Any Jack & Jill members here?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^ I think I left out a sentence in my post, which might make it confusing but I think you can get the gist of what I'm saying.

I get what you’re saying. I literally didn’t know any better. We lived in Alexandria and decided when our oldest started school we would move closer to my job and also where the schools had higher rankings. I had no idea she would be the only black kid. I thought it would be diverse like Alexandria. We didn’t even check the demographics. We didn’t even think all white neighbors existed in an area like this. We have considered moving several times, but now she has friends to a certain extent. I’m hesitant to rip her out and this housing market is terrible. My husband has a good commute. I’ve searched everywhere ❤️. Like where does one even go?

We looked at Woodbridge but then you gotta hope for the lottery for the charter schools or do private.

I would love some advice. I’m heart broken everyday. Like she has found some good friends and distanced herself from others—. But I worry about stupid stuff or is it stupid. I always had self esteem issues and I really try to build her up. She is a beautiful girl and that’s not important—my point is she is starting to have crushes and the only options are of white boys. They don’t like her back. It sounds so stupid to some, but I don’t want her growing up feeling less than. Like I’m glad boys don’t notice her, but the message it send her is heartbreaking. If that makes sense. It’s not important, but it does something to little black girls self esteem.

This makes me sad and I really do understand how you feel. I live in DC so I know nothing about VA schools. I hope someone else has some good suggestions for you.

Sending you love OP. Non-black POC mom here and I have so much empathy for those fears/the hurt of a child feeling excluded.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, Thanks for the responses.

We live on the Rockville/Potomac border. We've struggled to find diverse churches that are anywhere close to us. I have learned that Sunday is the most segregated day of the week.

We are members of the National Cathedral and while we love it there it currently doesn't have Sunday school or a youth group (just the nursery which DD has aged out of).


I tried Mocha Moms when DD was a toddler but the women in that MoCo chapter seemed only interested in putting on a show. It seemed VERY superficial. DH and I have money but nothing to prove. The last I heard was that chapter is now defunct.

I guess there isn't a right answer for us. I think that J&J may be too pretentious for me to deal with. What I really want is a diverse group of kids with whom DD shares many of the same experiences. J&J and Mocha Moms are certainly (and intentionally) not diverse but what is?

I guess my search continues. . .

The Montgomery County J&J Chapter is really nice. Not pretentious. The Potomac Chapter is more pretentious.

What is the best way to get in touch with the MoCo chapter?

There should be contact information on their website. Be aware, you have to live within their geographical area. If you’re not, they will refer you to the Potomac chapter. Once you figure out which chapter is in your geographical area, you’ll have to find a sponsor and strike up a friendship. That’s the tricky part. It can’t be superficial, you really have to get to know each other before the mother will sponsor you.

[Anonymous]

If I’m white with an adopted black child I can’t join right?

[Anonymous]

Above PP. I’m in moco if that matters.

[Anonymous]

I’ve heard of white mom members in the DMV.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Above PP. I’m in moco if that matters.

There are white mothers in some chapters. None are in mine, so I don’t know their circumstances (adoptive mother, biological mother, etc.).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I’m white with an adopted black child I can’t join right?

Sure, if you have a friend that will sponsor you.

I’ve only known white jack and jill moms with black spouses. The spouse is typically a legacy.

[Anonymous]

Anyone a part of Baltimore County Chapter J & J (not Baltimore City)? Can you tell me about the chapter? I really would like to join the organization but having a hard time getting to know members for sponsorship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Biracial (black/white) woman here. Never heard of this organization until reading this thread. Interesting. How much exactly does it cost to be a part of this organization. Obviously I'm not thinking of being a part of it, I'm just curious.

Each chapter is different, the dues aren't that expensive I think the real spending comes from the mom sponsored activities that happen each month. So it does take time & money

I was told the DC J&J chapter was $8K per year.

One I know in VA is 5 grand

Just curious about the sources of this information... These amounts seem very steep. Is this for membership dues or are other variables included, e.g., travel, conferences, conventions, monthly activities?

dues -- info from chapter member

People exaggerate. I've been in 2 chapters. Those dues would be unusually high.

Dues are NOT $8k. 🤣

Please note the chapter you are referencing:
DC?
MoCo?
PG?
Potomac?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a white upper class mom with two adopted African American kids. My husband is black (his family is from Ghana). Could I join? Would we be welcome?

You can't join, you have to be sponsored. Would someone sponsor you? Depends on the relationship you develop with members.

Would you be welcome? Sure!

The husband can’t join them sponsor her? Is this just for women—where does Jack fit in? Can African Americans like Elon and baby X join or is the organization racist?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They may be UMC/UC but not one of them is truely wealthy and never will be.

????

Anybody can become rich only a few are wealthy. Oprah is rich, the Rothschields are wealthy.

What does wealthy mean to you? Which other billionaires aren’t wealthy? Which thousand or millionaires are wealthy? What about Bezos? Is he wealthy? He’s new money as well and was a trillionaire prior to his split. Or is Oprah not wealthy because she’s black?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was offered to be sponsored but I'm not sure I want to do this. I mean... the arrogance of some of the J&J members is more than I can stomach... The organization itself does not discriminate based on complexion any longer, but some of the children have been known to exclude and make fun of children with darker complexions. I know for a fact one young girl was being referred to as "Miss Celie."

People who join this type of club across the board have bigger problems. No matter what their education. One would have to have a screw loose, or fail to have critical thinking skills. Something education cannot help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They may be UMC/UC but not one of them is truely wealthy and never will be.

????

Anybody can become rich only a few are wealthy. Oprah is rich, the Rothschields are wealthy.

What does wealthy mean to you? Which other billionaires aren’t wealthy? Which thousand or millionaires are wealthy? What about Bezos? Is he wealthy? He’s new money as well and was a trillionaire prior to his split. Or is Oprah not wealthy because she’s black?

Oprah has a net worth of 3 billion dollars. In no universe is that not wealthy. Not sure what the PP is smoking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

ThriveGrow wrote:
As someone who is seeking to work- where do these families go for someone to watch their child(ren) when family is not nearby?

They hire nannies.

I think she meant where do they look for their nannies since she wants to work for them. May be wrong.

Frankly I find it odd that one would be looking for work for a family that belongs to a certain type of organization. If I am willing to hire anyone regardless of their color/ affiliations (except if they were racist/ negative affiliations) then I find it weird that someone I might employ would care if I belong to Jack and Jill or Junior league unless they were looking to get something out of it.

She wants to make sure her check is never late. I am not mad at her

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Years ago, my best friend wanted to join but was told no, because she was biracial. I remember how upset her parents were. This was in the late 50s.

This is how ugly rumors get started. My biracial DC is currently in a J&J chapter now, and our family has had absolutely no problems. There are several other biracial children in my chapter as well.

History is not rumored