and start cooking dinner. Whenever my boys get home, they have a full hot meal to eat, so having dinner ready works for my family. I do a second load of cooking dishes, water the indoor plants, vacuum and mop the kitchen. Fold laundry and put them away in the dressers. Do other cleaning if needed (clean windows, wash sneakers, hats). I am done with the housework and cooking by 11:30 am - noon.

If I have nothing else going on that day (which is rare)- home improvements and repairs, entertaining friends and neighbors, volunteering at school clubs, scheduling appointments for my family, social obligations, shopping, yard-work etc -- I will take a nap for an hour.

After 3:00 pm - my time is dictated by whatever my kids are doing. Pickups and drop-offs from various activities, studying, projects etc. By 6:00 pm, they usually eat dinner and either relax for some time or go to their rooms to study. This goes on till around 11 pm (on a good day. Sometimes they are studying late at night!). DH comes home around 8 pm.

I am fast asleep by 9 pm lol. DH takes out the trash twice a week.

Now, if there are other things going on during the day - then a lot of cleaning will not happen. I will not make the beds and clean the bathrooms and vacuum etc. I will then tackle the laundry at night. If I cannot get the cooking done in the morning, then I will make stuff like pasta, frozen pizza and other frozen food. Or takeouts.

I have a weekly cleaning service and they will clean the whole house and change the bed linens weekly.

So, as you can see, my day is not very structured and I end up doing things as and when needed. I have some free hours in the day-time to pursue my own interests. I used to be stressed when I was working because I did not have the flexibility to do things when it was most convenient. As a SAHM, I do not think I am less busy, but I have a whole lot of flexibility. And when I am unwell, or someone in the family is unwell- I can let things slide with no repercussions.

What I have realized is that I cannot hope for a routine because I am the person who picks up the slack at home. I think it makes things a lot easier and less stressful for the rest of the family.

Really not trying to be snarky but why are you picking up your high schoolers' dirty clothes & making their beds? Regardless of whether or not their mom (or dad or nanny or housekeeper...) is home during the day, kids need to get into the habit of picking up after themselves well before they go off to college, IMO. It makes sense that the person whose job -- paid or unpaid --is to take care of the house/keep the home running smoothly takes care of the major cleaning tasks, laundry,grocery shopping, cooking,etc while everyone else is at school/work but there are some basic tasks that all kids should do for themselves, regardless of who is or isn't home during the day.

Actually, you are being snarky. How I raise my kids is nobody's business. However, let me answer you. Since my kids are putting in hours of work studying, volunteering and doing EC work, participating in competitions and travelling during the weekends, because of being in a highly competitive magnet program, and are barely getting 5-6 hours of sleep at night, I want to make life as easy for them regarding chores that I can do. If it buys them some more leisure time, I am glad to do this.

Now, hopefully, learning how to launder their clothes will not be difficult for a student, who can write complex computer programs and has been interning during summer in the prestigious STEM field.

I know that many households where both parents are WOHPs, the laundry and cleaning gets done on the weekends only. That is also a choice. When my kids will need to launder clothes, hopefully, they too can do it on a weekend, or when they have the time, or outsource it, or find another solution. These are smart kids. They will figure it out.

Right now, I am hoping they remain focused on giving their all to their academics and other interests - so they can have a successful and fulfilling career later on in life. I am thankful that I am here to support them.

Good luck to their future college roommates.

+1

I have a friend who has absolutely coddled her son. To the point where dad was practically doing his homework for him and he is an honors student of course! Tutors and extra coaching for everything. He had a sat/act "buddy" who went to the tests with him and walked him through everything up to the test and waited for him after to counsel him. He got fast food of his choice brought to him daily even though he has a car. He has never cooked, cleaned or shopped for himself. Now all of a sudden they have decided to prep him for college and the entire family is stressed out. His grades are tanking. And he is throwing toddler like tantrums because of all the stress put on him at once. Its a sad sad trainwreck to watch.

She is hoping they can convince him to go to college close so she can help him with cleaning and laundry and dad can be there for homework and car maintenance etc. So its not like they are learning lesson here either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, i'll play.

For me, it is difficult to have a typical day like I had when I was a WOHM. My work is not very defined because I end up doing/assisting in whatever any of the family members need. I get up at 5:30 am most days, drink my coffee, take a shower and start the day with my daily prayers.

