Casual Racism

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think people have lost all grasp on what racism is. Racism isn’t mistaking a Korean for Chinese and speaking to them in an incorrect language due to a careless assumption. Get a grip.

Racism has lost all meaning when universities and companies can openly discriminate against people based on their skin color.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:OP maybe you shouldn't live around white people if their minor mistakes bother you so much. I'm also not sure what to make of your "mind reading" incident with the smell in the elevator. Do you have major anxiety or boredom maybe?

Agree - people move to a country where they were a tiny minority (like just above 1%), even into the 1990s and then when someone notices that they look different from the majority population, they are aghast. Did you or your parents understand what they were doing when they moved to the U.S.?

How about being appreciative that the population of the US has been so welcoming to people from around the world and recognize that people have to learn how to navigate a multi-racial, multi-ethnic society, because there has NEVER in all of world history been a society like ours. Give people a break unless they are being hostile to you.

These same people know how hostile and unwelcome they are to foreigners in their home countries yet expect the red carpet treatment in the US. Mostly they get the red carpet treatment, but sometimes they don't. Why should anyone else get worked up about this?

This shows a total lack of understanding of the history of immigration in this country. Some “tiny minority” immigrants who are not white have lived in the US far longer than the wave of Europeans who came over in the early 1900’s… and yet because they are not white they’re assumed to be not American.

A VERY tiny minority came to the west during the mid-19th century and that doesn't negate the fact that the vast majority of Asians arrived during the last 30 years (or were born to those immigrants.)

Wow, you are a serious kind of dumb. Moist ASian immigration has happened since 1993? I can't even...https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asian_immigration_to_the_United_States#:~:text=The%20first%20major%20wave%20of,from%20naturalization%20until%20the%201940s.

I’d say that you are the one who is ignorant. You need to look at numbers, not narrative, in order to answer this question. Please see census data by race for the U.S.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
BTW Asians are very bad in general identifying white peoples nationalities too. That’s not racism.

I worked with several Asian people years ago and we had this discussion. I asked what am I they said white. I was like I am Irish, my wife German, Bob is Polish his wife Italian, Dave is Jewish and our big boss is English and that guy is Australian and not even American as not a citizen yet.

It is as if they think White is a Nationality. I blew their mind when I told them Grant from our external auditor is from South Africa and is white.

My parents are born in Ireland my wife’s parents born in Germany but to most Asians I am white.

My friend is Japanese her father is English her mother Japanese and she was born and raised in Japan. She is not a US Citizen. When she went to NYU no one believed she was Japanese. Or they call her AmerAsian or American but she is not American. We had a crazy discussion with a Japanese business man she can’t be Japanese as speaks perfect English. She responded I an an English major at NYU. He bet us a round she could not prove it she whips out her IPhone clicks YouTube and she was a pretty famous Japanese Game show hostess and had a picture of her with Empress of Japan. He got us very drunk. He remembered her show.

Is any of this racist? No.

That's because you asked at work. If they have a beer in their hand they are Irish, a sausage means they're German. Joking aside, my white friends still enjoy the time they had to carry me out of a bar and I mentioned we were making an "Irish exit." I suppose they should have sat me down and lectured me about famine and years of discrimination but instead we have a good laugh.

[Anonymous]

Not OP, but I understand what OP is saying. I’m half Asian and so some people assume I am Latino or another race and say stuff in front of me.

For example, just a few weeks ago I overheard a person (happens to be in an important position that I am working for in a consulting gig) refer to the term ‘rice burner’ in a conversation, telling someone else he hoped they didn’t buy a ‘rice burner’ car. I was shocked as I have not heard that term be used in a long time. But yes, I hear or see various microaggresions on average of a weekly basis.

But with that said, I also know Asians that are racist against Muslims and blacks, so unfortunately it is the sad truth that racism is common across all races.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The reason people are so upset these days is that any acknowledgement of culture is considered racist. This also works in the other way-- any lack of acknowledgement is considered erasure and therefore racist. So it's impossible to live on a multicultural community without perceiving things as racist and being perceived as racist.

Who knows about the person who said xiexie. The OP gave no context clues so for all we know, it was a Chinese immigrant who spoke limited English and saw a similar face and made assumptions. Is that racist or... Normal?

I go to another country to visit family but I don't speak the language that well. Sometimes old people will stop me to ask for help, and I always listen intently to see if I can understand and help. Sometimes after they talk to me, I regrettably have to inform them that I don't speak the language well enough. Sometimes they laugh and act like this is hilarious because I look for all the world like I'm part of their culture. We're all white, so I can't call them racist. Nor would I. Because we are just people trying to relate to each other.