I have two kids in HS now. So, morning goes in making breakfast and lunch and driving them to school or bus-stop. They are in magnet schools so the commute from our house is insanely long. if they miss the bus, I will drive them to school, because the extra time it gives them allows them to eat breakfast or sleep longer or take a nap during the car-ride. Mostly, I drive them to school almost daily, because if one of my kid is late, the other also gets delayed too.

I run my errands on the way back home. Grocery, dry-cleaners, my medical appointments, car wash, car servicing, banking, picking up supplies etc. Once I get home, I make beds in the all the bedrooms, pick up dirty clothes for laundry, vacuum and dust the bedrooms, clean the bathrooms (3 males in the house).

I clean the kitchen counter, start dishes, start laundry and start cooking dinner. Whenever my boys get home, they have a full hot meal to eat, so having dinner ready works for my family. I do a second load of cooking dishes, water the indoor plants, vacuum and mop the kitchen. Fold laundry and put them away in the dressers. Do other cleaning if needed (clean windows, wash sneakers, hats). I am done with the housework and cooking by 11:30 am - noon.

If I have nothing else going on that day (which is rare)- home improvements and repairs, entertaining friends and neighbors, volunteering at school clubs, scheduling appointments for my family, social obligations, shopping, yard-work etc -- I will take a nap for an hour.

After 3:00 pm - my time is dictated by whatever my kids are doing. Pickups and drop-offs from various activities, studying, projects etc. By 6:00 pm, they usually eat dinner and either relax for some time or go to their rooms to study. This goes on till around 11 pm (on a good day. Sometimes they are studying late at night!). DH comes home around 8 pm.

I am fast asleep by 9 pm lol. DH takes out the trash twice a week.

Now, if there are other things going on during the day - then a lot of cleaning will not happen. I will not make the beds and clean the bathrooms and vacuum etc. I will then tackle the laundry at night. If I cannot get the cooking done in the morning, then I will make stuff like pasta, frozen pizza and other frozen food. Or takeouts.

I have a weekly cleaning service and they will clean the whole house and change the bed linens weekly.

So, as you can see, my day is not very structured and I end up doing things as and when needed. I have some free hours in the day-time to pursue my own interests. I used to be stressed when I was working because I did not have the flexibility to do things when it was most convenient. As a SAHM, I do not think I am less busy, but I have a whole lot of flexibility. And when I am unwell, or someone in the family is unwell- I can let things slide with no repercussions.

What I have realized is that I cannot hope for a routine because I am the person who picks up the slack at home. I think it makes things a lot easier and less stressful for the rest of the family.

WOW! A one hour nap during the day and asleep by 9pm at night. I'd kill for that amount of sleep.

Wait-her husband gets home at 8pm and she goes to sleep at 9pm (after a 1 hour nap during the day). This sounds like depression. When do they ever have sex??

LOL! Curious minds want to know...don't they? DH has been on vacay, this whole week, so we have been sleeping late and having sex before sleeping, but, usually, it is very early mornings. We have a very active and adventurous sex life and like to have sex at least 4-5 times a week.

DH is very high energy person and does not require a whole lot of sleep, but I feel that if I do not get enough sleep, my libido is not that great. So, a nap and enough sleep, keeps me physically and mentally happy, and eager for sex.

BTW, I am curious that there must be WOHM, who have similar sleep needs as me (a good 9 -10 hours), and if they are not getting enough sleep during the week, are they truly looking forward to sex?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, i'll play.

For me, it is difficult to have a typical day like I had when I was a WOHM. My work is not very defined because I end up doing/assisting in whatever any of the family members need. I get up at 5:30 am most days, drink my coffee, take a shower and start the day with my daily prayers.

I have two kids in HS now. So, morning goes in making breakfast and lunch and driving them to school or bus-stop. They are in magnet schools so the commute from our house is insanely long. if they miss the bus, I will drive them to school, because the extra time it gives them allows them to eat breakfast or sleep longer or take a nap during the car-ride. Mostly, I drive them to school almost daily, because if one of my kid is late, the other also gets delayed too.

I run my errands on the way back home. Grocery, dry-cleaners, my medical appointments, car wash, car servicing, banking, picking up supplies etc. Once I get home, I make beds in the all the bedrooms, pick up dirty clothes for laundry, vacuum and dust the bedrooms, clean the bathrooms (3 males in the house).

I clean the kitchen counter, start dishes, start laundry and start cooking dinner. Whenever my boys get home, they have a full hot meal to eat, so having dinner ready works for my family. I do a second load of cooking dishes, water the indoor plants, vacuum and mop the kitchen. Fold laundry and put them away in the dressers. Do other cleaning if needed (clean windows, wash sneakers, hats). I am done with the housework and cooking by 11:30 am - noon.

If I have nothing else going on that day (which is rare)- home improvements and repairs, entertaining friends and neighbors, volunteering at school clubs, scheduling appointments for my family, social obligations, shopping, yard-work etc -- I will take a nap for an hour.

After 3:00 pm - my time is dictated by whatever my kids are doing. Pickups and drop-offs from various activities, studying, projects etc. By 6:00 pm, they usually eat dinner and either relax for some time or go to their rooms to study. This goes on till around 11 pm (on a good day. Sometimes they are studying late at night!). DH comes home around 8 pm.

I am fast asleep by 9 pm lol. DH takes out the trash twice a week.

Now, if there are other things going on during the day - then a lot of cleaning will not happen. I will not make the beds and clean the bathrooms and vacuum etc. I will then tackle the laundry at night. If I cannot get the cooking done in the morning, then I will make stuff like pasta, frozen pizza and other frozen food. Or takeouts.

I have a weekly cleaning service and they will clean the whole house and change the bed linens weekly.

So, as you can see, my day is not very structured and I end up doing things as and when needed. I have some free hours in the day-time to pursue my own interests. I used to be stressed when I was working because I did not have the flexibility to do things when it was most convenient. As a SAHM, I do not think I am less busy, but I have a whole lot of flexibility. And when I am unwell, or someone in the family is unwell- I can let things slide with no repercussions.

What I have realized is that I cannot hope for a routine because I am the person who picks up the slack at home. I think it makes things a lot easier and less stressful for the rest of the family.

Really not trying to be snarky but why are you picking up your high schoolers' dirty clothes & making their beds? Regardless of whether or not their mom (or dad or nanny or housekeeper...) is home during the day, kids need to get into the habit of picking up after themselves well before they go off to college, IMO. It makes sense that the person whose job -- paid or unpaid --is to take care of the house/keep the home running smoothly takes care of the major cleaning tasks, laundry,grocery shopping, cooking,etc while everyone else is at school/work but there are some basic tasks that all kids should do for themselves, regardless of who is or isn't home during the day.

Actually, you are being snarky. How I raise my kids is nobody's business. However, let me answer you. Since my kids are putting in hours of work studying, volunteering and doing EC work, participating in competitions and travelling during the weekends, because of being in a highly competitive magnet program, and are barely getting 5-6 hours of sleep at night, I want to make life as easy for them regarding chores that I can do. If it buys them some more leisure time, I am glad to do this.

Now, hopefully, learning how to launder their clothes will not be difficult for a student, who can write complex computer programs and has been interning during summer in the prestigious STEM field.

I know that many households where both parents are WOHPs, the laundry and cleaning gets done on the weekends only. That is also a choice. When my kids will need to launder clothes, hopefully, they too can do it on a weekend, or when they have the time, or outsource it, or find another solution. These are smart kids. They will figure it out.

Right now, I am hoping they remain focused on giving their all to their academics and other interests - so they can have a successful and fulfilling career later on in life. I am thankful that I am here to support them.

Good luck to their future college roommates.

+1

I have a friend who has absolutely coddled her son. To the point where dad was practically doing his homework for him and he is an honors student of course! Tutors and extra coaching for everything. He had a sat/act "buddy" who went to the tests with him and walked him through everything up to the test and waited for him after to counsel him. He got fast food of his choice brought to him daily even though he has a car. He has never cooked, cleaned or shopped for himself. Now all of a sudden they have decided to prep him for college and the entire family is stressed out. His grades are tanking. And he is throwing toddler like tantrums because of all the stress put on him at once. Its a sad sad trainwreck to watch.

She is hoping they can convince him to go to college close so she can help him with cleaning and laundry and dad can be there for homework and car maintenance etc. So its not like they are learning lesson here either.

Well, you are projecting your own insecurities here. Sorry to hear that people you know are the kind who are pressuring their kids to prep and do well. I am lucky that my kids are self motivated and high achievers without any help from our side. Actually, people in my circle do not seem to be the trainwrecks that your friends seem to be. My SAHM and WOHM friends are parents of highly gifted kids, and these kids are curious and brilliant without pressure from parents.