You can either be on guard to look for slights, or you can be open and look for community. I'm not saying that you should be naive about the existence of hate and racism. But if you're constantly looking for it, just casually evaluating everyone as potential racists, you will spend much of your life offended.

It’s not the acknowledgment—it’s the assumption. If you can’t tell the difference between Asian nationalities, maybe shut your ignorant mouth? Truly, you embarrass yourself.

Oh for Pete's sake. I have been asked if I'm a different brand of white than I am. I freak out and tell them that they are racist for not being able to distinguish Slavic and Scandinavian phenotypes. And if I had, they would have rightly called me a nut job.

When southerners say y'all, do you snap back that they are in "you guys" land? Get a grip.

If you don’t see how your situation is different from that of a racial minority, I don’t know what to tell you.

Sorry, you're not special. Sometimes in the elevator you might get the look if the people getting on after think it was you who farted. They don't care what percentage of the demographic you are.

No. I’m not special—I’m white. But someone calling out my whiteness affects me not one jot, because white is the predominant race here in the US. Calling out someone’s minority status is not only racist, it’s rude. Do you also say Shalom to people you think are Jewish? If so, please stop.

Hilarious! Actually people say Shalom to me all the time because I have an ambiguous last name but am not Jewish. Never cared one time.

If that is true, it’s super weird and you live among some very socially awkward people, at best.

Newsflash: people are weird. All the time. Are you brand new?

Are they all weird in racially inappropriate ways?

Were you born yesterday? Lock your doors at night?

You sure do ask a lot of irrelevant questions. I’m concerned you’re under the mistaken impression it makes you look intelligent or worldly.

So you have no reasonable response. Just here to complain.

Do you really want a response to the following idiotic questions:

1. Are you brand new?
2. Were you born yesterday?
3. Lock your doors at night? (This is a sentence fragment, fyi)

I assume these are all rhetorical questions through which you hope to make me feel stupid, but it’s not working, because it’s such weak sauce.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The reason people are so upset these days is that any acknowledgement of culture is considered racist. This also works in the other way-- any lack of acknowledgement is considered erasure and therefore racist. So it's impossible to live on a multicultural community without perceiving things as racist and being perceived as racist.

Who knows about the person who said xiexie. The OP gave no context clues so for all we know, it was a Chinese immigrant who spoke limited English and saw a similar face and made assumptions. Is that racist or... Normal?

I go to another country to visit family but I don't speak the language that well. Sometimes old people will stop me to ask for help, and I always listen intently to see if I can understand and help. Sometimes after they talk to me, I regrettably have to inform them that I don't speak the language well enough. Sometimes they laugh and act like this is hilarious because I look for all the world like I'm part of their culture. We're all white, so I can't call them racist. Nor would I. Because we are just people trying to relate to each other.

You can either be on guard to look for slights, or you can be open and look for community. I'm not saying that you should be naive about the existence of hate and racism. But if you're constantly looking for it, just casually evaluating everyone as potential racists, you will spend much of your life offended.

It’s not the acknowledgment—it’s the assumption. If you can’t tell the difference between Asian nationalities, maybe shut your ignorant mouth? Truly, you embarrass yourself.

Oh for Pete's sake. I have been asked if I'm a different brand of white than I am. I freak out and tell them that they are racist for not being able to distinguish Slavic and Scandinavian phenotypes. And if I had, they would have rightly called me a nut job.

When southerners say y'all, do you snap back that they are in "you guys" land? Get a grip.

If you don’t see how your situation is different from that of a racial minority, I don’t know what to tell you.

Sorry, you're not special. Sometimes in the elevator you might get the look if the people getting on after think it was you who farted. They don't care what percentage of the demographic you are.

No. I’m not special—I’m white. But someone calling out my whiteness affects me not one jot, because white is the predominant race here in the US. Calling out someone’s minority status is not only racist, it’s rude. Do you also say Shalom to people you think are Jewish? If so, please stop.

Hilarious! Actually people say Shalom to me all the time because I have an ambiguous last name but am not Jewish. Never cared one time.

If that is true, it’s super weird and you live among some very socially awkward people, at best.

Newsflash: people are weird. All the time. Are you brand new?

Are they all weird in racially inappropriate ways?

Were you born yesterday? Lock your doors at night?

You sure do ask a lot of irrelevant questions. I’m concerned you’re under the mistaken impression it makes you look intelligent or worldly.

So you have no reasonable response. Just here to complain.

Do you really want a response to the following idiotic questions:

1. Are you brand new?
2. Were you born yesterday?
3. Lock your doors at night? (This is a sentence fragment, fyi)

I assume these are all rhetorical questions through which you hope to make me feel stupid, but it’s not working, because it’s such weak sauce.