So, I am to understand from all the feedback here that the DHs of all the WOHMs on this thread are people who are doing laundry, cleaning the house, doing dishes and cooking and doing everything else? Because obviously they did not have a mother like me who coddled them? Well, then the fact that all of you WOHM successfully should not be a big deal, because your DHs are doing everything. Your household is pretty much running by itself. So, what is so great that you go to work every day? You do not do any work that SAHMs do. Your kids and husband do everything. Your life is easy.

Now, if there was anyway you could sleep more, you would be golden.

Oh, I hope if schools are closed on Friday because of snow, your office have generous leave policy. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

+1

I have a friend who has absolutely coddled her son. To the point where dad was practically doing his homework for him and he is an honors student of course! Tutors and extra coaching for everything. He had a sat/act "buddy" who went to the tests with him and walked him through everything up to the test and waited for him after to counsel him. He got fast food of his choice brought to him daily even though he has a car. He has never cooked, cleaned or shopped for himself. Now all of a sudden they have decided to prep him for college and the entire family is stressed out. His grades are tanking. And he is throwing toddler like tantrums because of all the stress put on him at once. Its a sad sad trainwreck to watch.

She is hoping they can convince him to go to college close so she can help him with cleaning and laundry and dad can be there for homework and car maintenance etc. So its not like they are learning lesson here either.

Well, you are projecting your own insecurities here. Sorry to hear that people you know are the kind who are pressuring their kids to prep and do well. I am lucky that my kids are self motivated and high achievers without any help from our side. Actually, people in my circle do not seem to be the trainwrecks that your friends seem to be. My SAHM and WOHM friends are parents of highly gifted kids, and these kids are curious and brilliant without pressure from parents.

So, I am to understand from all the feedback here that the DHs of all the WOHMs on this thread are people who are doing laundry, cleaning the house, doing dishes and cooking and doing everything else? Because obviously they did not have a mother like me who coddled them? Well, then the fact that all of you WOHM successfully should not be a big deal, because your DHs are doing everything. Your household is pretty much running by itself. So, what is so great that you go to work every day? You do not do any work that SAHMs do. Your kids and husband do everything. Your life is easy.

Now, if there was anyway you could sleep more, you would be golden.

Oh, I hope if schools are closed on Friday because of snow, your office have generous leave policy. Good luck!

Oh please do tell me what insecurities I am projecting here?

Did you even read what I wrote? They haven't prepped either or their sons at all. Now they are trying to cram a lifetime into 6 months.

FYI I am a SAHM and this friend of mine is an oddity in my circle of friends. I sleep just fine thanks I wonder though does your smugginess ever keep you awake?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, i'll play.

For me, it is difficult to have a typical day like I had when I was a WOHM. My work is not very defined because I end up doing/assisting in whatever any of the family members need. I get up at 5:30 am most days, drink my coffee, take a shower and start the day with my daily prayers.

I have two kids in HS now. So, morning goes in making breakfast and lunch and driving them to school or bus-stop. They are in magnet schools so the commute from our house is insanely long. if they miss the bus, I will drive them to school, because the extra time it gives them allows them to eat breakfast or sleep longer or take a nap during the car-ride. Mostly, I drive them to school almost daily, because if one of my kid is late, the other also gets delayed too.

I run my errands on the way back home. Grocery, dry-cleaners, my medical appointments, car wash, car servicing, banking, picking up supplies etc. Once I get home, I make beds in the all the bedrooms, pick up dirty clothes for laundry, vacuum and dust the bedrooms, clean the bathrooms (3 males in the house).

I clean the kitchen counter, start dishes, start laundry and start cooking dinner. Whenever my boys get home, they have a full hot meal to eat, so having dinner ready works for my family. I do a second load of cooking dishes, water the indoor plants, vacuum and mop the kitchen. Fold laundry and put them away in the dressers. Do other cleaning if needed (clean windows, wash sneakers, hats). I am done with the housework and cooking by 11:30 am - noon.

If I have nothing else going on that day (which is rare)- home improvements and repairs, entertaining friends and neighbors, volunteering at school clubs, scheduling appointments for my family, social obligations, shopping, yard-work etc -- I will take a nap for an hour.

After 3:00 pm - my time is dictated by whatever my kids are doing. Pickups and drop-offs from various activities, studying, projects etc. By 6:00 pm, they usually eat dinner and either relax for some time or go to their rooms to study. This goes on till around 11 pm (on a good day. Sometimes they are studying late at night!). DH comes home around 8 pm.