Funny how you reject answering questions and then just ask your own questions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not OP, but I understand what OP is saying. I’m half Asian and so some people assume I am Latino or another race and say stuff in front of me.

For example, just a few weeks ago I overheard a person (happens to be in an important position that I am working for in a consulting gig) refer to the term ‘rice burner’ in a conversation, telling someone else he hoped they didn’t buy a ‘rice burner’ car. I was shocked as I have not heard that term be used in a long time. But yes, I hear or see various microaggresions on average of a weekly basis.

But with that said, I also know Asians that are racist against Muslims and blacks, so unfortunately it is the sad truth that racism is common across all races.

Now, this is something I’d consider a micro aggression. No well meaning, understandable mistake. It’s either hatred or really problematic ignorance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know it’s not a contest but I feel like the anti-Black casual racism I face is just so much more offensive and undeniable. Someone trying to be nice and speak to me in my own language but guessing my nationality wrong is simply not a sign of deep hatred. People thinking you smell because it totally seems that a smell is coming right from you might not have anything to do your nationality. I never, ever thought I would question someone else’s claim to experiencing micro aggressions, but these examples…I don’t know.

But it’s not the kid’s “own language.” The kid’s own language is English because he’s American. His nationality is also American.

But he thought it was. He does not have the same information inside his head as you have inside your head. And the mistake he made was not that much of a leap. This is DC where a lot of people wish to raise their children to be bilingual. If I think of my closest neighbors with children, 4/5 of the families are raising their children with their parents’ first language (2 Spanish, 1 Vietnamese, 1 Korean) and English. It is not at all unusual to meet a child who speaks another language. This is not remotely difficult to understand. You cannot take another person’s perspective? You can’t be logical? You are not a victim. People make mistakes.

Why would he assume the kid’s language was not English? Oh right, because he’s Asian. So he made two faux pas: he assumed the child was not American because of his race, and then he incorrectly identified the Asian ethnicity of the child. Even if this guy isn’t racist, he’s a freaking moron.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know it’s not a contest but I feel like the anti-Black casual racism I face is just so much more offensive and undeniable. Someone trying to be nice and speak to me in my own language but guessing my nationality wrong is simply not a sign of deep hatred. People thinking you smell because it totally seems that a smell is coming right from you might not have anything to do your nationality. I never, ever thought I would question someone else’s claim to experiencing micro aggressions, but these examples…I don’t know.

But it’s not the kid’s “own language.” The kid’s own language is English because he’s American. His nationality is also American.

Doubt it. You know he’s some sort of hyphenated American. Not like those boring non descript Americans.

You are also a hyphenated American, unless you are from an indigenous group. FYI your statement is super racist.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The reason people are so upset these days is that any acknowledgement of culture is considered racist. This also works in the other way-- any lack of acknowledgement is considered erasure and therefore racist. So it's impossible to live on a multicultural community without perceiving things as racist and being perceived as racist.

Who knows about the person who said xiexie. The OP gave no context clues so for all we know, it was a Chinese immigrant who spoke limited English and saw a similar face and made assumptions. Is that racist or... Normal?

I go to another country to visit family but I don't speak the language that well. Sometimes old people will stop me to ask for help, and I always listen intently to see if I can understand and help. Sometimes after they talk to me, I regrettably have to inform them that I don't speak the language well enough. Sometimes they laugh and act like this is hilarious because I look for all the world like I'm part of their culture. We're all white, so I can't call them racist. Nor would I. Because we are just people trying to relate to each other.

You can either be on guard to look for slights, or you can be open and look for community. I'm not saying that you should be naive about the existence of hate and racism. But if you're constantly looking for it, just casually evaluating everyone as potential racists, you will spend much of your life offended.

It’s not the acknowledgment—it’s the assumption. If you can’t tell the difference between Asian nationalities, maybe shut your ignorant mouth? Truly, you embarrass yourself.

Oh for Pete's sake. I have been asked if I'm a different brand of white than I am. I freak out and tell them that they are racist for not being able to distinguish Slavic and Scandinavian phenotypes. And if I had, they would have rightly called me a nut job.

When southerners say y'all, do you snap back that they are in "you guys" land? Get a grip.

If you don’t see how your situation is different from that of a racial minority, I don’t know what to tell you.

Sorry, you're not special. Sometimes in the elevator you might get the look if the people getting on after think it was you who farted. They don't care what percentage of the demographic you are.

No. I’m not special—I’m white. But someone calling out my whiteness affects me not one jot, because white is the predominant race here in the US. Calling out someone’s minority status is not only racist, it’s rude. Do you also say Shalom to people you think are Jewish? If so, please stop.

Hilarious! Actually people say Shalom to me all the time because I have an ambiguous last name but am not Jewish. Never cared one time.

If that is true, it’s super weird and you live among some very socially awkward people, at best.

Newsflash: people are weird. All the time. Are you brand new?

Are they all weird in racially inappropriate ways?

Were you born yesterday? Lock your doors at night?

You sure do ask a lot of irrelevant questions. I’m concerned you’re under the mistaken impression it makes you look intelligent or worldly.

So you have no reasonable response. Just here to complain.

Do you really want a response to the following idiotic questions:

1. Are you brand new?
2. Were you born yesterday?
3. Lock your doors at night? (This is a sentence fragment, fyi)

I assume these are all rhetorical questions through which you hope to make me feel stupid, but it’s not working, because it’s such weak sauce.

Funny how you reject answering questions and then just ask your own questions.

No, there was no question mark in my reply to you. These were statements because I know you don’t want an answer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know it’s not a contest but I feel like the anti-Black casual racism I face is just so much more offensive and undeniable. Someone trying to be nice and speak to me in my own language but guessing my nationality wrong is simply not a sign of deep hatred. People thinking you smell because it totally seems that a smell is coming right from you might not have anything to do your nationality. I never, ever thought I would question someone else’s claim to experiencing micro aggressions, but these examples…I don’t know.

But it’s not the kid’s “own language.” The kid’s own language is English because he’s American. His nationality is also American.

Doubt it. You know he’s some sort of hyphenated American. Not like those boring non descript Americans.

You are also a hyphenated American, unless you are from an indigenous group. FYI your statement is super racist.

No, the only people who are hyphenating are those who want to distinguish themselves from basic boring white Americans. Don't play coy.

[Anonymous]

Okay, I skipped from the earlier pages to the last one of this thread and it doesn't appear to have gotten any more nuanced.

The neighbor may have thought they were being appropriate, possibly authentic, but they were not. Visibly invisible came to mind when I read about this interaction.

Regarding the elevator, my guess is that anyone getting on would assume the person already in the elevator was the "offender" of the bad smell. Yet we have seen a lot of anti-Asian bias over the decades/centuries with big spikes in recent times in '70s and especially again in COVID. So OP is not necessarily irrational to wonder if something was up.

I'm always puzzled why people, mainly white people, are so triggered when they hear about microaggressions. Isn't it just an opportunity to reflect on what is being said, think about their own attitudes/behavior, and possibly adjust accordingly?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Okay, I skipped from the earlier pages to the last one of this thread and it doesn't appear to have gotten any more nuanced.

The neighbor may have thought they were being appropriate, possibly authentic, but they were not. Visibly invisible came to mind when I read about this interaction.

Regarding the elevator, my guess is that anyone getting on would assume the person already in the elevator was the "offender" of the bad smell. Yet we have seen a lot of anti-Asian bias over the decades/centuries with big spikes in recent times in '70s and especially again in COVID. So OP is not necessarily irrational to wonder if something was up.

I'm always puzzled why people, mainly white people, are so triggered when they hear about microaggressions. Isn't it just an opportunity to reflect on what is being said, think about their own attitudes/behavior, and possibly adjust accordingly?

What it after reflection it is determined OP misjudged the situation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason people are so upset these days is that any acknowledgement of culture is considered racist. This also works in the other way-- any lack of acknowledgement is considered erasure and therefore racist. So it's impossible to live on a multicultural community without perceiving things as racist and being perceived as racist.

Who knows about the person who said xiexie. The OP gave no context clues so for all we know, it was a Chinese immigrant who spoke limited English and saw a similar face and made assumptions. Is that racist or... Normal?

I go to another country to visit family but I don't speak the language that well. Sometimes old people will stop me to ask for help, and I always listen intently to see if I can understand and help. Sometimes after they talk to me, I regrettably have to inform them that I don't speak the language well enough. Sometimes they laugh and act like this is hilarious because I look for all the world like I'm part of their culture. We're all white, so I can't call them racist. Nor would I. Because we are just people trying to relate to each other.

You can either be on guard to look for slights, or you can be open and look for community. I'm not saying that you should be naive about the existence of hate and racism. But if you're constantly looking for it, just casually evaluating everyone as potential racists, you will spend much of your life offended.

It’s not the acknowledgment—it’s the assumption. If you can’t tell the difference between Asian nationalities, maybe shut your ignorant mouth? Truly, you embarrass yourself.

Oh for Pete's sake. I have been asked if I'm a different brand of white than I am. I freak out and tell them that they are racist for not being able to distinguish Slavic and Scandinavian phenotypes. And if I had, they would have rightly called me a nut job.