I am fast asleep by 9 pm lol. DH takes out the trash twice a week.

Now, if there are other things going on during the day - then a lot of cleaning will not happen. I will not make the beds and clean the bathrooms and vacuum etc. I will then tackle the laundry at night. If I cannot get the cooking done in the morning, then I will make stuff like pasta, frozen pizza and other frozen food. Or takeouts.

I have a weekly cleaning service and they will clean the whole house and change the bed linens weekly.

So, as you can see, my day is not very structured and I end up doing things as and when needed. I have some free hours in the day-time to pursue my own interests. I used to be stressed when I was working because I did not have the flexibility to do things when it was most convenient. As a SAHM, I do not think I am less busy, but I have a whole lot of flexibility. And when I am unwell, or someone in the family is unwell- I can let things slide with no repercussions.

What I have realized is that I cannot hope for a routine because I am the person who picks up the slack at home. I think it makes things a lot easier and less stressful for the rest of the family.

Really not trying to be snarky but why are you picking up your high schoolers' dirty clothes & making their beds? Regardless of whether or not their mom (or dad or nanny or housekeeper...) is home during the day, kids need to get into the habit of picking up after themselves well before they go off to college, IMO. It makes sense that the person whose job -- paid or unpaid --is to take care of the house/keep the home running smoothly takes care of the major cleaning tasks, laundry,grocery shopping, cooking,etc while everyone else is at school/work but there are some basic tasks that all kids should do for themselves, regardless of who is or isn't home during the day.

Actually, you are being snarky. How I raise my kids is nobody's business. However, let me answer you. Since my kids are putting in hours of work studying, volunteering and doing EC work, participating in competitions and travelling during the weekends, because of being in a highly competitive magnet program, and are barely getting 5-6 hours of sleep at night, I want to make life as easy for them regarding chores that I can do. If it buys them some more leisure time, I am glad to do this.

Now, hopefully, learning how to launder their clothes will not be difficult for a student, who can write complex computer programs and has been interning during summer in the prestigious STEM field.

I know that many households where both parents are WOHPs, the laundry and cleaning gets done on the weekends only. That is also a choice. When my kids will need to launder clothes, hopefully, they too can do it on a weekend, or when they have the time, or outsource it, or find another solution. These are smart kids. They will figure it out.

Right now, I am hoping they remain focused on giving their all to their academics and other interests - so they can have a successful and fulfilling career later on in life. I am thankful that I am here to support them.

Good luck to their future college roommates.

+1

I have a friend who has absolutely coddled her son. To the point where dad was practically doing his homework for him and he is an honors student of course! Tutors and extra coaching for everything. He had a sat/act "buddy" who went to the tests with him and walked him through everything up to the test and waited for him after to counsel him. He got fast food of his choice brought to him daily even though he has a car. He has never cooked, cleaned or shopped for himself. Now all of a sudden they have decided to prep him for college and the entire family is stressed out. His grades are tanking. And he is throwing toddler like tantrums because of all the stress put on him at once. Its a sad sad trainwreck to watch.

She is hoping they can convince him to go to college close so she can help him with cleaning and laundry and dad can be there for homework and car maintenance etc. So its not like they are learning lesson here either.

Well, you are projecting your own insecurities here. Sorry to hear that people you know are the kind who are pressuring their kids to prep and do well. I am lucky that my kids are self motivated and high achievers without any help from our side. Actually, people in my circle do not seem to be the trainwrecks that your friends seem to be. My SAHM and WOHM friends are parents of highly gifted kids, and these kids are curious and brilliant without pressure from parents.

So, I am to understand from all the feedback here that the DHs of all the WOHMs on this thread are people who are doing laundry, cleaning the house, doing dishes and cooking and doing everything else? Because obviously they did not have a mother like me who coddled them? Well, then the fact that all of you WOHM successfully should not be a big deal, because your DHs are doing everything. Your household is pretty much running by itself. So, what is so great that you go to work every day? You do not do any work that SAHMs do. Your kids and husband do everything. Your life is easy.

Now, if there was anyway you could sleep more, you would be golden.

Oh, I hope if schools are closed on Friday because of snow, your office have generous leave policy. Good luck!

Nobody said anything about husbands & kids doing everything around the house, just cleaning up after themselves.

-another SAHM