When southerners say y'all, do you snap back that they are in "you guys" land? Get a grip.

If you don’t see how your situation is different from that of a racial minority, I don’t know what to tell you.

Sorry, you're not special. Sometimes in the elevator you might get the look if the people getting on after think it was you who farted. They don't care what percentage of the demographic you are.

No. I’m not special—I’m white. But someone calling out my whiteness affects me not one jot, because white is the predominant race here in the US. Calling out someone’s minority status is not only racist, it’s rude. Do you also say Shalom to people you think are Jewish? If so, please stop.

Hilarious! Actually people say Shalom to me all the time because I have an ambiguous last name but am not Jewish. Never cared one time.

If that is true, it’s super weird and you live among some very socially awkward people, at best.

Newsflash: people are weird. All the time. Are you brand new?

Are they all weird in racially inappropriate ways?

Were you born yesterday? Lock your doors at night?

You sure do ask a lot of irrelevant questions. I’m concerned you’re under the mistaken impression it makes you look intelligent or worldly.

So you have no reasonable response. Just here to complain.

Do you really want a response to the following idiotic questions:

1. Are you brand new?
2. Were you born yesterday?
3. Lock your doors at night? (This is a sentence fragment, fyi)

I assume these are all rhetorical questions through which you hope to make me feel stupid, but it’s not working, because it’s such weak sauce.

Funny how you reject answering questions and then just ask your own questions.

No, there was no question mark in my reply to you. These were statements because I know you don’t want an answer.

Exactly because you're so far out in left field, there's no need to take you seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason people are so upset these days is that any acknowledgement of culture is considered racist. This also works in the other way-- any lack of acknowledgement is considered erasure and therefore racist. So it's impossible to live on a multicultural community without perceiving things as racist and being perceived as racist.

Who knows about the person who said xiexie. The OP gave no context clues so for all we know, it was a Chinese immigrant who spoke limited English and saw a similar face and made assumptions. Is that racist or... Normal?

I go to another country to visit family but I don't speak the language that well. Sometimes old people will stop me to ask for help, and I always listen intently to see if I can understand and help. Sometimes after they talk to me, I regrettably have to inform them that I don't speak the language well enough. Sometimes they laugh and act like this is hilarious because I look for all the world like I'm part of their culture. We're all white, so I can't call them racist. Nor would I. Because we are just people trying to relate to each other.

You can either be on guard to look for slights, or you can be open and look for community. I'm not saying that you should be naive about the existence of hate and racism. But if you're constantly looking for it, just casually evaluating everyone as potential racists, you will spend much of your life offended.

It’s not the acknowledgment—it’s the assumption. If you can’t tell the difference between Asian nationalities, maybe shut your ignorant mouth? Truly, you embarrass yourself.

Oh for Pete's sake. I have been asked if I'm a different brand of white than I am. I freak out and tell them that they are racist for not being able to distinguish Slavic and Scandinavian phenotypes. And if I had, they would have rightly called me a nut job.

When southerners say y'all, do you snap back that they are in "you guys" land? Get a grip.

If you don’t see how your situation is different from that of a racial minority, I don’t know what to tell you.

Sorry, you're not special. Sometimes in the elevator you might get the look if the people getting on after think it was you who farted. They don't care what percentage of the demographic you are.

No. I’m not special—I’m white. But someone calling out my whiteness affects me not one jot, because white is the predominant race here in the US. Calling out someone’s minority status is not only racist, it’s rude. Do you also say Shalom to people you think are Jewish? If so, please stop.

Hilarious! Actually people say Shalom to me all the time because I have an ambiguous last name but am not Jewish. Never cared one time.

If that is true, it’s super weird and you live among some very socially awkward people, at best.

Newsflash: people are weird. All the time. Are you brand new?

Are they all weird in racially inappropriate ways?

Were you born yesterday? Lock your doors at night?

You sure do ask a lot of irrelevant questions. I’m concerned you’re under the mistaken impression it makes you look intelligent or worldly.

So you have no reasonable response. Just here to complain.

Do you really want a response to the following idiotic questions:

1. Are you brand new?
2. Were you born yesterday?
3. Lock your doors at night? (This is a sentence fragment, fyi)

I assume these are all rhetorical questions through which you hope to make me feel stupid, but it’s not working, because it’s such weak sauce.

Funny how you reject answering questions and then just ask your own questions.

No, there was no question mark in my reply to you. These were statements because I know you don’t want an answer.

Punctuation is hard, but just because you don't use it doesn't make your question a statement. But "Do you really want a response...." is a question.